Kazuo Ishiguro - Nocturnes - five stories of music and nightfall

“I’m asking you to deal with this, Bradley. Okay, I’m in deep, I’ve had the surgery, you talked me into it, because I was fool enough to believe what you said. But I don’t have to put up with this. I don’t have to spend the next two weeks with Lindy Gardner. I’m asking you to get me moved pronto!”

“I’m not getting you moved anywhere. Do you realise how important a person Lindy Gardner is? You know the kind of people she’s pals with? What she could do for you with one phone call? Okay, she’s divorced from Tony Gardner now. That doesn’t change a thing. Get her on your team, get your new face, doors will open. It’ll be big league, five seconds flat.”

“It won’t be big-league anything, Bradley, because I’m not going over there again, and I don’t want any doors opening for me other than ones that open because of my music. And I don’t believe what you said before, I don’t believe this crap about a scheme…”

“I don’t think you should be expressing yourself so emphatically. I’m very concerned about those stitches…”

“Bradley, very soon you won’t have to be concerned about my stitches at all, because you know what? I’m going to pull off this mummy mask and I’m going to put my fingers into the corners of my mouth and yank my face into every kind of stretchy combination possible! Do you hear me, Bradley?”

I heard him sigh. Then he said: “Okay, calm down. Just calm down. You’ve been under a lot of stress lately. It’s understandable. If you don’t want to see Lindy right now, if you want to let gold go floating by, okay, I understand your position. But be polite, okay? Make a good excuse. Don’t burn any bridges.”

I FELT A LOT better after this talk with Bradley, and had a reasonably contented evening, watching half a movie, then listening to Bill Evans. The next morning after breakfast, Dr. Boris came in with two nurses, seemed satisfied and left. A little later, around eleven, I had a visitor-a drummer called Lee who I’d played with in a house band in San Diego a few years ago. Bradley, who’s also Lee’s manager, had suggested he come by.

Lee’s okay and I was pleased to see him. He stayed for an hour or so, and we swapped news of mutual friends, who was in which band, who’d packed their bags and gone to Canada or to Europe.

“It’s too bad how so many of the old team aren’t around any more,” he said. “You have great times together, next thing you don’t know where they are.”

He told me about his recent gigs, and we laughed over some memories from our San Diego days. Then towards the end of his visit, he said:

“And what about Jake Marvell? What do you make of it? Strange world, ain’t it?”

“It’s strange all right,” I said. “But then again, Jake was always a good musician. He deserves what he’s getting.”

“Yeah, but it’s strange. Remember how Jake was back then? In San Diego? Steve, you could have blown him off the stage every night of the week. And now look at him. Is that just luck or what?”

“Jake was always a nice guy,” I said. “And as far as I’m concerned, it’s good to see any sax player getting recognition.”

“Recognition’s right,” Lee said. “And right here in this hotel too. Let me see, I’ve got it here.” He rummaged in his bag and produced a tattered copy of LA Weekly . “Yeah, here it is. The Simon and Wesbury Music Awards. Jazz Musician of the Year. Jake Marvell. Let’s see, when is this fucker? Tomorrow down in the ballroom. You could take a stroll down those stairs and attend the ceremony.” He put down the paper and shook his head. “Jake Marvell. Jazz Musician of the Year. Who’d have thought it, eh, Steve?”

“I guess I won’t make it downstairs,” I said. “But I’ll remember to raise a glass to him.”

“Jake Marvell. Boy, is this a screwed-up world or what?”

ABOUT AN HOUR AFTER LUNCH, the phone rang and it was Lindy.

“The chess set’s all laid out, sweetie,” she said. “You ready to play? Don’t say no, I’m going crazy here with boredom. Oh, and don’t forget now, bring those CDs. I’m just dying to hear your playing.”

I put down the phone, then sat on the edge of the bed trying to figure out how it was I hadn’t stood my ground better. In fact, I hadn’t put up even a hint of a “no.” Maybe it was plain spinelessness. Or maybe I’d taken on board much more of Bradley’s argument on the phone than I’d admitted. But now there wasn’t time to think about it, because I had to decide which of my CDs were most likely to impress her. The more avant-garde stuff was definitely out, as was the stuff I’d recorded with the electro-funk guys in San Francisco last year. In the end, I chose just the one CD, changed into a fresh shirt, put my dressing gown back over the top and went next door.

SHE TOO HAD ON a dressing gown, but it was the kind she could have worn to a movie premiere without too much embarrassment. Sure enough, the chess set was there on the low glass table, and we sat down on opposite sides like before and began a game. Maybe because we had something to do with our hands, things felt much more relaxed than the last time. As we played, we found ourselves talking about this and that: TV shows, her favourite European cities, Chinese food. There was far less name-dropping this time round, and she seemed much calmer. At one point she said:

“You know what I do to stop myself going crazy in this place? My big secret? I’ll tell you, but not a word, not even to Gracie, promise? What I do is go out for midnight walks. Just inside this building, but it’s so vast you can walk around forever. And in the dead of night, it’s amazing. Last night I was out there maybe a whole hour? You have to be careful, there’s still staff roving around all the time, but I’ve never been caught. I hear anything at all, I run away and hide somewhere. Once these cleaning guys saw me for a second, but like that I was away into the shadows! It’s so exciting. All day you’re this prisoner, then it’s like you’re completely free, it’s truly wonderful. I’m gonna take you with me some night, sweetie. I’ll show you great things. The bars, the restaurants, conference rooms. Wonderful ballroom. And there’s no one there, everything’s just dark and empty. And I discovered the most fantastic place, a kind of penthouse, I think it’s gonna be a presidential suite? They’re halfway through building it, but I found it and I was able to walk right in, and I stayed there, twenty minutes, half an hour, just thinking things over. Hey, Steve, is this right? I can do this and take your queen?”

“Oh. Yeah, I guess so. I didn’t see that. Hey, Lindy, you’re a lot smarter at this than you let on. Now what am I supposed to do?”

“All right, I tell you what. Since you’re the guest, and you were obviously distracted by what I was saying, I’m gonna pretend I never saw it. Isn’t that nice of me? Say, Steve, I can’t remember if I asked you this before. You’re married, right?”

“That’s right.”

“So what does she think of all this? I mean, this isn’t cheap. Quite a few pairs of shoes she could buy with this kind of money.”

“She’s okay about it. In fact, this was her idea in the first place. Look who’s not paying attention now.”

“Oh hell. I’m such a lousy player anyway. Say, I don’t mean to be nosy, but does she come visit you much?”

“Actually she hasn’t been here at all. But that was always the understanding we had, before I came in here.”

“Yeah?”

She seemed puzzled so I said: “It might sound odd, I know, but that’s the way we wanted to do it.”

“Right.” Then after a while she said: “So does that mean no one comes to visit you here?”