Mian Mian - Candy (chinese)

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Candy (chinese): краткое содержание, описание и аннотация

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An international literary phenomenon-now available for the first time in English translation-Candy is a hip, harrowing tale of risk and desire, the story of a young Chinese woman forging a life for herself in a world seemingly devoid of guidelines. Hong, who narrates the novel, and whose life in many ways parallels the author''s own, drops out of high school and runs away at age 17 to the frontier city of Shenzen. As Hong navigates the temptations of the city, she quickly falls in love with a young musician and together they dive into a cruel netherworld of alcohol, drugs, and excess, a life that fails to satisfy Hong''s craving for an authentic self, and for a love that will define her. This startling and subversive novel is a blast of sex, drugs, and rock ''n'' roll that opens up to us a modern China we''ve never seen before. – Banned in China -with Mian Mian labeled the ''poster child for spiritual pollution''-CANDY still managed to sell 60,000 copies, as well as countless additional copies in pirated editions. – CANDY has been published in eight countries to date and has become a bestseller in France.
***
Sex, drugs, and rock 'n roll: ingredients for novels about modern China? Yes, SHANGHAI BABY by Wei Hui (Pocket Books, 2001) showed international readers modern Chinese youth were not immune to the running dogs of Western decadence: Globalization might even include mixing with dissolute foreigners. Following SHANGHAI BABY to English by a few years, Mian Mian now suggests with CANDY the decadence is more likely homegrown, possibly an inevitable side-effect of China's ascension to manufacturing colossus for the world. After this first novel by Shanghainese Mian was banned in China -an "honor" Wei Hui also earned – she was labelled a "poster child for spiritual pollution."
The buzz made CANDY an underground bestseller.
Whether Mian Mian harvested autobiographical details for her protagonist Hong's drug-plagued odyssey is open to question. She prefaces the novel with a note: "This book exists because one morning as the sun was coming up I told myself that I had to swallow up all of the fear and garbage around me, and once it was inside me I had to transform it all into candy. Because I know you all will be able to love me for it."
In a larger context, Hong's story, the characters in her life, often resonate with American stories we've heard of the Old West and Gold Rush days (whether in California or Alaska). She leaves Shanghai to seek her future in the new frontier of the Special Economic Zones the Chinese government created along the south coast in the 1980s, near Guangzhou. Not only did the SEZs permit a laissez faire approach to business-much of the Confucian social rules that apply elsewhere are ignored. In the SEZ thick with fortune seekers and finders, prostitution flourishes, as does alcohol and drug addiction.
Hong, only 17, has dropped out of a competitive high school, somewhat dispirited by the suicide of a classmate (an echo of Murakami's NORWEGIAN WOOD), when she leaves for the south. There she meets a young musician Saining and they become lovers, so often hopeless for each other and so often hopeless for their addictions. They survive, slacker-style, largely by the generosity of Saining's mom, who lives in Japan.
Hong's love for Saining has compelling moments of violence, promiscuity, and druggy indifference. But the greatest achievement of Hong's story, perhaps, is the honest testimony to the erasure of desire, the great sucking away of soul only addiction can wreak on a love that nonetheless won't go away. From a null point, from a Murakami-esque death in life, Hong goes on to find redemption can be hers.This stark portrait is not without lighter moments. For example, Hong's friend Bug is convinced he has AIDS. The horror of that discovery is brought alive. Page after page: consultation with friends, plans to leave the country, examination by a Beijing AIDS specialist. Finally, the revelation too many OTC drugs to get high had caused the troubling symptoms.
Like Murakami's post-consumerist young generation in Japan, Mian Mian suggests the same search for individual authenticity is underway in China. As China 's economic engine gains force, so does disillusionment among the young with the old ways. Hong suggests her ambivalence towards China 's rising star: "The moment the plane left the ground, I fucking burst into tears. I swore I would never come back to this town in the South again. This weird, plastic, bullshit Special Economic Zone, with all that pain and sadness, and the face of love, and the whole totally fucked-up world of heroin, and the late 1980s gold rush mentality, and all that pop music from Taiwan and Hong Kong. This place had all of the best and all of the worst. It had become my eternal nightmare." Hong awakes before the CANDY is gone. Mian's compassion for youth of New China elevates and brings irony to a story lesser writers might have passed off as sensation-ridden heroin chic.

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赛宁回来了,失魂落魄的。我把所有的事情向他汇报了一遍,他说他很伤心,因为那些人喜欢他的吉他,但他们没有机会弹吉他了,所以他伤心。

我问他为什么一个人先回来了?他说北京太夸张。每个人都活在感动之中,每个人都景着。他不适应这种集体生活,太热闹。那里清一色的重金属,插上效果器就甩头,而且很政治,他不理解。

接着他就过来抱我,我们迅速地做爱。

当天晚上我在他喝的阿华田里放了早就准备好的十粒安眠药。赛宁睡了两天,他醒过几次,我一直守在旁边,还扶他去洗手间。看着他昏迷的样子,我暗自欢喜,他是我的窗口和窗外的海洋,我必须仔细研究他。

等他完全清醒时,我告诉他这是我干的。他说反正类似的事你已经不是第一次了,十粒安眠药其实是最危险的,因为再多一点,可能我会吐出来,吐出来就没事,吐不出来就会有事,很可能会一睡不醒。

然后他过来抱我,他再次告诉我他永远不会让我离开他。这个混蛋从来不说他永远不会离开我。

他说你不该为没有证据的事找找麻烦。

我说我这不是在找你麻烦。因为找你麻烦也没用。我只是在渴望能够拥有你的全部,这么久了,我的渴望一刻也没停止过,我想我必须得有能力感动上帝。回

赛宁从北京回来后动不动就失踪几小时,而且很

少和我做爱,后来他终于向我承认他在吸食海洛因,并且已经成为“痛君子”。

我说“痛君子”?不会吧?你是不是搞错了?

海洛因,白色粉末,充满着被提炼过的感觉。吸食海洛因的动作很古怪,毫无美感,太化学!

赛宁说海洛因使他忘记这个世界的样子,给他安静,让他独处,令他安详。他说但是我没想到那么快就会上痛,我不喜欢这种被控制的感觉。

赛宁说人在茫然的时候最好的办法是走入一个漩涡,而他是一不小心走入海洛因这个漩涡的。

赛宁似乎是先我一步走入了一个致命的漩涡,我是这样认为的,我知道我也太容易犯这样的错误。所以我觉着我的赛宁实在是不走运。他常常会坐在阳台上一动不动几个小时看着外面,我也常常在和赛宁争吵以后走到阳台上,我看着那条大街,我想我的感受并不是痛苦,我只是慌乱。

我想我必须得帮助我的伴侣。

我把他看管起来。这是我唯一可做的。

我们之间渐渐失去信任。房间的每一个角落,赛宁衣服的口袋,他的脸色,他在洗手间干什么?他在给谁打电话?这些统统成为每时每刻的问题。那些别人介绍的戒药一点用都没有,我每天看着他受折磨。我不知道犯痛是一种什么该死的感觉,他说他犯病会死的我就信了,我的确很怕他会突然犯痛致死。他抓住了我的弱点,他常常用死来威协我。

很快人们一眼就可以看出他是个“痛君子’”,他有着“病君子”特有的苍白的消瘦和丢了魂似的神经质。

这天赛宁又失踪了。我回到家时看见他已回来了,看见他回来我就放心了很多,我一直担心他会被抓起来。他抱着那个著名的枕头坐在地上发呆,无知道他怎么那么喜欢这个枕头,去北京时居然也带着,他说没这个枕头他睡不着。他的面前摆放着几把吉他,我们家有

六把不同年代不同颜色不同用途的吉他。赛宁说每一把琴都有不同的音乐和感觉,我都喜欢,它们都是没有灵魂的,直到被我看上。

赛宁没有抬起头来看我,我也没理他。我开始收拾房间、洗澡、洗衣服。我喝了赛宁为我做的汤。赛宁会做很多美味家肴,他说除了音乐,他最爱的就是女人和食品。喝完场以后我走到赛宁对面坐下。我听他来回不变地在吉他上走着几个重复的旋律。

你今天去哪了?我找你找得累死了。

你不能这样,你抬起头来,我要跟你说话。

赛宁,我累了。今天我在电话簿上找到了戒毒所的电话,我去看过那儿了,我从来没这么鬼鬼祟祟过。那里的医生非常友好,他们把你当成普通的病人,他们不会把你当成罪犯。他们说政府鼓励自愿戒毒,他们会为你保密,并且负责到底。

我不去那种阴森森的地方。

你没有选择的。我们不能再相信那些江湖医生了!除非你告诉我你不想戒了。

你会在那儿陪我吗?

他抬头看我,他的眼睛颤抖着,他说话总是这么慢,他一脸无辜的样子让我感觉我们是多么愚蠢。

戒毒所有规定连探视都不允许的,但是我的心会时刻和你在一起我保证。我知道我无法体会你现在的感受,我们现在一定要齐心,让我们把这场噩梦快些结束好吗?我求你了!这个滥毒品把我们搞得乱七八糟的。

赛宁终于同意去戒毒所。那一个黎明我为他收拾衣物,我的宝贝我的眼泪他坐在阳台上,他坐在黎明垂落着冰凉的双手。他的另一首歌里唱着“我知道快乐的形状”, 他的一首歌里唱着“姑娘我输到了神的钱包”,现在我看 着赛宁就想着这两首歌,我看见冬日黎明惨白的颜色无休 止地抽打着他,而我只能在别处看着他,并不能把他带 走。

这个早晨我的眼泪几乎没有停过。我只是伤心,我觉着该死的海洛因把我的赛宁偷走了。赛宁一路上摸着我的手,我们什么话也说不出来。戒毒所追回了我为他准备的所有食品、小唱机、唱片、镜子、剃须刀。医护人员搜遍了他的全身,而他的目光始终没有离开过我。当工作人员把我送进电梯时,我听见赛宁突然很轻地叫了声我的名字,回过头时他已被带进了有一把大铁锁的病房。他对我那一晃而过的凝视,成了我痛不欲生的回忆。

我开始大量的喝酒。我经常在戒毒所周围游荡。我从来没有把酗酒和吸毒等同起来。在我看来我和酒的关系是柔和的、亲密的。酒有很多种姿态,酒最大的作用是可以令我放松让我温暖。我开始寄情于酒精。我的酒量越来越大,我几乎从不会喝醉了,我还研究出几种不会让人闻出我酒鬼气味的配方。事实上赛宁在戒毒所的40天里,除了买东西、给他的医生打电话、坐出租车,我几乎没有和什么人说过话。

赛宁从戒毒所出来那天我把自己搞得很夸张,我穿着兔兔拖鞋去医院接他,我们从来没分开过这么久,他对我的第一个微笑让我对生活变满了感激。

他看上去胖了一点,呆呆的,我们小心翼翼地避开毒品的话题,我想这一切总算过去了日子会好起来的。赛宁一直不和我做爱,他很安静,好像总是很累,但是我想这没关系,一切都会好起来的,反正他睡觉的时候我可以喝酒。回

真正噩梦般的生活是赛宁在几个月以后又开始吸

海洛因,他的态度很明白,他说没有毒品的日子他适应不了了。我说那我们还是分开吧,我不能不做爱,我得找新的男人。赛宁听到这里跑到洗手间吐了起来,他说你让我感到恶心!我说那你呢?你以前到处和别人睡觉,你真的以为我不知道吗?我只是骗自己起码你还没有离开我罢了。现在,你回到我这里,你却开始吸毒,这不 公平。

赛宁说我和别人睡觉是因为你有时逼我逼得太厉害, 有时我挺怕你的,我怕你怎么和你做爱?和你睡在一张床 上,看着你熟睡的样子,我有时会觉得我根本不认识你。 也许你也不认识你自己。我承认我是和别人来往,如果你 需要,我可以说对不起。你可以找别的男朋友,但就是不 能离开我,我们必须住在一起。

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