Monster was sitting in a chair smoking a cannabis pipe, Monster looked very ill; I had not been well at the time. Across from me on the sofa was the girl Alex and her boy friend Karl the busker, he was playing his guitar and Alex was smiling. Monster’s face looked suddenly drawn, he was shaking almost uncontrollably as though green with fear, his face trembled trying to maintain a smile, the pipe held in his arm in a complicit gesture fell to the floor, and he looked even more terrified as though going paler with the embers spilled from the pipe on it’s side on the floor. A magical connection. Even the chair trembled and Karl stopped playing, a smile froze on his face. Alex face was also trembling concerned with me. Monster said “Excuse me! I have to do something a second.” With a controlled effort he smiled and left the room. I followed him into the bedroom with sympathy. He put his hand on the wall and shaking and agonised with fear put his face against the wall opening his mouth, gasping, the eyes wide, he knocked his head against the wall. He looked down and saw his guitar on the bed, and, still shaking picked it up and took it into the other room, smiled and sat down.
Monster looked across at Alex and started playing like he had never played before, so fast on the acoustic guitar, almost superhuman, the fingers moved and the eye watched them fascinated, he forgot his fear and played and played what ever came into his head. To me it was like Dylan strummed and slapped his guitar then standing up and with a shunt of it on a bent leg, I was Hendrix in glorious psychedelic apparel, playing with his teeth and filling the room with bright musical colours over the mushy pea atmosphere of fear. To every one else I was playing fast and improvising basic guitar sounds.
I said to Judith “that’s the only time I ever played well.”
“Shush! Watch.” Judith said.
The playing continued for ten minutes, and then Monster stopped and smiled at Alex having forgotten his fear in his amazement and curiosity. Judith pointed at Alex with her finger, concentration on her face.
Alex’s face changed, transformed, the eyes were fixed and looked like an owl bird mask, except written on human flesh, the bottom jaw shook in a quizzical excitement. Then she shook her head in amazement, her mouth in a wide “O”. She looked beautiful.
“It was you who did that!” I exclaimed at Judith.
Judith smiled widely, looking me in the eyes, “Yes I’ve been here in the time line from time to time. I always kept my eye on you after you met Jane. I kept my eye on my biological duplicate, my genetic reincarnation.”
Looking majestic but playful and down to earth at the same time, very Jane, she informally scratched an itch on her bum, bending her legs; and said “Now you’ve seen you’re self in a stronger light, are you ready to go back and play a trick on God? Are you? Eh?” She tickled my chin with her finger.
The tickle carried on back into the spirit world, at my spirit flat. I asked a question of Judith. “If Jane is the same as you, except for her experiences, how is it she has a physical existence separate from her reincarnation?”
“The after life is a world of imagination, to imagine something successfully is to make it true, whilst in the concrete world, we imagine everything we see but it is tied in physically, we can not alter anything. Except for one magical thing, magic has its counterparts, what humans need and have imagined to be true, their deepest magical dreams, have their physical equivalent. A man wanting power through magic, to make his will real, can achieve nothing on Earth through conventional magic, but if he keeps imposing his will, the essence of magic, tied in to real methods and aims perfected, then he can achieve power or almost anything he wants, the great dictators of human history achieved power this way. Likewise on Earth it would be impossible to predict the future by means of a crystal ball or any other sort of supernatural clairvoyance, but events are the predictable outcome of material forces, so with the correct scientific method, an understanding of mass psychology, he could predict the future. Finally, reincarnation is a human dream, but accidental repetition or race memory makes it a reality, with Jane history accidentally repeated me, so I have an interest in her, but of that I will tell you nothing.”
“Perhaps I don’t want to know.” I lied.
“That’s a lie” Judith stated, “Now drink this” She said, producing a bottle of wine from behind her back and presenting it with a smile of triumph and knowing. She always made me feel like I wasn’t quite grown up, with out having any deep maturity herself. We were vital, which is; well vital. To be grown up is to lack vitality. May be since it comes from the id, and this world was all ids. To lack imagination and impulsiveness here, I already knew; could mean the certainty of the second death. The super ego destroys the person; a society controlled by the super ego with no persons will be stale and unproductive. Here it just all happened that bit faster.
I took a swig from the bottle, the wine was good, but dryer than I had ever tasted.
“Drink it all! Be a man eh?” She said with authority and a smile that appealed to the child in me.
“Why do you want me to drink it to myself? It’s very dry.” I asked this with a kind of macho inquisitiveness that was complicit, if I was to self analyse, which seems appropriate after discussing Freud.
“Why I want you to drink it all is a secret, there is an ingredient not very magical that will soon have an effect and not the alcohol, though that will give you a bullish strength. As for being dry I baked you some biscuits that I want you to eat that will make it even dryer.”
She produced some biscuits in a paper bag from behind her back again. “Here!”
I ate a biscuit, I felt like I was in some kind communion, a giving of love, that I was eating something she had baked herself. “That’s nice, what’s in it?” I asked energetically.
“Meal, honey, leavings of red wine, Abremaline and olive oil and the rich freshest blood from my moon cycle.”
On the last bit I spat crumbs in her face carelessly, she was not amused.
Sternly she said, “I put a lot of effort into those, it was Aleister Crowley’s recipe and no one gave God more shit than him. Except Lucifer. At least drink the wine, it is essential in a most remarkable way, the satisfaction of which will become clear later.”
I drank the whole bottle of wine straight down, to please her again and to impress her, to be her man. It burned my throat and reddened my lips. It hit me and I fell back on my toes, almost taking to the air on my back.
“We are going to set God a little trap” she smiled producing a piece of chalk in her hand. She marked my armchair with it. I felt a silly injury to my house proud ness, like she was hurting me but it felt good. Then I thought how silly that was with the crumbling walls and the burnt carpet. The markings she drew were obviously of the craft but I did not recognise them. She smiled and produced an old fashioned alarm clock with hammer and bells from behind her back again. “This will go off at a certain time and summon him we will not be here, I think he will come, he is expecting you to lay out your terms and make a deal, to save his skin, which he probably sheds in the Sun anyway. I want you to synchronise your watch and set the alarm to the same time.”
I did, “Where are we going?” I demanded to know.
“Back to an unpleasant but brave moment for you; the Irish.” She stated a little sullenly for my benefit.
“Oh God not the Irish” I said.
Then we were back at my old flat in Avenham, it was empty. I heard a crash far off “That’s the brick with the note on it going through their window” I said, amusedly stating a regrettable fact. There was the sound of trainers going up the flat stairs, “That’s me and ginger Kieran returning” I continued.
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