William Gaddis - J R

— Well sure I, I mean that’s neat thank you, that’s neat…

— It’s certainly not neat but it’s a little neater than the one you’re giving up, so you don’t have to thank me.

— No but, but I mean people don’t usually give me things, you know?

Gibbs stopped the door, staring at him there, and then he cleared his throat — well, well then, you’re welcome…

— And hey Mister Gibbs? came back as the door shuddered, — Mister Whiteback wants to see you when you can he said, I just heard him tell…

— Thanks, Gibbs muttered, a hand already on the phone as it rang. — Hello…? But the… now wait a minute operator, I can’t owe you twenty cents overtime I haven’t even dialed yet, how can… No listen, I have an important call to make and I… well all right God damn it here’s your twenty cents, will you… Well why not, is… All right all right listen, you’ve got your twenty cents, now will you just give me a dial… to where? Listen operator don’t… no but listen don’t press your good fortune, I did not make a call to Union Falls earlier, I’ve never made a call to Union Falls, operator you may find this difficult to believe but I’ve never heard of Union… no now look operator if you’ll just give me a dial tone so I can… Jesus…! his hand rose to dial, to drop coins — yes, is Ben… Ben? Yes listen, I… no listen that’s what I called about, this God damned comic strip out here’s getting closer to the last episode and I’ve got to have that thing settled before I… well I know she does God damn it that’s the whole point a lump settlement like she says she… No I’ve already done it that’s what I called to tell you, I sent her all I… Cash? forget who you’re talking to? it’s stock in a broken down company I used to work for, five shares of General… Christ no it may not be worth anything but it’s the only God damned thing I had that might be worth anything and I… No in a drawer under some shirts, it’s an old family owned company that used to make piano rolls now they… because there’s no way to find out, the whole thing is tangled up in an estate squabble I’m not going to waste time trying to… No I knew you’d say that and that’s why I did it before I called you, because I’ve been waiting for advice getting advice listening to advice for, for how God damned long and I’m right where I started… with her? No, no the last time I tried she said they had to go to the dentist, she wouldn’t even let me talk to her on the phone and when I… I don’t know, that broken down book salesman probably still hanging around but… Look Ben the son of a bitch looks like he came out from under a rock, do you think I relish the thought of him answering the door when I come to see my… No Christ no they deserve each other but my daughter, to see my own daughter do you think I… Yes and this has nothing to do with that, do you think she spends that support on the girl? God damn it Ben if I hadn’t just bought her a ninety dollar winter coat she wouldn’t have one and I’m sitting here in a suit I paid two dollars for, now what do you… at a thrift shop where the hell do you think! now what do you… Of course I do, I wrote something on the back of the stock certificate subject to visiting rights and that’s the only… No but I want to be the one to decide, can’t you understand that? I want to be the one to decide! can’t you… Well it’s too late for that now, I just… no just being led around like that with a God damned ring in my nose, goodbye. Let me know when you hear from her lawyer… and half a minute, a minute passed silent before the door shuddered open and he came up the bank of lockers with hardly a glance for the casualty emerging from the door marked Principal which he banged again as he entered.

— Oh is that ahm, Leroy is that you out there? Yes come in I ahm, oh it’s you Gibbs yes come in…

— You’re sure I’m safe?

— Yes well of course ahm, safe?

— Apparition going out the door there bandaged from head to foot, I thought it might have been an applicant for one of your car loans.

— Yes well I suppose he ahm, yes well I hadn’t thought of that of course but since his car was totally ahm, I suppose Mister Hyde will be looking around for a new one that is to say…

— Hyde? That was Hyde?

— Well yes he ahm, yes I thought you might have heard he was in ahm, excuse me, hello…? Oh yes well Mister Pecci left yes… yes well no he was but he left… the bank? Oh well yes this is the bank ahm, telephone that is to say, yes…? Oh it is? Yes well of course I have no way of knowing Mister Pecci’s connection with ahm, any arrangement he may have with County Land and Title that is to say he ahm… and Peretti yes but of course Mister Pecci is… yes I’m sure you can yes, yes goodbye… Yes I’m sorry Mister Gibbs that was ahm, you were talking about a car loan yes but of course your salary is ahm, of course we know your salary that is to ahm…

— to all go shit in your hats…

— Look let’s not go into it, your other phone’s off the hook there I can see you’re busy, if there’s nothing else…

— Oh, oh yes that’s Mister ahm, yes just leaving a message and I think he’s made himself quite clear so it really isn’t ahm… and he restored the phone, — but while you’re right here there was something I meant to ahm…

— Probably our proscribed opening this morning, next time I thought we could get through the Amendments.

— Yes well of course how many ahm, in terms of length that is to say because our scheduling situation is somewhat ahm, two hundred and four feet I think someone said this morning and of course in terms of, yes excuse me, hello…? The newspaper, yes we saw the… oh you mean this is the newspaper calling?

— Mind if I turn this sound up a little? Hear what’s happening to our share in America…

— accept the tender offer of twenty-four dollars? If we do, we simply sign here and send this with our share to the City National Bank which is acting as… yes? Yes, the transfer agent. Of course nothing forces us to accept the…

— Yes well of course implementing the new drug detection program is providing a meaningful insight into the students ahm, body, the student body’s ahm… urine yes, urine tests under the school nurse who, yes no by the school nurse that is to… yes yes very successful, no cases have been reported at all since the detection program went into ahm… Yes of course because without popular support we don’t have the ahm, the support of the community that is to, yes I have another call yes, goodbye… Yes, hello…? Oh yes, no he… no no Mister Glancy’s out today yes he… No we haven’t, no we… Yes I’ll tell him, yes… Yes that’s what it was Gibbs Mister ahm, Glancy seems to be out today and I wondered if you…

— Can’t help you Whiteback, I wouldn’t know where he…

— No that wasn’t what I ahm, yes just a minute excuse me, hello?

— goes through, it would be worth one third of a share of Typhon International, the company making the tender, so we…

— I’ll stop by later Whiteback, I…

— No no just a minute, yes…? No I heard you yes, yes the bank examiner just called but all he… no well simply because the name Janice ahm, her name appears in a list of the bank’s stockholders is no reason to ahm… Yes well no, no they may not even be aware that he’s sponsoring the legislation to protect suburban banks in this ahm, in the suburbs that is to say, no they simply asked about his position with ahm, any interest he might have in County Land and… Yes well the mortgage insurance of course after the allegahm, inferences in today’s paper but ahm, yes I have someone with me right now that is to say and… yes, later yes…