Barbara Angelis - What Women Want Men To Know

Still, with all of this input, the best I can do in these chapters is to generalize about the way women are. All of us are unique and different. And while many women will find the descriptions of how we think and feel, and why we do the things we do, accurate, others may, at times, read what I’ve written and say, “I’m not that way at all.” The truth is I know many men who have more of the “female” characteristics and motivations I describe (straight men as well as gay men), and on the flip side, I know many women who demonstrate more of what might traditionally be called “male” habits. I know men who are the ones in a relationship desperately needing attention and reassurance, and women who are shut down and hate talking about feelings.

The bottom line is that all things don’t apply to everyone. I am attempting to communicate what I’ve heard and learned over the years without being accurate to every subgroup. So the best way for you to read this book is to take what feels pertinent and valuable to you, and don’t worry about the rest. And of course What Women Want Men to Know isn’t everything women want men to know – to complete that task I would have to write volumes! I have tried to include the information I felt was most important and useful.

I hope this book will be everything you want it to be. I hope that after reading it you will love and honor yourself more and judge yourself less. I hope it will open the doors of clarity and communication between you and the man you love. I hope it will give you the words you need to say so that your partner can understand you from the inside out. I hope it will be a source of comfort, strength, and inspiration, reminding you that you are not alone on your journey. Most of all, I hope this book brings you many steps closer to creating the kind of loving, fulfilling, and passionate relationship you’ve always dreamed of.

What if I told you that by doing a few simple things, you could get the woman you love to stop acting in some of the ways that drive you crazy? What if you knew some magic words to say that would work in seconds to make a woman feel like you were the most wonderful mate she could ever imagine? What if I taught you some secret techniques that would make your partner want to have more sex with you?

Do I have your attention yet, guys? Does any of this sound interesting? If so, you’ve come to the right place, and you’re reading the right book!

Let me alleviate any suspicions you may have and say from the start what this book is not:

It’s not a “chick book,” written just for women, that I hope your wife or girlfriend will somehow convince you to read.

It’s not a thinly disguised condemnation of men, explaining how it’s all your fault.

It’s not chapter after chapter of instructions to follow that will make you feel as if you have no power in your relationship and are just obeying orders.

It’s not a book designed to make you more like a woman, and less like a man.

I wrote What Women Want Men to Know to help you feel more successful, more powerful, and more in control of your love life. I wrote it so you could have more of the things you want in relationships, and less of the things you don’t want. It’s a book written specifically with you in mind, a book written to make your life easier.

I’ve spent the past twenty years working with tens of thousand of people, about half of them men. Men of all ages and from all backgrounds have opened up and shared with me what frustrates them in their relationships, what confuses them about women, and what they want in the areas of love and sex. I’ve been listening carefully, and here’s some of what I’ve heard men want:

You want to feel successful in your relationship, like you’re doing a good job and not messing it up.

You want less hassle, stress, and drama.

You want more peace, calm, and harmony.

You want frequent and passionate sex with your partner.

You don’t want to have to emotionally process all the time and feel as though you’re always “working on things.”

You want your mate to criticize you less and appreciate you more.

You want to feel like you’re making your woman happy.

This book is designed to help you achieve these goals. How? By understanding more about why women are the way they are, and learning some simple, practical ways you can communicate with us and relate to us that will make you and your partner happier and more satisfied in every way.

Now I have some really great news for you:

You know all of the stuff you hate about how women can get? Our neediness, our clingyness, our insecurities, the feeling you have that no matter how much you do or give, it’s never enough for us? I want you to know that so much of this is avoidable. Perhaps a woman has tried to explain: “If only you’d do x or y , it would make such a huge difference,” and you’ve thought to yourself, “Yeah, right.” But I’m here to tell you that this is the most important secret about women you will ever discover:

When you learn just a few simple things to do and say to the woman in your life, you’ll prevent her from having the very kinds of emotional reactions that you dislike.

Does this sound too good to be true? Well, it isn’t. I wrote What Women Want Men to Know to offer you the information you need, presented logically, clearly, and to the point, for creating the kind of relationship with a woman that is fun, enjoyable, satisfying, and much less work than you could ever imagine.

Are you convinced that this book is worth reading yet? I hope so!

Recently I gave a lecture to a large group and included some of the material you will be reading in this book. During the question-and-answer session, a man stood up and said defiantly, “I’m what you might call a macho sort of guy, and I’m having a hard time with this. It sounds like what you want is for me to basically think like a woman; act like a woman; in other words, to become a woman.”

“Why do you think I want you to become like a woman?” I asked him.

“Well, if I’m always trying to figure out what my wife wants, and remembering her three basic needs like you talked about, and do this and that little thing to make her happier, aren’t I becoming like a woman?”

“Let me ask you a question,” I replied. “Do you own a car?” The man nodded. “Is it a nice car that you’d like to keep for a while?”

“Yes,” he said proudly. “Actually it’s only a few months old.”

“Okay, so did you read the manual when you got the car?”

“Sure,” he said.

“And the manual taught you how to operate the car properly, what kind of gas to use in order to run the vehicle efficiently, what warning signs to look for that might indicate you’re having problems, when to get checkups so the car can last for a long time, how to service the car so it doesn’t break down, and stuff like this, right?”