Diana Richardson - Tantric Sex for Men

performance. It is true that a bigger penis is able to cause more friction in the vagina, but a penis that

is big and hard can also be numb and insensitive in itself, as well as cause discomfort to a woman.

However, when there is a shift in our thinking about sex, we can begin to give value to our subtle

energy exchanges, which means that any size is perfect. Many men discover that their optimally

perceptive sensitive state is when the penis is only half erect. How you do something is much more

meaningful than what you do, or the size or rigidity of your sex organ. The penis is innately intelligent,

and if man is able to relax back into himself, nature will express itself through him.

PERSONAL SHARING

Focusing on the Inner Body

During the lovemaking retreat we repeated one exercise several times, which involved closing my eyes and focusing just

on the inner body (the home in my body) in order to feel a connection with my pelvis. It was always a beautiful experience

for me.

When I felt connected with myself, I slowly opened my eyes, still focusing on the inside, and slowly turned to my

partner, who had just done the same exercise. While slowly coming together in this manner, I was full of joy and love. I

realized that my penis stiffened and I wanted to share this pleasant feeling with my partner and rub my penis against her,

as I used to in the past.

However, this time I tried something new. I stayed with my feeling, sensed my penis from inside, and experienced a

strange energy filling my body and rising to my heart. This wonderful connection, this streaming of energy from my penis

to my heart, was very fulfilling for me and left a deep impression. All this happened just because I was alert and

contained my feeling, and did not automatically project my feeling out of my own body.

PERSONAL SHARING

Swaying in a Tantric Dance

One sensation that came up again and again was of a kind of dance happening between penis and vagina. When I was

inside my wife, I perceived a soft motion between us—like leaves swaying gently in a warm breeze, or as if my penis were

surrounded by soft, warm liquid. Although seen from an outside perspective our bodies did not move, my motions were, in

fact, in harmony with her motions, and I felt deeply connected to my beloved in what felt like a dance between the female

and the male. As I remember this event, I wonder again about the untapped potential of our sexual organs. Tantra is a

true adventure to me. My perceptions during lovemaking have become more refined, diversified, and intense. This makes

lovemaking more touching, colorful, and deeply conscious for me, both physically and energetically.

I have a beautiful experience to share: One morning when we were making love and were inside of each other, I felt

as if my penis were surrounded by warm liquid honey. My wife’s vagina was soft and receptive, I was very present and

focused, and a common space formed between us, a healing space in which my masculinity encountered the femininity of

my beloved. Energetically there was just this one space, within which we could love each other in total freedom. After

some time we changed position, and my wife suddenly got aroused and had an orgasm. After that her vagina felt tense

and tight, and the space between us had disappeared.

PERSONAL SHARING

One with Myself and with My Lover

I’ve begun to notice the ability of my penis to stay erect without my being aroused. Previously erectness was inextricably

connected with arousal. I happen to see a sexy woman, and poing—my penis gets stiff. My wife touches my penis—poing.

But now the poing happens without any arousal, but only if we are inside of each other and I am present, focused, and

relaxed. There are two factors that make it extra easy: If my lover is also present and if I am deeply in her vagina. Most

of those times I feel a strong energy flow within myself and between us. Everything around us becomes unimportant, and I

am one with myself and my lover. I feel held, loved, and simply at home in myself and in everything that is.

Tantric Inspiration

Remain with the beginning; do not move to the end. How to remain in the beginning? Many things are to be

remembered. First, don’t take the sex act as a way of going anywhere. Don’t take it as a means: it is the end in

itself. There is no end to it; it is not a means. Secondly, do not think of the future; remain with the present. And if

you cannot remain in the present in the beginning part of the sex act, then you can never remain in the present—

because the very nature of the act is such that you are thrown into the present.

Remain in the present. Enjoy the meeting of two bodies, two souls, and merge into each other, melt into each

other. Forget that you are going anywhere. Remain in the moment going nowhere, and melt. Warmth, love, should be

made a situation for two persons to melt into each other. That is why, if there is no love, the sex act is a hurried act.

You are using the other; the other is just a means. And the other is using you. You are exploiting each other, not

merging into each other. With love you can merge. This merging in the beginning will give you many new insights.

If you are not in a hurry to finish the act, the act, by and by, becomes less and less sexual and more and more

spiritual. Sex organs also melt into each other. A deep silent communion happens between two body energies, and

then you can remain for hours together. This togetherness moves deeper and deeper as time passes. But don’t think.

Remain with the moment deeply merged. It becomes an ecstasy, a samadhi, cosmic consciousness. And if you can

know this, if you can feel and realize this, your sexual mind will become nonsexual.

OSHO, TRANSCRIBED TEACHINGS,

VIGYAN BHAIRAV TANTRA

6

AWARENESS, MOVEMENT, PENETRATION, AND

ERECTION

AWARENESS

The expression “It’s not what you do, but how you do it” is more deeply understood through these

simple yet profound words of Osho: “Tantra is the transformation of sex into love through

awareness.” These few words encapsulate the essence of tantra, which is about awareness—nothing

more, nothing less. If we are aware and conscious during sex, sex transforms into love. Awareness

changes the whole quality of sex, and the fragrance and climate of love is naturally generated through

awareness. Woman’s heart and body respond vibrantly to man rooted in the present through his

awareness.

Staying Present within the Body

The elusive present moment is created through bringing awareness to the body, holding the attention

in the body, millisecond by millisecond. Being aware of body position, movements, and breath and

relaxing habitual tensions are basic tools to accessing and staying in the present. The body always

exists in the present; it is the mind that roams around in past and future thoughts. Before a man can

understand how to remain present while making love with a woman, he must first establish a