As I made my way on, thinking how I could get away from here, whether any of my magic could possibly be strong enough, the clouds came again, just as the Sun lashed me on my arse so I fell to the floor, as I started knitting together again, a vulture of metal, suited to this climate, tried to make off with my severed arm as I gained flesh, I wrestled for the arm with my good one, and it spanned its wings in the air, shading me in a fan of metal blades and cogs against the bright light behind it, having pulled the bird in I tried to dash it against the ground, hoping to kill it and use it for shade and armour against the Sun, but it sped off, releasing my arm which I attached back. For some time later it made dives at me, tearing out clumps of flesh from my side and eating the liver.
As I detected a movement and a splash of sand on the ground, I was too late to still my travelling foot, and it came down on an emerald crusted lizard. The lizard bit me and as I lifted my foot high in the air it hung on to my smouldering big toe. I shook it off.
Immediately I realised the lizard had a defence poison of a paralysing and hallucinogenic nature as I fell to the ground. Not being able to help my imagination the lizard grew in size, stood on hind legs and took on some of the appearances of a man, the human face jutted its green chin in the air vainly and nonchalantly and its tail flicked me with burning dirt. Then the lizard multiplied and surrounded me. The lizard men did some kind of snake dance then flicking me with their tails they started to bury me with flesh dissolving mud. There was the ‘thud, thud’ of my own burial into the ground.
With some effort I managed to come around and imagined the lizard’s away and sweated its swelling and blackening poison out of my body. I stood up on my blackened and earth eaten shanks and carried on walking, because there were clouds gathering in the sky.
Much later on, I felt breathing on my neck, exited breathing which seemed sexual but could just as easily of been the breathing of some hungry beast anticipating an easy and sizable meal. I turned around fast and lighted on nothing, but then I noticed, as far as I could see, two sets of foot prints. I grabbed behind me and held on to something very sticky. The thing squealed and I turned to face it as it tugged away. I was face to face with a bikini clad woman, but elongated and black, a late evening shadow, her skin was covered in a tar like substance, perhaps a natural protection from the heat, the face was pretty with delicate bird like bones, but the eyes seemed way too white against the skin and her lips looked strange, being very pink against the black flesh, her tongue also very pink moved over her lips very eagerly, as though she was either unconsciously kissing me or about to eat a good meal. In the hand I had hold of something glinted and I wrestled it off her thinking it was a weapon. I was wrong, it was a picture of me inside a simple gold frame, I looked at it carefully and wondered. The woman got on her knees and begged for it silently, I gave her it back.
The clouds started swirling towards us and we both looked at them worried and anticipating pain. But there was a rumble in the distance and a small speck racing in front of the clouds and moving faster, the girl grinned, getting off her knees. The speck turned into a car, a fifties style car with fins on the back and the paint stripped off by the heat so it gleamed metallic, the wheels were on fire, blending in to the horizon. Three women as thin and shadowy as the one before me were in the car, also in bikinis.
The car pulled up to us and on seeing me up close the women put their heads forward opening their pink mouths wide and starred, then put their left hands to their heart and gave a Nazi style salute, which I took to be their form of greeting and returned. The woman who was with me beckoned to me to get in the car fast, I had gathered they were all mute or had no form of language; I also took in that this was Hell, and they were probably a bad lot. As the clouds approached we sped off, racing them, the flames from the tyres flowing curvaceously behind us and at our sides.
Eventually we were travelling on sand with the clouds some way behind us, the car stopped with a screech. We all got out and one of the women took a bucket and spade from the boot, the kind of bucket sand castles are made from, it had four simple turrets. The woman filled the bucket with sand, the sand was solid because it was partly molten, then she turned the bucket over on the ground, looking nervously at the approaching clouds as she did. With the castle made she mimed to me to jump on the castle. I did not know why she wanted me to destroy it, but she made the gesture of a leap on to the castle again and looked behind her and I did as she asked.
As I came down on the castle I did not destroy it, instead I had the impression of passing fast through a wall of sand, grainy against my body, my mouth was open and filled up with it, I landed in a cool room on my feet, the walls textured with the same sand that I now spat out of my mouth, I was inside the sand castle. Four other bodies fell in at all angles, landing awkwardly. I looked around, the room was not quite empty, there were pictures of a great battle carved in the wall, that appeared to be from Revelations, yet, I knew they had chosen to decorate with a Bible myth, a real fight against God, would not take that form, it was done as a glorious fairy tale by some probably very resentful women.
The women immediately gathered in a circle and started to gesticulate a kind of sign language, one began to hold her bosom and swoon; this was the one who had followed me. Another stood up and with authority made signs that I must depart; at once; fly away, and all nodded their heads, but there were tears in their eyes, I thought perhaps this was because they had not seen a man in a long time. I wondered why, if it was possible to escape, they had not done so themselves, and how exactly I could leave, when the great pressure and resistance of the planet made me feel my magic was dampened and all but useless, they, however, as I had seen, appeared to of retained at least some magic.
They left the safety of the castle with some haste; and I followed them out. Behind me the castle was just a small sand castle again. They quickly began dismantling the car, the wings, the doors and the windscreen came off. They were piled up and curved around, until they looked like some old B-movie rocket ship, complete with window, door and the cars fins as wings. Finally I was given the speed dial to hold in my hand, and the woman who had stood up ushered me inside. They looked through the windscreen at me and chanted in my face whilst holding it with their hands, leaving sticky black palm prints.
The needle of the dial in my hands moved straight to one hundred and forty, the highest it went, and flickered there. Outside went bright, the G-forces were incredible, pushing my now bubble body into distorted shapes. Then I was splattered against the screen in a liquid, and everything went black.
Next I heard a crash and I was falling out of the windscreen into my own living room, I tumbled upside down and saw the rocket wedged through my window, crumbling some of my wall. For better or worse I had returned to my familiar haunt.
As soon as I was back at the flat I slipped on a pair of rubbery jeans that distorted my never regions with their relative rigidity, pushing my balls up into my body, to my astonishment my trainers reformed over my feet. I was very dry throated, and what I had wanted more than anything during my recent exploit was a cup of tea. So looking around my now rather avant-garde looking home for a cup, I picked one off the living room floor and went into the kitchen. I put the kettle on the stove; it was an old fashioned kettle with a whistle on it, which you heated up on the stove, a memento from my grandmother. As I looked through the window I saw a hulking postman climbing up the steps, he was wearing a gas mask because of the atmosphere here; a letter went through my letter box. I went and picked it up and steamed it open over the kettle.
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