Witi Ihimaera - Uncle's Story

Patty giggled and gave a mock salute. Anita gave a small scream and pointed across the floor — and the girls were off to where Cliff was standing with Bully and Jimbo. For a moment, Sam remembered Madame Godzilla’s bar. He caught Cliff’s attention and signed to him:

Haven’t we met before?

Cliff grinned back.

Are you coming on to me? If you are, I warn you, I never kiss on a first date.

The action song ended and there was loud applause. Sam realised that all attention was on Arapeta as he turned to George:

‘May I have your leave to have the first dance with your wife?’

Arapeta bowed to Emma and took her hand. He led her into the middle of the floor. The band began to play the ‘Fascination’ waltz, and, with a dignified gesture, Arapeta put his arms around Emma and swept her around the room. Immediately there was scattered applause, and Cliff was able to escape from Patty and the girls to join Sam. Together they watched Arapeta, medals resplendent, as much in command on the dance floor as he was in battle. Sam heard Cliff say to him:

‘Are you and your Dad okay?’

‘Yes. He didn’t really mean what he said back there in the dining hall.’

Cliff paused. Then:

‘Whether he did or not, Sam, I don’t like what he said — and I don’t like him. He uses fear to make people do what he wants. You, your mother, your whole family. Even though he’s your father, I’ll fight him if I have to. He’s a bully.’

‘Let’s not talk about Dad,’ Sam answered. His face was set with determination. ‘Let’s think about us —’

The waltz was over. Arapeta took Emma back to George, and with a sigh of relief the band started up again: this time, a hot rock ’n’ roll number. The women were kicking off their high heels, tucking their dresses into their pants and taking to the floor. Sam’s eyes were turbulent, smouldering.

‘Will you be ready to leave in, say, five minutes?’ he asked Cliff.

‘Leave?’ Cliff was trying not to swallow.

‘Yes,’ Sam said. ‘It’s time —’

Cliff stared at Sam.

‘Yahoo!’

But Patty was there, screaming above the melee.

‘Come and dance with me, Cliff! You promised me a dance —’

Cliff gestured helplessly at Sam.

‘Don’t you move! I’ll be back!’

He followed Patty onto the dance floor. He was in such a mood of elation that he couldn’t help it — from out of nowhere he conjured up a spin that made everyone yell with surprise.

‘Look at that Pakeha boy move!’

Next minute, Cliff was dancing so cool that everybody moved aside to watch him. Patty was obviously way drunk but Cliff made her look as if she was the greatest dancer on the floor. He spun her, controlled her and made her into a star. At the end of the bracket there were whistles and shouts, and Patty was over the moon with excitement.

‘Wow,’ Sam laughed when Cliff returned. ‘Who taught you to dance like that?’

Cliff exaggerated a yawn.

‘Mormon elders from Brigham Young University — and you’ve had your five minutes, so let’s get out of here.’

It was too late. Without Sam and Cliff knowing, Patty had run to the bandleader and whispered something in his ear. He took up the microphone.

‘Okay, everybody, we’re going to have a change of programme. Instead of another boring action song for George and Emma —’

People in the hall laughed and pretended to be insulted.

‘We’re going to have an item from our special guest from America. Put your hands together for Mr Cliff Harper!’

‘Oh, no,’ Cliff groaned. ‘What can I do?’

‘Can you sing a song? “Yankee Doodle Dandy” or something? How about the “Battle Hymn of the Republic”. Anything!’

All around the hall people were chanting, ‘Cliff, Cliff, we want Cliff!’

A gleam came into Cliff’s eyes. ‘Okay, I’ve remembered something I worked up at Junior College. Can you wait a few more minutes?’

‘I might start without you —’

Cliff was shy and handsome and he knew he couldn’t get out of it. He gave a gesture of good humour, walked over to the band and started to talk to them. The bandleader nodded and began to instruct his drummer and lead guitarist. Cliff took the floor.

‘You know, I’d much rather be flying a helicopter than doing something for you all,’ he began. ‘Flying a helicopter is something I know how to do well. However, seeing as I’m forced to do something, and thank you, Patty —’ Patty blushed and giggled ‘— there is a traditional American folk song that we like to sing at home in the States, something nice and slow. Lucky for me the band knows it, so —’

Cliff gave the nod to the lead guitarist who strummed a mean chord. With a sudden gesture, Cliff ran his fingers through his hair, releasing crackles and sparks of golden light. Then, with a hip-swivelling motion that sent everybody rolling as if they were skittles, he began:

‘Since my baby left me —’

Whop. Swivel. Hold that pose.

‘I found a new place to dwell —’

Bump. Grind. Swivel. Smile.

‘Down the end of Lonely Street

at Heartbreak Hotel —’

And all of a sudden the girls were screaming and the older generation were watching, mouths open, as Cliff swung into a routine that would have left Elvis for dead .

‘I’m so lonely, buh-huh-by —’

Crouch, shake, rattle, hiccup, rock.

‘I’m so loh-honh-nely —’

Playing up to Auntie Annie, pulling her onto the floor. Auntie Annie pretended to faint in his arms.

‘I’m so loh-honh-nely, I could die —’

Stunned, Sam watched as Cliff suddenly unbuttoned his white jacket and began to swing it in the air. When he let go of the coat it flew toward Patty and her friends — but it was Anita who caught it in a swoon. Winking at Sam, Cliff started taking off his bowtie, teasing the girls with it, and then throwing it at Patty — but this time Kara caught it. Slowly he began to unbutton his shirt.

‘Oh shit,’ Sam thought. He closed his eyes. ‘He’s not going to strip, is he?’

Sam peeked through his fingers. What a relief. It seemed Cliff had decided to unbutton only to the navel. He put his knees together, splayed his feet out as far as they could go, and was hip-hopping his way across to where Sam was.

‘Although it’s always crowded —’

Cliff’s voice was mean, raunchy and filled with sex. He was teasing Sam, playing with him.

‘You still can find some room —’

He spun away towards Florence and Arapeta, who were laughing at Cliff’s antics.

Suddenly, Arapeta’s face froze.

He saw a cord around Cliff’s neck. He caught a glimpse of something attached to it. The boy was wearing —

‘For broken-hearted lovers

to cry there in the gloom —’

Arapeta looked at Florence to ask if she had seen the hei tiki. Her eyes were wide with terror and she stepped back from him. Without thinking, she glanced across at Sam, as if to warn him.

‘Oh, you fool, Sam. You fool —’

In that single glance, Arapeta saw Sam’s secret.

‘They’re so lonely buh-huh-by, so lonely —’

Sam roared with the crowd as Cliff, with a run, went down on his knees and slid all the way back across the floor to Patty, pretending to sob. Sam saw his mother’s face and it was wan and frightened. She was making pointing movements and, when he followed them, he saw Dad moving through the crowd as if he was stalking something. Or somebody.

‘So loh-honh-nely, they could die —’

The band went into an orchestral riff. All around, people were screaming and laughing. God, that was a white boy out there and he could sure sing!

Sam saw Dad pushing to the front, to where Patty was. Arapeta’s eyes were bulging, and the veins were standing out from his neck. Sam didn’t know what was happening — that Arapeta had seen a hei tiki ablaze on Cliff’s chest: