The door to the flat opened and Kieran and Monster stepped in. The door was a new one from the council and Monster locked it putting the inbuilt deadlocks in place. “The deadlocks will give him an extra three seconds” I dialogued to Judith. Then I added “It won’t do any good you know, to change history.”
Judith replied with aggressive vigour “I don’t intend to, think more laterally, I learnt this from Crowley he was a right cunning bastard you know, adept at magic; how he managed to turn a cowardly succession of victories into a glorious defeat, is a puzzle that keeps God awake at night; and I should know I’ve slept with him.”
With that revelation my heart appeared to sink and crash with the bang on the door. Which for a second I took to be its own journey. My old nick name was called out, “Monster, open the door” Came an angry voice between large vibrating slams.
Judith laughed “Ha! ‘Monster’ how apt, why not the Beast?”
I replied creasing my face in a wince at the pattern of events “That name was purely for the size of my drugs habit.”
Monster had got up and was kicking the door angrily “Give me the fucking money back”, the door took the strain but on the other side was the splintering of wood as the dead locks were pulled out. The door flew open and Monster made a dignified retreat into the living room with the pale and silent Kieren, as four burly and very angry Irish stormed in with chisels, hammers, screw drivers and iron bars, all with blazing red hair, one tall, one sad looking with a moustache, one fat and stocky looking like his flesh would explode if his blood pressure were to increase by a single degree, and of course, one with no legs I had only seen before in a wheel chair.
Judith analysed “That man has plastic legs, that’s as surreal as anything I’ve seen in the after world.” The slow and incredulous look dawning on Monster’s face showed a similar line of thought. Monster was now staring rudely.
The fat one called out “Sit down” and Monster did, somewhat defiantly though “Give me my fucking money back” he said. Possibly fearing repercussions from my six foot seven and huge supplier I noticed for the first time that the tall one slipped the purse with the cannabis deal money into a table draw when Monster wasn’t looking “You see I knew it, I always knew I didn’t misplace that money” But Judith had moved and she looked at me holding up a piece of chalk and proceeded to draw an ‘X’ several feet away from Monster’s chair.
The four, gathered round Monster with their weapons to Monster’s face, I looked defiant as counter accusations were made, but there was a diverted look on my face to the side and I knew Judith had stepped over and made her self visible.
Judith said with her friendliest and most reassuring look to a stunned me “Trust me. Move your chair three feet towards the window as though you are shrinking away, then insult them as bad as you can when I say now.”
Monster shrank away in his chair, and at that moment my alarm went off, I looked at my watch with it’s soft Dalliesque face. Then when I looked up Monster must have been given the cue.
“You shouldn’t even be hear, you’ve stolen your legs off your sisters action man, and as for you, you’re gonna a have coronary if you get any more angry or lift that bar in anger, why don’t you go back to your IRA momma…”
The tools came raining down but we were back in the spirit flat. God was taking the paggering of his life from the unseeing Irish, his body too soft in this dimension, the mask face cracked and mouth opened in a surprised “O”. His arm came up to protect himself from the blows and made a u-bend when a bar hit it. He crumpled to the floor and the Irish disappeared.
Judith laughed clapping and gave me a push “I bet you need a piss from that wine don’t you?”
My bladder was painfully full.
“Go on, do it; take a piss on God.” She carried on; pushing me again.
I unzipped my flies hastily and with difficulty, the zip was bendy. Then it poured yellow down on God, little steamy pools congregating on the rumples of his suit, his head covered by the busted alarm clock with it’s cracked face, still ringing, telegraphing his head ache, and the little bell hammer still beating him. An arm went in the air with a gesture and he disappeared.
Judith looked at me with an estimating smile, her eyes moving up and down my body. Well I had better be off, I’m going into hiding and I suggest you do the same, I left a little present for you first in the kitchen, it’s the wrap with the love heart on it. She disappeared.
I went into the kitchen and got the small paper wrap, heroin is usually in a tiny cellophane bag, it is usually speed in a wrap, I wondered what was in the wrap, possibly MDMA, I hoped so. I went back into the living room; I undid the wrap and put the contents on a spoon and cooked it up over my Zippo, a little piece of cigarette filter bobbed and floated in the spoon, for a moment I saw my self floating there, warm and relaxed, I pulled the substance into the needle and I gripped a tourniquet around my arm and I hit my arm to get some veins up, then I put the needle in my arm and pulled up the syringe to make sure there was blood in it. I injected the substance into my vein. I immediately felt a warm giddy melting feeling, like a large dose of LSD, I laughed uncontrollably and felt in love with Judith, that it had always been Judith and she had left me her love in a package. I looked at the wrapper to see if there was any left and there was a message in tiny letters with bigger letters signing it ‘God’. It read, “sorry I got there first and adulterated it, you’ve just took a hot shot, and boy is it going to get hot.” I groaned resignation mixed with pleasure and fell unconscious.
I awoke up in searing heat. Naked. So hot was it choking black smoke was burning off my body cramped and knelt in a small padlocked bird cage. I could not move my wings. The horizon was curved and everything was red lava with sulphurous clouds in the distance. A small bird toy mirror hurt me with its intense light dazzle in the cage, and I could see my stern face reflected. I gathered this was the famous Hell; another name for it might be the planet Venus.
I smiled in the mirror as a yellow cloud raced over and covered me; it burnt me in unbelievable pain. I watched in the mirror as its acidity dissolved my flesh and then the muscles tensing underneath until nothing was left but my still grinning skull. It was absolutely horrifying. Then the cloud went away and my flesh had a chance to reform. But the cloud came again, and again my flesh was stripped, and so on.
I pulled my little finger off my right hand and waited in horror for the cloud to come again. The cloud came and I reformed, this time with a bone finger loose to pick the massive lock. I knew how to pick locks from my squatting days and I went to work wriggling it in the lock. I sprang open the cage door and took big burning breath as I stretched my body upwards to get rid of the cramps and in triumph.
I set off for a walk, wandering for help; my wings were still hopelessly cramped and no good for flying. With every step I took my feet sank into the lava, the flesh on them unravelled and burnt away to the bone (I had bones here!) and then reformed as I lifted them out for another step. Some times the yellow clouds would come and I collapsed in a pile of bones, aware and waiting for them to pass. The Sun burnt down and followed, whipping me with tendrils of light that seared my flesh, it seemed to be alive in much the same way as an animal, moving in an attack formation backwards and forwards, in my dazed state I could not tell if this was true or an optical illusion, however, as I have stated, it is enough to imagine something is true here to make it so.
Читать дальше