Joe Hill: Twittering From the Circus of the Dead

8:13 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEHere comes the ringmistress again. She says the next act is the cat’s meo

8:14 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEOMG OMGthat was not funny. She almost fell down and the way they were snarling

8:16 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEThe men in hazmat suits just wheeled in a lion in a cage. Yay, a lion! I am still girl enough to like a big cat.

8:17 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEOh that’s a really sad, sick-looking lion. Not fun. They’re opening the cage and sending in zombies and he’s hissing like a housecat.

8:19 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTERoawwwwr! Lion power. He’s swatting them down and shredding them apart. He’s got an arm in his mouth. Everyone cheering.

8:21 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEEeeuuuw. Not so much cheering now. He’s got one and he’s tugging out its guts like he’s pulling on one end of a tug rope.

8:22 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEThey’re sending in more zombies. No one laughing or cheering now. It’s really crowded in there.

8:24 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEI can’t even see the lion anymore. Lots of angry snarling and flying fur and walking corpses getting knocked around.

8:24 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEOH GROSS. The lion made a sound, like this scared whine, and now the zombies are passing around organ meat and hunks of fur.

8:25 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEThey’re eating. That’s awful. I feel sick.

8:26 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEDad saw I was getting upset and told me how they did it. The cage has a false bottom. They pulled the lion out through the floor.

8:30 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEYou really get swept up in this thing.

8:30 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEThe Mickey Rooney guy who led us back to the seats just showed up with a flashlight. He says we left the headlights on in the van.

8:31 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEEric went to turn them off. He said he has to pee anyway.

8:32 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEThe fireswallower just came out. He has no eyes, and there’s some kind of steel contraption forcing his head back and his mouth open.

8:34 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEOne of the men in the hazmat suits isFUCK ME.

8:35 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEThey shoved a torch down his throat, and now he’s burning! He’s running around with smoke coming out of his mouth and

8:36 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEfire in his head coming out his eyes like a jack o lante

8:36 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEThey just let him burn to death from the inside out. Realest thing I’ve ever seen.

8:39 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEWhat’s even realer is the corpse after the hazmat guys sprayed it down with the fire extinguishers. It looks so sad and shriveled and black.

8:39 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEThe ringmistress is back. She’s really weaving around. I think something is wrong with her ankle.

8:40 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEShe says someone from the audience has agreed to be tonight’s sacrifice. She says he will be the lucky one.

8:41 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEHe? I thought the sacrifice was usually a girl in this sort of situation.

8:41 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEOh no he did not. They just wheeled Eric out, cuffed to a big wooden wheel. He winked on the way past. Psycho. Go, Eric!

8:42 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEThey hauled out a zombie and chained him to a stake in the dirt. There’s a box in front of him full of hatchets. Don’t like where this is going.

8:43 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEEveryone’s laughing now. The lion scene was a little grim, but we’re back to funny again. The zombie threw the first hatchet in the crowd.

8:45 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEThere was a thunk, and someone screamed like they got it in the head. Obvious plant.

8:45 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEEric is spinning around and around on the wheel. He’s telling the zombie to kill him before he throws up.

8:46 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEEeeks! I’m not as brave as Eric. A knife just banged into the wheel next to his head. Like: INCHES. Eric screamed too. Bet he wishes now

8:47 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEOMGOMGO

8:47 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEOkay. He must be okay. He was still smiling when they wheeled him out of the ring. The hatchet went right in the side of his neck.

8:50 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEDad says it’s a trick. Dad says he’s fine. He says later Eric will come out as a zombie. That it’s part of the show.

8:51 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEYep, looks like Dad’s right. They’ve promised Eric will reemerge shortly.

8:53 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEMom is wigging. She wants Dad to check on Eric.

8:54 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEShe’s being kind of crazy. She’s talking about how the guy who sat in front of us never came back after he got hit by the shoe.

8:55 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEI don’t really see what that has to do with Eric. And besides, if I got hit by a flying shoe . . .

8:55 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEOkay, Dad is going to check on Eric. Sanity restored.

8:56 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEHere comes the ringmistress again. This is why Eric agreed to go backstage. With the fishnets and black panties, she’s very goth-hot.

8:56 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEShe’s being weird. She isn’t saying anything about the next act. She says if she goes off script they don’t let her out of the ring.

8:57 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEBut she doesn’t care. She says she twisted her ankle and she knows tonight is her last night.

8:58 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEShe says her name is Gail Ross and she went to high school in Plano.

8:59 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEShe says she was going to marry her boyfriend after college. She says his name was Craig and he wanted to teach.

9:00 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEShe says she’s sorry for all of us. She says they take our cars and dispose of them while we’re in the tent.

9:01 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEShe says 12,000 people vanish every year on the roads with no explanation, their cars turn up empty or not at all and no one will miss us.

9:02 PM – 2 Mar from Tweetie