Mian Mian - Candy (chinese)

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Candy (chinese): краткое содержание, описание и аннотация

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An international literary phenomenon-now available for the first time in English translation-Candy is a hip, harrowing tale of risk and desire, the story of a young Chinese woman forging a life for herself in a world seemingly devoid of guidelines. Hong, who narrates the novel, and whose life in many ways parallels the author''s own, drops out of high school and runs away at age 17 to the frontier city of Shenzen. As Hong navigates the temptations of the city, she quickly falls in love with a young musician and together they dive into a cruel netherworld of alcohol, drugs, and excess, a life that fails to satisfy Hong''s craving for an authentic self, and for a love that will define her. This startling and subversive novel is a blast of sex, drugs, and rock ''n'' roll that opens up to us a modern China we''ve never seen before. – Banned in China -with Mian Mian labeled the ''poster child for spiritual pollution''-CANDY still managed to sell 60,000 copies, as well as countless additional copies in pirated editions. – CANDY has been published in eight countries to date and has become a bestseller in France.
***
Sex, drugs, and rock 'n roll: ingredients for novels about modern China? Yes, SHANGHAI BABY by Wei Hui (Pocket Books, 2001) showed international readers modern Chinese youth were not immune to the running dogs of Western decadence: Globalization might even include mixing with dissolute foreigners. Following SHANGHAI BABY to English by a few years, Mian Mian now suggests with CANDY the decadence is more likely homegrown, possibly an inevitable side-effect of China's ascension to manufacturing colossus for the world. After this first novel by Shanghainese Mian was banned in China -an "honor" Wei Hui also earned – she was labelled a "poster child for spiritual pollution."
The buzz made CANDY an underground bestseller.
Whether Mian Mian harvested autobiographical details for her protagonist Hong's drug-plagued odyssey is open to question. She prefaces the novel with a note: "This book exists because one morning as the sun was coming up I told myself that I had to swallow up all of the fear and garbage around me, and once it was inside me I had to transform it all into candy. Because I know you all will be able to love me for it."
In a larger context, Hong's story, the characters in her life, often resonate with American stories we've heard of the Old West and Gold Rush days (whether in California or Alaska). She leaves Shanghai to seek her future in the new frontier of the Special Economic Zones the Chinese government created along the south coast in the 1980s, near Guangzhou. Not only did the SEZs permit a laissez faire approach to business-much of the Confucian social rules that apply elsewhere are ignored. In the SEZ thick with fortune seekers and finders, prostitution flourishes, as does alcohol and drug addiction.
Hong, only 17, has dropped out of a competitive high school, somewhat dispirited by the suicide of a classmate (an echo of Murakami's NORWEGIAN WOOD), when she leaves for the south. There she meets a young musician Saining and they become lovers, so often hopeless for each other and so often hopeless for their addictions. They survive, slacker-style, largely by the generosity of Saining's mom, who lives in Japan.
Hong's love for Saining has compelling moments of violence, promiscuity, and druggy indifference. But the greatest achievement of Hong's story, perhaps, is the honest testimony to the erasure of desire, the great sucking away of soul only addiction can wreak on a love that nonetheless won't go away. From a null point, from a Murakami-esque death in life, Hong goes on to find redemption can be hers.This stark portrait is not without lighter moments. For example, Hong's friend Bug is convinced he has AIDS. The horror of that discovery is brought alive. Page after page: consultation with friends, plans to leave the country, examination by a Beijing AIDS specialist. Finally, the revelation too many OTC drugs to get high had caused the troubling symptoms.
Like Murakami's post-consumerist young generation in Japan, Mian Mian suggests the same search for individual authenticity is underway in China. As China 's economic engine gains force, so does disillusionment among the young with the old ways. Hong suggests her ambivalence towards China 's rising star: "The moment the plane left the ground, I fucking burst into tears. I swore I would never come back to this town in the South again. This weird, plastic, bullshit Special Economic Zone, with all that pain and sadness, and the face of love, and the whole totally fucked-up world of heroin, and the late 1980s gold rush mentality, and all that pop music from Taiwan and Hong Kong. This place had all of the best and all of the worst. It had become my eternal nightmare." Hong awakes before the CANDY is gone. Mian's compassion for youth of New China elevates and brings irony to a story lesser writers might have passed off as sensation-ridden heroin chic.

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每天我有一些黄色的、粉红色的、白色的小药片。我吃了这些药没法睡觉,浑身发热,在房间里走来走去,有时还会一个人说话说个不停,额三倒四的。一个晚上,一个病人突然溜进我房间,她说如果想早点出去,黄药片别再吃了。我刚抬起头来她就不见了,她把我给吓着了,我哭了一场之后决定不吃黄色的那种药了,我跟医生说我不要吃黄药片。

在做了很多噩梦之后我又一次渐渐好起来,这一次我开始和她们一起劳动。一个病人教会我怎么做纸牌,我开始想我的妈妈,我想她做的菜,想她的一切。我每天和她们一起看着黑板唱歌。只是我仍!日没法忍受那些食物。每个月有一次午饭是红烧大肉,这是病人们最开心的时间。有个病人说你为什么不吃肉?你为什么不吃肉?这话被医生听见了,我的医生是个非常漂亮的上海女人,时髦的女知识分子。她说你为什么不吃这个肉?我说我恶心。真的 恶心。她说你以为你是谁?今天我要你把它吃下去。我说 我实在吃不下。她说你想不想早点出去?我说想。她说那 就吃下去。你和别的病人没什么两样,你要记住这点。我 说我不吃。她说那好我把你爸叫来,看你吃不吃。然后她看着我吃下了那块肉,又看着我一阵阵地呕吐了出来,我边吐边哭。她说你和别的病人是一样的,不要再让我看见你浪费。你上次给你看护的一百块钱被没收了你知道吗?你和别的病人没什么两样,而且你害得她永远不可以再做看护了,你要记住这点。

一个病人得了皮肤病,所以她不可以和我们一起劳动,她一个人坐在一张板凳上看着我们劳动。当我走过她身边的时候她问我你在外面是在哪里混的?我说什么?什么在哪里混的?你在哪里混的?她说我在JJ.迪斯科混的。然后她看着我,我一点也看不出她是个有病的人,但是她也有那种左右晃动身体并不停换左右脚的习惯。

又有一批吸毒者被警车送了进来,开始有点热闹了,她们是强制戒毒病人。一个病人有一次突然对我说你的血管太好了,一点问题没有,这一针打下去肯定很爽,突然又想到“你和别的病人没什么两样”这话,我躲回了房间。

快到年底了,病人们被一辆漂亮的旅游车接走去了一次浦东,回来以后,一个病人对我说你知道吗?外面现在很好啊!

圣诞节了,我们有了自己的晚会,一个病人吃了我的巧克力开始唱歌给大家听,她是这里唯一戴眼镜的病人,她唱的是那种唱诗班的圣诞歌,她的真假声混合非常自如,她的高音很美妙。她唱完后我问她你怎么会唱这些歌?她说我是个老师。我说你怎么会进来的?她说我杀了我的丈夫。我说你为什么杀你丈夫?她说老公长得太小,一掐就指死了。她说完这话,表情平静。

我开始恨我自己,我想海洛因把我脑子弄坏了,否则我怎么会认为自己有权利来这样问她们“为什么会进来”?

我发誓再也不会问这个问题了。

那天的集体大合唱是一首小情歌,几十个老女人大声唱着“让我想你想你想你,最后一次想你,因为明天我将成为别人的新娘,深深地把你想起。”歌声整齐,毫无感情,却真挚动人,触动我的心扉,我第一次找到了我的』乙。

在以后的日子,我经常和这首歌碰上,我知道了它的名字叫《心语》,每次相遇,我都突然崩溃,我会停下所有的动作把这首歌听完,这首歌提醒着我我从哪儿来。

圣诞节的第二天早上,我很早就醒了。一个病人到我房间里来把碗拿出去,她问我这么好的包子为什么不吃?她每天都会问我同样的问题,我每天都会回答我不吃你吃吧!这天我说完她就把我的碗拿了出去,然后再拿着拖把过来准备拖地,然后她突然就靠着墙口吐白沫缩成一团。我不敢喊,我看着她,我看着我的取暖器,我怕她会突然把取暖器向我砸来。护土小姐正好路过,我压低着嗓子说 你看,她这是怎么了?护土小姐进来后把拖把放在她手中 让她握住,然后对她说马上好了,没事,马上好了。几分 钟之后她就起来了,然后她继续开始拖地,她脸色苍白,头发像钢丝一样,我很想过去拖地,但我一动也不敢动。过了一回儿,护土小姐送来对我说她发病是因为她吃你的包子,每天吃你的包子,今天被别的病人集体批评,所以她发病了,以后如果你不吃你的包子,请轮流发给她们每个人。

快过元旦了,大家都打扮干净,因为探视的时间到了。一个病人和她的儿子一起吃蛋糕。一个病人和她丈夫在说话。一个病人和她妈妈在一起,她的妈妈老得不得了。一个病人在那里等着。我双手插在袖子里坐在床边,我的双脚左右晃动着,我看着我妈送来的巧克力,我妈只在我病房坐了10分钟,我妈说门卫很凶,门卫说对你们这种吸毒者没什么可看的,我妈说她感觉自己现在像个罪犯,所以她得快点出去,以免再次挨训。

出去的日子临近,我被放到大房子里和所有的病人一起睡觉,每天晚上她们会在梦里说话,我睡不着,总是饿,半夜起来啃饼干,一个病人在被子里看着我笑,她说我想不通你怎么会睡到这里来。

我回家了。我说我要洗澡,我太久没洗澡了。我说家里的浴室太冷,我怕冷,我要去公共浴室洗澡。我妈给了我一块钱,她说够了。我想她不敢给我多的钱,因为她怕我会去吸毒。

我回到了我的家乡,我来到了小时候经常到的公共浴室,我戴着我爸给我买的假发,我气喘嘘嘘地洗着澡,由于体力不支,假发掉了下来,有一个人先是看看我假发,再看看我毛绒绒的头,最后把目光停留在我身体上。

洗完澡出来我用两毛钱买了一块油炸雕饭糕,滚烫的耀饭粘在了我的牙上,我想这耀饭糕真香,而且这么便宜。我很高兴我再也不用吃康师傅和闲趣饼干了,我想我这辈子都不要再吃那些东西了。我想也许我的人生可以在这一刻重新开始,我想着我的家,我想现在我不会冷了,我想着刚刚离开的医院,我想现在我是唯-一个出来过年的病人,然后我告诉自己:真的,海洛因是超级垃圾。

I

玫瑰有刺,就像爱情。当玫瑰花瓣片片飘零,就

像是小寡妇的眼泪。这种如泣如诉的下雨的天气,敏感而不真实,它一直就和我有关。雨声无情地把我和这个世界隔离,空气中飘荡着我爱人的歌声我不能吻他了我不能求他了我不能谢他了。我看见自己的脸被埋在了一块大石头底下,而我是多么的想搬开那块大石头。

我的旧皮鞋被雨水泡得又大了一圈,我的脚在皮鞋里晃来晃去。我用烂皮鞋踢了踢唱机,唱机里的男人很资产阶级。我的唱机总是会走音,我的皮鞋也会有哮喘的时候。

今天,有人从南方带来了赛宁的死讯,这个没有证人的赛宁的死讯我该如何是好?那人要我挑选一首赛宁的作品入某张唱片,他说我们想纪念他,就由你来唱吧。

当我听到“纪念”这两个字特别想笑,我说赛宁是一首被歪曲的诗歌,也许我都不了解他,他脸上梦想的痕迹我无法模仿。

我没有告诉他我早已不能唱歌了,我也不听任何摇滚乐了。从戒毒所出来后,我买了一些新唱片,我刚知道有个KUR COBAIN,但他已经走了,他走了我很痛,但这并不代表我了解他,我不能再听这些新唱片了。三毛在酗酒,依然在歌厅卖唱赚钱,他只会欺负老婆,他老婆那么美,他老婆崇拜他,和我的狗当当一样忠实而瘦弱。越来越多的乐队,越来越多的PUNK,越来越多的演出,世界在变化,就像我的心中已不再有英雄,我已经有过我的崔健了,我是那个在崔健的歌声中出走的女孩,我至今都认为那是幸福的。关于蓝色的天空和痛苦到底有什么区别,我现在已经不去想了。

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