Jonathan Cottam - The Urban Book of the Dead

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Urban Book of the dead is my second book to be published, after 'The Unrequited Zombie'. It is a rather less experimental work, though still unusual, vivid, and descriptive. I would describe the book as both psychedelic and surreal, being rather pedantic about the use of those two words. That is, if it were surreal I would be dealing with a psychological work, something that looked towards expanding knowledge of the Id, that primitive part of our nature that is repressed by social conventions and the need to plan to get what we want. It is, in that it is self gratifying without recourse to opinion, it is every animalistic urge that can only be released through art, because to do it any other way would have terrible repercussions. Having said that, next to my early work, it is not particularly arty or deep. It is psychedelic because it looks to reaching a higher consciousness by through creativity, to reach a state beyond the normal level of seeing things, it is also psychedelic and surreal in the commonly understood sense, it is 'trippy' and sometimes deals with drugs. It starts like this… "I floated above my body, I was a bubble fit to burst, I squeezed and struggled with my form, my clothes gripping and distorting my figure with their relative solidity, were the same ghost like material as the rest of me. Down below my face stared back at me; distorted and grotesque as the spirit shapes on the bark of trees, I felt my ghost face and it was etched there too, deforming me, chiselled by a million molecules of heroin, I had my wings, hung as from a pin, spread and feathered, and spanning the whole nicotine ceiling. I stared at the blue marbled arm; growing out like the gnarled branch of a tree, the fingers gesturing me towards it, and hanging from it, the syringe full of bubbles, blood and a quicksand of powdered death whirling like a vortex. A spoon lay on the floor and a small bit of cigarette filter in it, all having served a purely symbolic process. It seemed years of injecting powders and stuff flicked down to a dirty lemonade had paid off, perhaps a bubble could kill you after all." The book is I think taking one thing at least to a new level in literature, egomania. That is because the concept of the book is I the authors fight with god who is defeated, whilst at the same time dealing with my real life struggles as I go back through things that really actually happened to me in my drug filled and violent life as a drug dealer and through prison etcetera, and, changing them. I say egomania but again I mean the Id, the ego compromises, the Id does not. It is a very angry book because I am taking back the control that was taken from me, in that, to a very large extent I did not choose my life but it was forced on me, as with all the mishaps of all my dead friends who did not survive, through suicide, alcoholism, heroin overdose and murder. Enter God. God then is a symbol for society, capitalism, and the state, and also, plain bad luck. So is God then not God, is the book not satanic? My interest in black magic personally does not extend to believing in it, or God in any accepted sense either. I believe in magic as will, that Hitler could gain power through will is magic, that people can realise the future not through clairvoyance but precognition, taking in the world around them and understanding consciously or unconsciously where it is all going to lead, that kind of magic I believe, the other sort I only have a fair knowledge of as an interest and I am not a Satanist, that would be a misplacement of effort. "The noise got louder, but lower, rather than higher, so it travelled further and vibrated the walls. Crack's appeared in the walls in the form of a hundred distorted faces of people I had known, adventured and suffered with. A fragment of glass from a picture of 'Judith with the head of Hollerfernes' hit me in my eye, almost bursting my substance, which it settled in like a bloody monocle, magnifying the African tribal Fang mask in the centre of the wall, with its pale long wooden nose and owl like brow, its jutting chin; appeared to grow eyes that searched with the deepest hideous depth around my room and the dead body of me whose 'nakedness' I wanted to cover from the gaze. The mask bowed and came out of the wall, after it a huge body wearing the blue pinstripes of my wall paper and looking every bit the business man, come to settle my accounts, I was not about to make it easy. The scrambled voices became one, the word "Jonathan!" boomed. This was God, this was the confrontation I had been waiting for my whole life." The meaning of that is obvious in the pinstriped suit I think, but also a little later the meaning and symbolism is made totally obvious. "God spoke "I am the unity, I am the morals and the law, think like me and my triumphs will be your triumphs because there will be no difference, surrender all self generated thought of conflict, all difference is imaginary, it is not held and is alien to mind." I replied simply, my head turned to him from my place on the ceiling, "I am my desire." -A little later it gets really obvious. "With haste I flew forward and stabbed God in the eyes with my fingers, which flattened against the harder substance of Gods eyes, I cried out "This is for poverty, this is for the atomisation of life, this is for your prisons and the police, for all my friends who are lost yet alive, and all those you sent to hell which is a place on Earth. This is for everything." Soon events from the past unfold, and people I knew come into the picture such as Jay. Jay was a traveller; that is he moved from town to town, lived rough and begged. He had the unnerving attribute of being both friendly, warm, and a complete psychopath, loyal and perverse, he was a real good character for a book. I meet Jay again fishing in Hell. "I dropped my line in the molten lead from my rod. Immediately the rod bent almost double, despite its thickness. It pulled so hard I estimated that what ever was on the end must have been over two hundred pounds. I reeled in my rod and a giant fish splashed on the end of it, it looked like some kind of gigantic roach, its tail splashing molten lead at me as its body curved in the waves trying to get away. I landed the fish in the boat and it suffocated there its mouth open and body heaving, I marvelled at the square scales on its silver body, bigger than my hands. As I stood fascinated, the body of the fish, distorted as if something inside was trying to push its way out, a fist punched its way through, then two hands, pulled the fish apart, then before me was the crouched naked body of Jay, covered in a stinky fish slime, he held his nose and spoke nasally. "Hello Monster!" he said smoothly. Jay stood up tall, rocking only slightly; and threw chunks of fish in the water, now without the protection of its tough outer layers, the bits of fish flamed up as they entered the sea, with puffs of flame and billows of smoke. He held the rest of the carcass above his head, his arms at full length, and chucked that in after it; there was a huge flaming that threatened to engulf the boat, but it went out fast. I was pleased to see Jay, I had him picked out as my right hand man, there was something about him that persuaded you to trust him at the same time as acknowledging he wasn't entirely trust worthy, a slightly sly warmth, a look in the eyes that said he was tough and dependable, but somehow self centred. But, however he was useful, very handy; a good person to know. I asked a searching question. "How are you here? As far as I know you're still alive." Jay looked at me long and hard "Doesn't bloody look like it does it Monster. In Hell as well. What did I do to deserve that? A few fights, drug dealing, a couple of rich burglaries, fucking a tree on LSD, underage sex and a sexual assault in McDonalds that was nothing but feeling some ones leg, and I'm in Hell." Yes, he was really like that and he did all those things. The character of Jay is a rich part of the book, to which I am indebted to knowing him, not that many people will ever read it, but I live to write, quite literally. Another theme of the book is the yearning for togetherness, community, against the very real need for individuality, adventure and subjectivity. The two themes run through every religion, philosophy and form of politics to a varying degree of scientific application. It is not as simple as one or the other and both sides in the book take both approaches. There is no answer in human nature between the two, it is irreconcilable and all we can do is draw attention theoretically to the issue between fascism and anarchism, individuality and togetherness, though we do find more honest and liveable conditions in libertarianism than dictatorial politics. The problem between wanting togetherness and a shared identity, but being repulsed at having to give up subjectivity so pervades the book that many characters rebel against the human form, whilst not giving up the need for community, and become many headed monsters. But, the book insists, the need for adventure is the unifying theory that makes sense of our misery and creates a symbiosis between the conflicting forces. "As the ship rowed closer I realised it was the rule of these creatures, my brave men which is what they were, to reject the human form given by God for those of their own imagination, and to conjoin like the ultimate pack of animals, or; what I had seen in human riots when a crowd does indeed become a single and very different animal than the sum of its parts. I saw men who had formed their joints together to form the bodies of double kneed, twelve-foot men with two heads. Two had done that. The dragon with seven necks and six heads was also there, waiting in futility for my strange communion, for I was still attached to the human form, it still represented for me a thing of beauty and free autonomy." The book is all about conflict, but as Buddhists say, all conflict is imaginary, so I think, we are all in a state of symbiosis in a world where assistance between organisms is the norm even when it appears in the form of its opposite. That's all I want to say about the book.

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I looked at Satan diving up and down his six heads and shaking them and laughing, “Ha-ha!” the atmosphere changed amongst us, even on this arid planet full of pain I felt suddenly like the torturous heat the Sun inflicted was an over enthusiastic attempt at radiating happiness for us.

The head of Lucius spoke from the Satan collective “You remember your mates then! It’s more than I expected, much more, and your face so hardened, you’re magic must be mighty, it’s going to be a breeze this time around.” All the heads smiled together. All the heads smiled, not just those attached in the Satan collective.

There was a chorus of ayes from all and Colossus clapped me on the back with his muscular arm, I fell to the ground, it was a fall of a man falling into affection, beaten by affection.

I spoke “We have to move my friends” I tried to regain my breath from the clap and filled my lungs with hot, dry poisonous air, my choking became a laugh. “ohh-ha-ohh-ha. Jane; the Whore of Babylon’s alternate self is being held in a night club, a place of dancing, I need you to enter the front of the building and do not be distracted by the strange things you see, an army will be waiting in there. I will have to contact my spy before I appraise the situation much further, God thinks he has the ace in his dick pocket with Jane, and he has plans to weaken me, but that article may blow and flap back in our favour. There are about one hundred foot soldiers, they are poorly armed and are human, they have no magic and we might be able to take them out in fire before lifting a finger.”

I looked back for my Gollum. He was in trouble, big trouble, he was finished. His limbs were dismembered and strewn over the night club office floor. “Jon!” he called, “I couldn’t contact you, I’m finished, they know about the balloons, they’ve dismantled them, I’m dieing, I’m scared.”

“I’m so sorry Redd, you did a good job, well done, do they know about Jane?” as I spoke two bouncers in the room paced around, kicking his limp body distractedly when they came into contact, figuring he was already dead. Their backs were hunched and their arms out, taught muscles filled out the creases in their shirts, they were caged brutes, animals; with an animal smell sensed in Redd’s flat photo nostrils.

“No!” said Redd, but they are getting frisky, this walking around, it’s like they are building up sexual tension and they’ve been talking dirty about her, I’m fading, I’m sorry I won’t see how this ends, good bye.”

Redd was dead. I felt him die like an absence in my brain.

I told my comrades. “We should get back; time is short, Jane is in trouble and…” I looked at my watch with its round floppy steel face and urgent crooked hands ticking away our short minutes towards the reckoning; it was ten past twelve “We have a dead line”.

“Can you get us back?” asked my friends in the Satan amalgamation.

I nodded my head with certainty “It is going to be very easy. We have only a few minutes, we should go.”

With that I took us back to the rear of the night club, near the fire escape, we materialised into shocking cold air after Hell, I shook and shivered before I could take anything else in. Judith and Jay were already there, armed with zip guns and squeezy bottles of the hallucinogenic contact poison, I felt mine in my pocket. Judith was at the top of the fire escape I went up to talk to her as whispered introductions took place at the bottom. Judith waved her hand at me and then at my old comrades; she knew them all I figured. As I climbed I watched Jay shaking and nodding his head. Jay was chatting and listening, bending his ear cupped in his hand; his gesticulations loud and heavy to make up for the necessary quiet of his voice. He talked mostly to Paul whose face was warm, suggesting to me they liked each other.

At the top of the fire escape Judith beamed and smiled, she whispered, taking me in to her confidence “Look!” and pointed madly at her belly. The translucent red of her belly had stretched so large and tight I could see the growing baby curled inside. It was perfectly formed and developed, there was already a covering of hair on its head and a net work of veins enveloped and fed it. The face was the young face of an angel that looked painted on as though by Michelangelo. Judith whispered grabbing my hand quickly and tightly and smiling into my face “It’s a boy!”

I stroked Judith’s belly with fondness for her and the baby, a hybrid of two unique people was growing there. I said “You should go, you can’t be here.”

Judith replied with sternness written on her face “You need me and I will hear no more about it.”

At the bottom of the steps, Jay pointed around the front of the building and handed a watch of several on his wrist to Deus Ecstatic. The watch had been altered as part of his body, it gleamed silver and wriggled, from where I was I got the impression he was handing Deus a fish. Jay made his way up the steps and my comrades moved against the side wall for as much cover as their strange and frightening appearance would allow. They cast strange shadows on the bricks of the wall under a security light, the shadow of one giant predator, reaching up to the top of the three floor building and seemingly poised to pounce around the corner.

Jay climbed the steps cautiously and with a great ironic reluctance in his body and face, each step a forced and tentative stride covering three steps. He reached me and Judith and smiled warmly but with a look like he was saying ‘this is terrible, but isn’t it funny, we’re all in this and going to die together’.

Jay said shaking his head in wonderment “I’ve told them to give us five. Hopefully that will give us long enough to get in and have the element of surprise.” He paused and his face froze with his mouth open like asking a question “that should draw the entire mob from attacking us.”

I put my hand on Jays shoulder and then Judith’s. Then without a word I bent down on my knees and got down to the task of picking the padlock that held the bolt in place. I was using a skill I had learnt squatting and doing commercial burglaries. I examined the lock and then selected a flat hooked piece of metal and let it dangle from the lock, and then I selected a serrated pick and wriggled it in the lock, undoing its teeth. The padlock moved about a bit making the task difficult and I was tense and worried we would not open it in time. I worked even faster.

The padlock sprang and I shoved the bolt back and kicked the door with all my strength, which with astonishment I realised was considerable. I needn’t have bothered with the lock.

The door opened magically. The point of my foot hitting it was an explosion of orange, yellow and white light, spreading outwards from the point of impact. The door splintered into millions of fragments all floating inwards. They swarmed towards the three bouncers I could see filling the doorway shadowed black, blocking out all light from behind but just enough to see their figures outlined in a yellow line. The jagged splinters entered their faces, dawning with surprise and their arms positioned to shunt their bodies as fragments hit their hands.

In the changing positions I saw the outline of a revolver turning inwards to fire. The bouncers getting in line one behind the other. Jay had got to the front. He fired the zip gun from his hips like holding a phallus. He blew a hole clean in the man, a jagged hole where his stomach used to be. I slowed down time for our opponents. The faces of the bouncers behind the dead man could be seen crouching in diminishing perspectives created in conjoined mirrors of my tear glazed eyes, their blankness reflecting only my opponents. I fired the Dessert Eagle gun nearly ripping my arm off. The two heads exploded in bloody fragments of skull and brain matter.

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