Joe Hill - Twittering From the Circus of the Dead

8:00 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEEric would put on a pair of my pantyhose. Not to stay warm. Just ’cause my little brother wants to wear my pantyhose.

8:00 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEI wrote that last bit ’cause Eric was looking over my shoulder.

8:02 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEBut the sick bastard said wearing my pantyhose is the closest he’ll probably come to getting laid in high school.

8:06 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEHe’s completely gross but I love him.

8:06 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEMom taught him to knit while we were snowed in here in happy CO and he knitted himself a cocksock, and then she was sorry.

8:11 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEI miss my blog, which she had no right to make me take down.

8:13 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEBut Twittering is better than blogging because my blog always made me feel like I should have interesting ideas to blog about.

8:14 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEBut on Twitter every post can only be 140 letters long. Which is enough room to cover every interesting thing to ever happen to me.

8:15 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTETrue. Check it out.

8:15 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEBorn. School. Mall. Cell phone. Driver’s permit. Broke my nose playing trapeze at 8–there goes the modeling career. Need to lose 10 lbs.

8:19 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEThink that covers it.

8:20 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEIt’s snowing in the mountains but not down here, snow falling in the sunlight in a storm of gold. Good-bye beautiful mountains.

9:17 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEHello not so beautiful Utah desert. Utah is brown and puckered like Judy Kennedy’s weird nipples.

9:51 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTE@caseinSD Yes she does have weird nipples. And it doesn’t make me a lesbo for noticing. Everyone notices.

10:02 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTESagebrush!!!!!! W00T!

11:09 AM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTENow Eric is trying on my pantyhose. He’s bored. Mom thinks it’s funny, but Dad is stressed.

12:20 PM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEDared Eric to wear a skirt in the diner to get our takeout. Dad says no. Mom is still laughing.

12:36 PM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEI promised him if he does it I’ll invite a certain hot goth to the pool party in April so he can see her in her tacky bikini.

12:39 PM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEThere’s no way he’ll do it.

12:42 PM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEZOMG hes doing it. Dad is going into the diner with him to make sure he isn’t killed by offended Mormons.

12:44 PM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEEric came back alive. Eric saves the day. I’m actually glad to be in the van right now.

12:59 PM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEDad says Eric sat at the bar and talked football with this big trucker guy. Trucker guy was fine with the skirt and pantyhose.

1:03 PM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEHe’s still wearing it. The skirt. He’s probably a total closet tranny. Sicko. Course that would be fun. We could shop together.

1:45 PM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTE@caseinSD Yes we do have to invite a certain goth to the pool party now. She probably won’t even come. I think sunlight burns her.

2:09 PM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEEvery time I start to fall asleep, the van hits a bump and my head falls off the seat.

11:01 PM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTETrying to sleep.

11:31 PM – 1 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEI give up trying to sleep.

1:01 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEOh fuck Eric. He’s asleep and he looks like he’s having a wet dream about a certain goth chick.

1:07 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEMeanwhile I’d have a better chance of sleeping if there were only steel pins inserted under my eyelids.

1:09 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEI’m so happy right now. I just want to hold this moment for as long as I can.

6:11 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEI just want to be home. I hate Mom. I hate everyone in the van. Including myself.

8:13 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEOkay. This is why I was happy earlier. It was 4 in the morning and Mom pulled into a rest area and then she came and got me.

10:21 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEShe said it was my turn to drive. I said my permit is only for driving in Cali, and she said just get behind the wheel.

10:22 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEShe told me if I got pulled over to wake her up and we’d switch and everything would be all right.

10:23 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTESo she went to sleep in the passenger seat and I drove. We were down in the desert and the sun came up behind me.

10:25 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEAnd then there were coyotes in the road. In the red sunlight. They were all over the interstate, and I stopped so I wouldn’t hit them.

10:26 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTETheir eyes were gold and the sun was in their fur and there were so many, this huge pack. Just standing there like they were waiting for me.

10:28 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEI wanted to take a picture with my cell phone, but I couldn’t figure out where I left it. While I was looking for it, they disappeared.

10:31 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEWhen Mom woke up, I told her all about them. And then I thought she’d be mad I didn’t shake her awake to see them, so I said I was sorry.

10:34 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEAnd she said she was glad I didn’t wake her up, because that moment was just for me. And for maybe three seconds I liked her again.

10:35 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEBut then in the place we ate breakfast I was looking at my e-mail for a sec. & I heard Mom saying to the waitress, We apologize for her.

10:37 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEI guess the waitress was standing there waiting for my order and I didn’t notice.

10:40 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEBut I didn’t sleep all night and I was tired and zoned out and that’s why I didn’t notice, not ’cause I was looking at my phone.

10:42 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEAnd Mom had to trot out her stories about being a waitress herself and that it was demeaning not to be acknowledged.

10:45 AM – 2 Mar from Tweetie

TYME2WASTEJust to rub it in. And she can be completely right and I can still hate the way she makes me feel like shit at every opportunity.