Ian Doescher - William Shakespeare's The Jedi Doth Return

Thy father? What base trick of Fate is this?

This news is but the prologue to the rest
That I shall tell thee, Leia. This shall not
Fall easily upon thine ears, but thou
Must hear’t: if I do not return, then thou
Shalt be the only hope for the Alliance.

Nay, say not so, dear Luke! Thou hast a pow’r
I do not comprehend, and never could
Obtain. ’Tis far beyond my skill and means.

But there thou art mistaken, Leia: thou
Dost have that pow’r within thee, and, in time,
Shall learn to use it as I have. The Force
Is strong and certain in my family.
My father has it, I have it as well,
And also doth my sister have it. Aye,
’Tis thee, dear Leia, sister of my soul.

[ aside: ] A brother! What strange circumstance is this?
My friend, this Luke, doth claim a brother’s place?
And is Darth Vader thus my father, too?
What of the father that I once did know—
Organa, he for whom I have been nam’d?
Shall I, now fully grown, begin anew
And learn to love another family?
I thought my kinfolk all had been dispatch’d
When Alderaan was cruelly destroy’d.
Yet Luke doth tell me that the man who stood
And watch’d with joy whilst Alderaan was blown
Apart is he whom I should “Father” call?
It shall take time and thought to reconcile
My heart unto this news. But with what joy
Already I do welcome Luke into
My life as brother—there I have no qualms,
For he hath been a brother unto me
Since first we met. A brother! O, what news!
[ To Luke: ] It is as if I did already know—
Within my heart ’tis like I’ve always known.

Then canst thou see why I must face him now?

Nay, that I cannot see. If he can feel
Thee here, then flee anon and save thy life!
It is no shame to fly from danger, Luke.
I wish that I could fly with thee.

—Nay, say
That not, for thou e’er wert the strongest one.

But wherefore needest thou confront him, Luke?

Methinks the man hath good within him still,
And shall not basely render his own son
Unto his cruel and vicious Emperor.
Methinks I still can save the man who gave
Us life, and turn him to the good once more.
Methinks I must endeavor so to do,
Or else my path is darker e’en than his.
Methinks so many things, dear Leia, but
The most important of them all is this:
My father is my duty to reclaim,
E’en though he has a vile existence led.
His heart, his soul, his life can be redeem’d,
’Tis now my mission and, I hope, thine too.
And now farewell, for I must take my leave.

O, what a noble mind is here reveal’d:
My brother young, yet speaking like a man
Imbu’d with ev’ry honorable trait.
To take upon himself the role of nurse
To heal our wayward, troubl’d father. Ah!
And I, of ladies most profoundly bless’d,
To have a brother such as this good Luke—
His swift return unto our loyal band
I shall with pride await. O joy is mine,
T’have seen what I have seen, see what I see!

What ails thee, Leia?

—Nothing, Han. I’ve grown
More full of deepest feeling than I e’er
Thought possible. I would remain alone
Till I have time to ponder this affair.

’Tis “nothing”? Prithee, tell me what is wrong.

Thou dost not see—I cannot tell thee yet.

But Luke, couldst thou tell Luke in whisper’d song?
Then shall I leave thee.

—O!
[Han Solo begins to leave, but then returns to Princess Leia.

—Beg pardon, pet.
Forgive this latest outburst of my pride,
I am but worried for thy state of mind.

Embrace me, Han, and here with me abide:
Thou art a man of substance, strong and kind.

Although thou causest me to fret and groan,
My love is thine and thou shalt ne’er be lone.

E’en now my son doth come to me, I feel’t.
Thus is the moment near when I bring him
Unto my Lord and, in so doing, bind
Together those two forces of my life:
My skillful son and my true Emperor.
The two become one: ’Tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish’d. I’ll see Luke turn’d
Toward the dark side of the Force, and we
Shall rule the galaxy—the father, son,
And mighty Emperor. O make it so,
Most slippery and cunning Fate, for great
Shall be the combination of our pow’rs.

My Lord, this is the rebel who did bring
Himself to us in full surrender. He
Denieth there are others here, yet I
Believe there may be more. I do request
Permission to conduct a search of the
Surrounding area. “No stone unturn’d,”
As my dear father us’d to say. Is not
A father’s wisdom precious more than gold?
But I digress: the rebel came here arm’d
With this and this alone, a lightsaber.

[ aside: ] O how it stirs my soul to hear him tell
The love of his good father. Now, be calm!
[ To commander: ] Thou hast fulfill’d thine office faithfully,
Commander. Leave us now, conduct thy search,
And bring this one’s companions back to me.
I’ll warrant thou shalt find them as thou think’st.

Of course, my Lord. My pleasure ’tis to see
Thy great will done. If further rebels are
Upon the moon, we shall discover them.

The Emperor hath been expecting thee.

[ aside: ] Now it begins. [ To Darth Vader: ] I know, my father.

—Ah,
Thou hast accepted what is true.

—I have
Accepted thou wert once call’d Anakin
Skywalker, and as such, my father wert,
And art, and whate’er come to pass, shall be.

That “Anakin” is meaningless to me.
The name hath neither relevance nor worth.
My life is chang’d, and I with it, fore’er.