Placing the phone back on the charger, I took another deep breath and looked at the carbon copy of the man I loved with all my heart. “I love him, Aren. I didn’t want to hurt him, but I didn’t want him to give up his family for me. He doesn’t know how lucky he is to have all of you in his life.”
“The question is, will you give us the chance to have you in our lives? I know you’ve seen me on less than my best behavior, but can you handle an entire Pack? Because in spite of our bad attitudes and fighting, we always know beyond a shadow of a doubt that if we need help, we’ve got each other’s backs.”
“But you’re all wolves. I’m…not.”
His mouth curved into a crooked grin. “We’ll still be there for you even though you’re a kitty.”
I elbowed him. “Jaguar. A big, scary black one. Adam showed me a picture. I’m ferocious.”
Aren tipped his head back and laughed. I’d never heard him laugh before, and I felt warmth fill me. I had a brother.
“Glad you find this funny.”
We both looked up to see a very unhappy Adam staring at us. Aren stopped laughing. My smile drained from my face.
Aren pulled himself up on his crutches. “I’ll let you two talk.”
He moved really fast for a guy with a broken ankle.
Adam didn’t move. He stood across the room, pinning me with his stare.
I met his eyes and whispered, “It was because I loved you that I was going to leave.”
“No.” He shook his head. “It’s because you’re a coward.”
“What?” I dropped my bag and my brow furrowed. “I am not. I just wanted you to be happy. I love you, and I was putting your needs before mine.”
“You love me and it scares the crap out of you.”
My jaw dropped, and the volume of my voice rose. “What scares me is that Nero will come back and hurt you and your family.”
“It’s easier to live life on the run, isn’t it? You don’t ever have to worry about getting hurt that way. When things get uncomfortable you just move on to the next city. No one to worry about but yourself.”
“That is so unfair,” I yelled, pointing at him. “I never asked to live like that. I never got to know my parents or have a family. You have everything I ever wished for and you treat it like shit.”
I started to pick up my bags, but he came across the room and grabbed my hand. “And the moment you had a chance to have everything you wished for, you were going to run.” He stared into my eyes, and his expression softened. His free hand came up to cup my face, and I felt all my rage and frustration start to crumble. “I am so sorry I didn’t tell my family about us and force them to accept us right from the beginning. You weren’t the only coward, Lana.”
I pulled my hand free and gave him a half-hearted shove. “I wasn’t being a coward. I never wanted to leave you, Adam.” I stared into his eyes, hoping he could see the truth in my words. “I love you so much. I couldn’t go on if something happened to you because of me.”
“Then we should stay here. We have strength in numbers. We can fight Nero. But I can’t lead the Pack and be the Alpha if I’m worried that I’ll come home from a ride one day and you’ll be gone. If that’s still in your mind I won’t be able to think straight, Lana.” He bent to kiss me before continuing. “From the first moment I looked into your eyes, you had me. I could never leave you, and dammit it hurts like hell to know you could leave me.”
A tear spilled down my cheek as I shook my head slowly. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, Adam. But if I stay, it will be forever, so you better not let Nero hurt you.” I kissed him and bit at his bottom lip playfully. “Or I’ll be pissed.”
He smiled and scooped me up into his arms. “Angry cats are the worst.”
“And don’t you forget it.” I laughed sliding my arms around his neck as he carried me back to the bedroom.
He laid me down on the bed and pulled me into his arms. “Malcolm was right about the baby.”
I looked up at him. “Really? You can tell too?”
He shrugged. “Your scent is different, and when I’m very close to you I can hear a faint heartbeat next to yours.”
“That’s impossible. Even if I was pregnant, it’s way too soon for a heartbeat.”
“Gestation for us isn’t as long as for humans. That’s part of the reason why a human woman can’t get pregnant with us until we convert her.” His hand slid down over my still-flat abdomen. “Jaguars must be similar. We’re both shifters.” Splaying his fingers out he smiled at me. “Plus, you’re glowing.”
“What?” Now I was completely lost. “You’re sleep-deprived. I look like hell.”
“No.” He smiled, looking way too sexy for anyone’s good. “You look amazing. More alive and more beautiful than you ever have.”
I kissed him and murmured against his lips. “Now you’re just trying to get lucky.”
“Is it working?”
I tangled my legs with his and slid his hand up from my belly to my breast. “What do you think?”
I woke up when the first car pulled in, but I didn’t move. Lana was still sleeping, curled up and facing me. She had a hint of a smile on her lips. It was all I could do not to kiss her again. I wasn’t ready to get up and face the reality of what lay ahead for us tonight.
We had made love long and slow before falling asleep, whispering secrets we’d never share with anyone else. Her love filled a place in my heart that I never realized was empty. I never knew love could be so honest and real and overpowering. When she looked at me with her dark eyes filled with emotion, I felt like the luckiest man on earth, like a superhero, like anything was possible.
But none of it was going to bring my father back.
Another vehicle pulled down the drive to the barn. It sounded like Jason’s truck. Jason . Suddenly I knew I needed to talk to him. I sensed it. My brow furrowed. Strange. Did he feel like he’d let the Pack down by not being able to save Malcolm? On some level I never knew existed, I knew he needed me.
I kissed Lana’s cheek, drinking in her scent like a balm for all the wounds in my heart. She stretched and her lashes fluttered. The sight of her smile as she opened her eyes made my heart pound.
“Is it time to get up?” She stretched her arms over her head.
I nodded. “Yeah, the Pack is here. We better get down there.”
Her smile vanished, and she took my hand. “I’m sorry, Adam.”
I brought her hand to my lips and kissed the back of her fingers. “We’ll get through this.”
Then another sixth-sense-type realization hit me. Aren. Something was…off with him. I focused on Lana again. “This is going to sound crazy, but I need to tell you something.”
Lana chuckled. The sound of her laughter was a gift. I’d never be able to tell my father goodbye without her shoulder to lean on.
“I turn into a jaguar once a month, and I’ve seen what an amazing wolf you are when the moon is full. What could be crazier than that?”
“My dad used to have a sense about the members of the Pack. It was creepy sometimes how he’d know something was wrong and then just show up. He did it to me a couple of times after I first met you. Every once in a while he could almost finish your thoughts for you even though you didn’t say anything out loud.”
“Maybe he was a little bit psychic?”
“He said something to me last night about how I would know how to be the Alpha. I thought he was crazy, but now…”
Her brow creased. “Are you all right?”
I nodded. “I’m fine, it’s just that now… I sense them. Like when Jason drove in, I knew I needed to talk to him tonight. I could feel his guilt over my father dying.”
Читать дальше