Lisa Kessler - Moonlight

“What if I can’t do it?”

He took my hand. His skin felt cold.

Lana looked over at Jason. “Can you get something to cover Malcolm please?”

Jason nodded and headed in the direction of the downed Nero team.

How did she know what I wanted before I even asked? Could everyone do that but me?

My father smiled up at me, his voice now a whisper. “If you ever need help, turn to your mate. There is a bond between you that will make both you and your Pack stronger.”

Jason came back with a few shirts and a windbreaker. He and Aren covered Malcolm, and I watched his eyes drift closed again. His breathing got more rapid, thinner. Jason took his pulse and our eyes met.

“Not long,” Jason mouthed.

I squeezed my eyes shut against the tears that threatened. Kneeling beside my father, I took his hand, holding it tight. “I’m sorry, Dad.”

“For what?” he murmured without opening his eyes.

“For never paying attention when you tried to teach me things. I’m sorry I spent so much time being a selfish bastard.”

His eyes opened, and he gave me one last smile. For a moment he looked like he did so many times when he stood in my house telling me to grow up and stop wasting my life. The weight of how much I was going to miss him cut through me like a dagger.

“I always knew you would be there when I needed you most.” He gave my hand a weak squeeze. “I need you now. The Pack needs you.” His breath hitched, and his lips pulled back in pain. “Lana needs you,” he wheezed. “Tell my grandchildren I loved them before they were even born.”

I pulled him into my arms, holding him tight, as if I could force his spirit to stay inside his ailing body. “Don’t go. Please.” I heard his breathing get shallower and panic seized me. “Please, no. Dad, I need you. No.”

I heard his last breath, and then he was still. I held him tight, oblivious to the wind that stung my bitter tears. The Pack circled us and howled at the moon, singing my father’s soul to the other side.

…

Back at the barn, I stared at my father’s face. He looked peaceful, like he was only sleeping, but he wasn’t ever going to wake up. The pyre was built out back, and tonight we would celebrate his life and finish the ceremony by cremating his remains. I hadn’t slept. I couldn’t.

I had left Lana sleeping in my…our bedroom. She’d worked right beside me all through the night, helping the Pack dispose of the bodies and all other evidence of the fight with Nero. Knowing she was close helped me focus on the work. I’m sure she had plenty she wanted to say to me, but she didn’t push. I also knew I probably should say something to her about the twins—or at least I figured they would be twins. It was in our natures—and about me being the Alpha now. But I didn’t have time for words, and somehow she seemed to understand.

When we had first gotten back to the ranch, we’d fallen right into bed. At some point Lana drifted off, but I kept staring at the bruises and cuts around her tiny wrists. We never found Sasha’s body, but we assumed she was part of the death toll. Lana had seen Aren drag her away—her remains could’ve been left for scavengers. I didn’t ask him outright if he’d finished her, but I didn’t have to. He would’ve told me if she’d escaped.

Sebastian slipped away. He may have gotten away in the Nero van, or maybe he ran during the fight. It didn’t matter right now.

The sun was rising. A new day. I stood in my barn with all I had left of my father. His empty shell.

“Couldn’t sleep?”

I turned around to see my brother, on crutches, making his way down the barn aisle. I nodded and focused back on Malcolm. “Yeah.” Aren pulled a stool over and sat beside me. I shook my head. “I still can’t believe he’s gone.”

Aren nodded. “Me neither.” He paused and looked over at me. “I’m glad you told him about Lana.”

“He wasn’t happy about it at first.”

Aren shrugged. “If I brought home a jaguar for a mate, you wouldn’t have been happy for me at first either.”

I thought about it and had to agree. “I guess you’re right.”

“She was amazing last night,” Aren said quietly. “In spite of everything, she never lost her head.”

“So you trust her now?”

He nodded. “With my Alpha’s life.”

My shoulders tensed. “Don’t call me that.” I looked at our father and blinked hard to hold back the bitter tears. “Not yet.”

Aren rested a hand on my shoulder and squeezed. “You acted like an Alpha last night.”

“I cried like a boy who lost his father.”

“You were. So was I. Doesn’t make you any less of an Alpha.” His hand lifted from my shoulder as he went on. “None of us were thinking straight last night. We never would have cleared the lake of the evidence. In the chaos, the wolves would have scattered and met back here. But we stayed and we made the right choices because you did, Adam. In spite of the pain and fear and rage, you put the Pack first.”

I clenched my jaw to bite back the wave of emotions brewing inside of me. I met Aren’s eyes and whispered, “I was going to leave this morning with Lana. I wasn’t putting the Pack first then.”

Aren shook his head. “You wouldn’t have gone.”

“You’re wrong. I was ready. We were going to leave this morning to draw Nero away from Reno.”

He was quiet for a moment, and I watched for any sign of how he was feeling, but Aren’s face was a mask. Finally he looked up from Malcolm and met my eyes. “Are you still leaving?”

His question jarred me. “I don’t know.”

Aren’s brow furrowed, and he shot up off the stool, wincing in pain when he put weight on his injured ankle.

“You don’t know?” he fumed, grabbing a crutch to lean on. “You selfish asshole. How can you say that, Adam? If you leave now, then you leave the Pack with me, an injured Alpha. You remember what that means, right?”

“What does it mean?”

We both turned and saw Lana walking toward us. Her dark hair was mussed from sleeping and she looked exhausted, but somehow in spite of all that, she had a glow of natural beauty that blinded me.

Aren glared at me and then answered Lana. “If he doesn’t become the Alpha of our Pack, then I would be next in line. Since I can’t lead the Pack right now, one of the others would have to step forward.”

I finished it for him. “Once they step forward, they have to fight Aren to the death for the Alpha spot unless he agrees to leave Pack territory.”

Lana’s eyes widened. “What?”

Aren nodded and snatched up his other crutch. He kissed her cheek as he passed by and growled, “Please knock some sense into my idiot brother.”

I watched Aren go, trying to steady myself. God, was I so starved for a family that a simple peck on the cheek from Adam’s brother made my heart sing? Apparently the answer was yes, because the small gesture made me feel like part of the family.

Adam was sitting on a stool, facing his father’s body. I couldn’t imagine his pain. I’d always wished for a father, wished I’d even just known who he was. I used to imagine he’d be proud of me. Maybe he was a writer like I was.

But Adam had all of that. And now his father was gone.

I stepped up behind him and massaged his shoulders. They were like cement. His head fell forward, and he moaned. I kissed the back of his neck while I did my best to loosen the knots. I could almost feel the weight of the world resting on his broad shoulders.

“What were you and Aren fighting about?” I figured it was best to approach calmly, casually, though I knew where the conversation would inevitably go. Adam was not leaving his brother here to be killed.