William Gaddis - J R

— Hello…? It’s what operator…? No but I haven’t talked any overtime, I haven’t even… No I didn’t even, I don’t even know anybody in Union Falls and I… But I don’t have sixty cents, even wait wait wait, operator? Operator I wanted to call New York and I just happened to pick up the… but I can’t dial again I just, I don’t have the right change, since you’re right there could you… No it’s collect, yes… and the door clattered closed on the number, — Yes say it’s Mister diCephalis calling in answer to… yes, d, i, capital C, e… no small d, it’s… what? No wait, wait, then let me give you a number they’ll… my number yes, it’s zero, zero, six dash… No it’s not a telephone number no, it’s my coded… No they’ll understand, it’s my coded… hello? Operator? hello…? hello…? and the door struggled slowly open, to clatter closed a minute later on the pile gripped tottering on a knee and that hand rising to drop coins, stack them, knot the handkerchief as the other dialed and dropped to distribute office requisites.

— Hullo? Let me talk to Mister Piscator please, this… yeah this is J… Yeah this is him, I sound like I’m where…? Tell him that yes tell him that’s why I’m in a hurry because I… hello? Nonny? look, I just talked to this broker Mister Wiles about this whole Ace and Alberta… what? No didn’t she just tell you…? No well some of these overseas connections are real good but… no I can hear you fine, look I called you to… No well that’s what I called about, ljust heard the whole thing went… Okay but where does that leave me? I mean if I was the biggest holder they had in both… what? I already told you because it was real cheap, now so where does this… possible what…? But what good are leases on mineral exploration rights if I… okay but what good are tax write-offs for mineral exploration if like what am I supposed to do, go out there with a hat and a shovel looking… not a hatful of no I said a shovel and go looking for these here virgin… what? No I mean these minerals what’s the difference of that and you said probably all Alberta and Western has left is this bunch of rights of way and leases to… No I know I can’t so look, when you find it all out you can… no now can you hear me? I said tell Mister Bast. Did he call you yet about… No I know it but see he’s been doing a lot of reading up on all this and he… No, sure I know it’s inconvenient but see we’re changing that office up there over to these picturephones which the telephone company says they take longer to… No I know he doesn’t but see we’re still a little shorthanded down there too so Virginia’s been… Not down in Virginia, no I said Virginia the secre… no I know she’s not the brightest secre… No from Mister Bast, he was supposed to call you once him and Mister Wonder got together and got this whole deal all… No I know this other brother did but see I just got this call from this Mister Mooneyham at… he did? What did you tell him…? No but look see instead of just trying to get back that Wonder stock this brother loaned him as collateral for X–L suppose we just take over the whole… No but I just told this broker to get me the book value on it and all so see if we… Okay can you hear me? look, once the pension fund buys out Wonder it could just sell the stock right back and it would be overrefunded so… what? Overfunded I said yes so we’d never have to put anything in it again, see and then the… no back to the Wonder employees, see then the pension fund would be all set and these here Wonder employees would like own this stock of their own company and we get to keep this almost three million dollars of these unpaid dividends against Eagle’s tax loss credit carryforward understand what I mean? Which then instead of just trying to clear up that X–L thing we could move in and… what do you mean lose the brewery, we… Oh. Okay I didn’t think of that but look, if you think they might buy this stock and vote it to put up these new officers that would declare this big dividend and the whole thing would collapse, is that what you said? Okay then look, if we set them up this employees’ stock option plan where they buy this here stock but see we keep the voting rights so we can… What do you mean go to jail? why should… no now… no now look… No now look Nonny, see I’m not asking you what I can do, I’m telling you what I want to do and paying you to find out how I can do it, understand what I… what? No didn’t you get it yet…? No it’s coming to you from Eagle, I just talked to Mister Hopper up there and he said the check’s in the mail and look, he’s got this here old lawsuit up there about this cemetery which it’s right in the middle of this right of way, you can get the whole story on it later from Mister Bast see but the thing is settle it, see but… for anything just settle it, see but not till we have this okay on this here loan to management, I mean don’t make it sound like we’re holding out see but like it’s just this like regular thing you happened to… Sure I think you know your business or why would I… No there’s just a couple of things like this new issue on this string of these nursing homes that this broker sent me all the… No because it’s real cheap and then there’s some Italian drug company this other broker says is… no I didn’t look into them yet but look… A figure loomed in the glass panel over his shoulder, — look… he hunched lower, — I have this meeting I have to… what? Back in what country… Oh, oh sure tomorrow this was just this short… for this meeting yes, I… to incorporate what? Just a second… he cracked the door open, and over a shoulder — You need this here phone Mister Gibbs…? and at a nod, — okay just a second… and the crack closed, — sure go ahead then if you think that’s… In Jamaica? how come you… no I said go ahead, you can tell all this to Mister Bast when you and him… no well I just think he’s been too busy lately to get a new suit he… okay… and the door shuddered open. — Just a second Mister Gibbs, let me just get this stuff…

— No wait, wait looks like you might have change of a dollar there, I…

— Sure, quarters? Or no you need a dime here, three quarters and wait a second let me look at that nickel a second, I just… no it’s okay, here.

— Thanks… funny, I don’t seem to have a loose dollar.

— How come? you put on the wrong suit today?

— I suppose that’s a way of putting it yes, here…

— No that’s okay Mister Gibbs keep it, you can owe it to me okay? And he got upright with his armload, out of the booth. — Hey what happened to your shoe though, you hurt your foot?

— Gout.

— Honest? What’s that.

— Catch it from horses… he sagged into the booth, — and thanks for the loan.

— No that’s okay but, you okay Mister Gibbs?

— I don’t know why you’d think otherwise… and the door started closing — here wait, is this something of yours?

— What, I…

— It may even once have been a handkerchief, it…

— I forgot I, yes it’s…

— Just out of curiosity, could I ask why you have it knotted like this over the…

— Oh well sure see it’s, well see I always do that because like especially right now in the cold season Miss Waddams is always talking about you know? he bent in, freeing it. — There are all these germs probably on the telephone from everybody talking with their mouth right up to it see so…

— And that indescribable wad of, of cloth protects you from contamination?

— Yes well, see like it’s the only one I have see so…

— Then let me make you a gift… and the initialed square came unfurling from the breast pocket of the jacket, — on condition you drop that one in the first wastebasket you see.