William Gaddis - J R

— Mister Glancy’s not in today and you can do your homework the way everyone else does it, with a pencil, now get to class or wherever you’re supposed to be and, and look out there, you’re dropping that whole pile of ahm, Dan if you’re going you might ahm, if you see Mister Gibbs in the halls anywhere you might tell him I’d like to see him as soon as he ahm, he can…

And out under the benign reproof in the fixed gaze from the wall they moved at home through crowd and noise, the one pursued by admiring gasps toward east seven, the other abruptly submerged half down the range of lockers to tuck a shoelace and surface to a stride that brought the coins bulging one pocket to a heavy clank each step toward the telephone booth as a clock beyond disposed of the hour with a click and the doors clattered closed on him with the second ring. — Hullo…? chin sunk deep as though seeking cords down toward the spleen somewhere, hand mounting handkerchief wad, pencil stub, tugging the torn zipper on the portfolio balanced as a lap desk — this is him speaking… handkerchief wad firmly in the mouthpiece, — is this here Mister Wiles…? Yes how much could you get me… at what? Holy… no that’s okay go ahead and get it, I just wondered why this Eagle stock is so… no just the common I already got rid of the other, hey I wanted to ask you about this stuff you sent me on these here nursing homes, this… what? No, no I can hear you fine, wait… he loosened the handkerchief wad, — now can you hear me better? We’re always having trouble on these lines, I know, listen I… what? What paper, today’s? No I… No just these Series? and Series? debentures, they already… what? What…? No but what do you mean the whole thing, the whole thing? But holy… no but holy… What? No but wait a second you just said Alberta and… no I know it but what’s Ace Development got to do with Al… What do you mean, the both of them? But holy… No but holy… No but this here Mister Decker which was the underwriter, he… What, like when the interest was due on this here Series B he put out the Series C and used that money to pay off the… No but like the price of the Ace stock just went up so how come he wanted to merge it with Alberta and Western if they were like already losing ten thousand dollars a… oh you mean that’s why it went up? No but first I have to talk to this here lawyer, I… what? No I know it’s a bad connection, I said I have to talk to our attorney first but see if you could look up this company called X–L Lithography at Ohio or someplace, find what their… No I said Ohio, find their book value and their dividends and all, I’ve got somebody waiting to see me… and the door cracked with the cropped head pressed against the outside glass, — the what? Oh that nursing home thing, is that how you pronounce it? No I said I got the stuff you sent me that is to say but I’ll call you later… and the door clattered as far open as the lap desk allowed.

— What are you doing?

— What does it look like, I’m talking on the telephone.

— You better hurry up, Mrs Joubert’s going to…

— Look hey tell her I had to go see the nurse okay?

— Okay, you going to the Post Office after? Boy wait till you see what I’m getting hey.

— We can go over at gym, hey and tell Mrs Joubert I went to see Miss Waddams okay…? and the door shuddered closed on him writhing for the depths of a pocket, stacking coins to size, the black nail crescent in the dial, the coin drop and chin dropped deep, — Hullo? Virginia? This is… J R yes I just called to see who called, is Mister Bast there…? and a fitful silence, hunched for a thumb to reach a nostril. — He’s not? Okay then who… which one…? No see there’s this one named Bunky which I don’t want to talk to him but the… yes the old one, no I know the number, it… No I know it’s long distance, who else? Who…? Moon like in moon you mean? e, y, h, Mooneyham? holy… no just what’s the number… and the pencil stub worked… — okay and who…? Yeah Mister Crawley, what did he just have some wisecrack to make about Alberta and… no sure tell him I already knew it, he thinks he’s so… Of what? n, o, b, what is it Italian? No I’ll have Mister Bast look into it, at thirty-eight he said…? No but tell Mister Bast to call me at this here new branch number collect at two fifty… no that means ten of three exactly tell him it’s urgent, he… Okay I know so when he comes in tell him I said he should pay you… no sure in cash I know, sure… no sure I know what it’s like, sure… and a sharp crack at the glass shot a line down it. The door clattered open. — Holy shit hey what are you trying to do, you cracked the glass.

— Come on hey help me out… the jar that had cracked the glass was thrust inside. — A quarter hey, Miss Waddams is waiting, I even had to snitch another bottle.

— What do you mean, right in here? Go find…

— No come on, there’s nobody hey, look I’ll stand right…

— Look I already went, find Anthony.

— I already found him, he’s all out. Thirty cents hey?

— I told you I already went… and the door clattered closed on the turning dial, the succession of quarters raised to the slot, sneaker wedged high against a hinge, finally — Mister Hopper please, this… No not him, the old one… Hullo? Mister Hopper? This is… yes, you recodnized my voice…? No my secretary just told me you called, is there… No sure I can hear you okay, we been having trouble with the connections from this… what? No our mail didn’t come in yet today, what… No well that’s too bad, I… Yeah well that’s too bad but… No well I mean I’m sorry these hometown Eagles lost this here game but when the… No but when the Weekly Messenger says it’s because they lost their home field see I think that’s just this attempt to embarrass you Mister Hopper since the bank’s taking it over in this here leaseback deal we… No but see in terms of this here loan to Eagle management, we… senior management yes see we… Yes me and Mister Bast that is to say, see we… the what? No well like the status like you call it of this Eagle pension fund buying this here stock in Wonder is… this here brewery yes, they make… Yes no I’m sorry Mrs Begg doesn’t think that’s exactly the kind of investment we… no I know she’s this stockholder but… No but like me and Mister Bast we’re neither of us a drinking man so why she thought he looked like he… what…? No but like being this here banker Mister Hopper you can look at it better in terms of the profit picture instead of just what they make at this here brewery that is to say, am I right? Oh and hey I meant to ask you… what? I said say I meant to ask you you know that there big track of land with the railroad tracks which we just found Eagle owns this big right of way around that big cemetery so I was talking to our attorney about… no about the cemetery see we… What, the cemetery? belongs to what…? The Ancient and Loyal Order of what…? Honest? of which you’re the Grand what…? Honest? Sure no but I mean what would we do with a cem… No but what… No but sure I mean we don’t want this lawsuit with this here Ancient and Loyal Order and all, like if we… How many…? Holy, I mean this here Order must be tremendous, do they all come there to… No I said like are they mostly old…? Oh you mean like from the whole countryside up there who… No so okay so while we’re waiting for this loan to management maybe we can just settle this here lawsuit, you understand what I mean…? No I mean like on a friendly basis once this here loan is… No I know you can’t hear me very good so anyway what I’ll do I’ll talk to our attorney and have him write you the whole deal so we can… No that’s our accountant, our lawyer is this Mister Piscator, he already wrote you about all the… no Pis cator, pis… That’s him yes, Arnold, so anyway I’ll discuss it like with Mister Bast and then he’ll write you the whole… who, Bast? No I don’t think he’ll be up there again that quick, see he’s been real busy with… No I know, you really wouldn’t think so because he’s… I know we’re real lucky to have him with us because like everybody always seems to like him because he’s… Yes and he told me all about this neat time he had up there and… what? I said he told me how you arranged this here banquet and took him to these baseball games and all and he really… Sure well I’d like to once we get some of these hard driving demands of business done but, yes I have to go now… A sling paused at the glass, flapped dispiritedly, eyes peered over gauze and were gone. — No I said I’d like to sure but I… No I have this meeting yes… and one hand scooping the stacked coins into the other, the foot down from the hinge and the pile of books, papers and that battered portfolio pulled together, the door came open slowly and he looked one way up the corridor and back before the silent tread of his sneakers got him to the culvert of the door marked Boys to watch sling and billowing step reappear, pause again at the booth to shake it open on the first ring and get the phone with a free hand on the second.