Violet Blue - The Ultimate Guide to Fellatio - How to Go Down on a Man and Give Him Mind-Blowing Pleasure

• Try long strokes, short, slow strokes, or a rapid in-and-out motion.

• Adjust the pressure in your hand by making it snug for entire strokes, or constrict your grip when you go down to the base of the shaft, or at the head.

• Vary your suction. Increase it for a few strokes, then release. Try using more suction on either up or down strokes.

• Play around with the different ways you can create suction. Try pulling with your lips, by creating a vacuum with your tongue, or pulling by constricting your throat. Each way will feel different to him.

• Try using no suction at all, with either a tight or a loose hand.

• Hold your mouth still and pump with your hand.

• Pull the foreskin down tightly while only your mouth goes up and down.

• Twist your head as you go up and down. Try it for the length of a whole stroke, or only when you reach the tip. Twist on up or down strokes, or both.

• Twist only your hand, with the same variations.

It stands to reason that once he’s very aroused and close to orgasm, he probably won’t know exactly what you’re doing; he’ll just know if it feels good or not. It’s up to you to remember what worked and what didn’t.

• Hold still for a moment and squeeze only your mouth and throat in rhythm.

• Experiment with keeping your tongue in constant motion.

• Allow him to make the motion by thrusting his penis in your mouth while you hold still—this is called irrumation.

Touch the back of your tongue with a toothbrush, and you’ll feel that dreadfully familiar involuntary reflex shared by all—you’ll gag. The entire back of the mouth and soft palate are wired with nerves that are auto-programmed to trigger muscular convulsions in your throat when touched, constricting the opening of the throat and sending signals to your stomach to begin a queasy lurch. This is how the body protects itself from choking on oversized objects. We are not serpentine; we cannot unhinge our jaws. Put something bigger than your mouth into your mouth, and you will gag.

Everyone gags at some point during a blow job. It may take several blow jobs or several years of giving them to gain control over your reflex, and even seasoned pros at fellatio gag sometimes. At first it’s unsettling and challenging. Your eyes will water, and your nose may run—some partners find this sexy. But with time, practice, and comfort with oral sex, you can learn to overcome your body’s natural instinct to push back at whatever’s pushing in. No one ever overcomes it completely, but there are techniques that help, and staying cool-headed is important.

I try to deep throat, but my stomach always churns. What I do is take him really deep for one stoke, then not deep for a few, then deep again for one stroke. Guys really love this, and they don’t seem to notice that it’s for only one stroke that they’re really deep.

Learn to make incorporate your anti-gagging techniques into your act. The Flying Wallendas were the greatest tightrope walkers in the history of circus performance. They believed that when learning tightrope, one should avoid the aid of tethers or nets, so as not to get too dependent upon them. The thinking was that if you came to rely on these aids, you would take their existence for granted and someday forget that they weren’t there, and fall. This encouraged them to practice falling, to the extent that they made falling into an art form. When they fell during performances, they would slip and cling to the rope with such style and grace that everyone believed it was all part of the act. You can do the same with gagging, a potentially unsexy response to an intimate sex act: when you feel yourself beginning to gag, make pulling him out of your mouth and taking a rest until the feeling subsides part of your act. Learn techniques for overcoming your gag reflex in chapter 9, “Deep Throat.”

As you sense his excitement building, narrow your focus onto one or a combination of two specific stroke techniques he likes. Using these, establish a beat—a consistent and predictable rhythm with the strokes. When using one stroke, go at a steady pace and try gradual increases and decreases of your tempo. With two stroke combinations, use one for five or six beats (strokes), then switch to the other stroke for the same amount of time and back again. For instance, you can bob up and down the length of his shaft using your hand pressed to your lips and a little suction, then switch to holding the head in your mouth while you stroke with your hand, then switch back.

Men differ in their rhythm preferences, and you’ll find that he may require an increase, decrease, or no change at all in order to achieve orgasm. You can find out by asking if he wants it faster or slower, but don’t interrupt the activity too much or you’ll risk decreasing the heightened state you’ve got him in—keep stroking him with your hand if you pause to ask. You might ask him to masturbate for you; watching what he does right before he orgasms is extremely instructional. But these options aren’t always available, and sometimes you’ll just have to pay very close attention to his response. When you make a change and see his pre-orgasmic tension increase or decrease, you’ll know. Some men will love a steady, firm, driving rhythm, then want a few quick strokes to make them come. Others won’t require any change at all and will orgasm in one fluid movement during one of your strokes. Your rhythm (and how it’s used) is what’s going to make him come, so tune in to his body language (that is, if he’s not disturbing the neighbors with his cries and moans of pleasure), and watch for the signs of imminent orgasm.

Wanting to be the gentleman, I announced well before the fact that I was getting ready to cream. Much to my surprise and joy, she did not stop sucking…

An oncoming orgasm in a man can take many forms. He might be the vocal type, telling you he’s about to come, or his moans and yummy noises could reach an audible crescendo. There are physiological signs, too. His muscles may tense in different parts of his body, such as thighs, jaw, abdomen, hands, and feet. In most men, the testicles retract, hugging the body, and the penis stiffens to its fullest point before the rhythmic contractions of orgasm begin. His hips might begin to thrust, or he might grind his pelvis in your face—sometimes quickly, in rough jerks, but sometimes the movement is subtle and barely perceptible. He could slowly seem to be getting closer and closer to your face, maybe even pushing you down a little bit—or a lot!

I love to swallow. When a guy comes in my mouth, I know he’s lost control and it’s so hot, I just want to drink every drop.

This is the time when a number of things can happen. He is about to ejaculate, and it’s up to you where you want it to go—not only should it go where you want it, but he should come where and in whatever way turns you on. You could wait until the initial pulses and spasms begin, then pull back slightly as he comes on your tongue or lips. Or you might relish the taste and feel of him coming deep in your mouth or throat, swallowing it as he orgasms. Many people find it hot to have him come on their face, breasts, stomach, or hands, or into their open mouth, and even enjoy the association with porn’s “money shots,” finding that it adds to the heat of the encounter. If you hold your mouth still and close your throat, you can hold his come in your mouth and swallow it when the moment passes—or not. Pulling your head back and bringing him to orgasm with you hand is another option. Jack him off onto or into any area you want, and enjoy the show.