Diana Richardson - Tantric Sex for Men

sex, we will possibly witness a dramatic reduction in the sex, love, and relationship problems to

which people unhappily resign themselves.

HUMANS NEED MORE SEX

Sexual difficulties are experienced by both men and women, with the tragic outcome that human

beings do not have enough sex. When sex finally happens the experience is short lived. Most partners

do not have sex frequently enough for optimum mental, physical, and emotional health. Many do not

make love for months and months on end, sometimes stretching into years. Sex satisfies our bodies,

hearts, souls, intelligence, creativity, and most of all, our love—of self and of others. Sex is not the

only way to access love, but if you are having or wanting sex, as most men are, then sex may as well

be used to its highest potential.

When a U.K. satellite television channel recently conducted a survey on what people on their

deathbeds regret most, seven out of ten British pensioners—both men and women—regretted not

having “shagged around” (screwed around) more. As people were dying they were wishing they had

had more sex in their lives. What an incredible revelation, that human beings are leaving this world

sexually unfulfilled. Since it is becoming urgent and necessary for human beings to have more sex

during their lifetimes, we need to develop a more evolved, sustainable style of sex that is manageable

until our dying day. We need an approach that doesn’t fizzle out when the newness is lost, disinterest

or complacency sets in, or impotence or diminished hormones make sex more difficult.

EXPLORATION AND VULNERABILITY

To get more out of sex requires taking an adventurous step motivated by curiosity, intelligence, or

both. The key is to make love frequently using the information and suggestions offered in the chapters

ahead. If you follow where it leads and stay with what unfolds, you may soon notice a change in the

quality of your life and a difference in how you feel about yourself as a man. You may even begin to

perceive women differently.

As you begin to explore sex, old childhood wounds, memories, and insecurities may rise to the

surface. It’s better not to try to override or ignore any sexual difficulty or insecurity. Be open to

yourself and allow your feelings to emerge, expressing any tears and vulnerability, not-knowing,

insecurity, or confusion. Allowing yourself space to feel hidden aspects of your being is part of a

healing and reintegrating process. Sexual exploration is a journey in self-discovery that not only leads

to being a better lover with improved skills, but also can transform age-old restrictive patterns and

generate more love and happiness. One thing is for certain—most women prefer a man’s gentle, softer

side to his hard, tougher side.

Rarely in the lifetime of the average human being are there altered states of orgasmic bliss, love,

joy, and a peace that surpasses all understanding. The experience of being radiantly alive on a

cellular level. Energized and aglow through merging with the body and its senses. Making love

naturally presents us with an incredibly easy situation within which to “be present” and immerse

ourselves in the body. Because of the absence of evolved sexual understanding, the human race

suffers tremendous consequences. We are distorted by unconscious forces that affect our true nature,

so that men are not truly men and women are not truly women. When we relate or connect through

these distortions of our personalities and sexual identification, sooner or later the invariable result is

tension and unhappiness.

SEXUAL CONDITIONING AND HOW IT SHAPES US

Each of us is unconsciously conditioned by society whether we like it or not, some more heavily than

others. In conventional sexuality the majority of men tend to demonstrate the distorted versions of

their true male qualities. Below you’ll find a list of true male qualities in the first column, each of

which is followed by a word or a few words describing the same quality after it has been distorted

through false sexual conditioning. The 1960s-era saying, “Make love, not war,” is actually a truth. A

lack of sufficient fulfilling or nourishing sex often results in anger and aggression. Changing a man’s

understanding, and therefore his experience of sex, naturally calls forth his original, authentic male

qualities.

TRUE MALE QUALITIES VERSUS

CONDITIONED DISTORTIONS

Power

Abuse, domination

Presence

Absence

Strength

Hardness

Clarity

Judgment

Assertiveness

Aggression

Creativity

Achievement, ambition

Meditation

Reclusiveness

Will

Stubbornness

Courage

Machismo, compensation

Leadership

Control, politics, law and order

Protector, authority

Authoritarian

Wildness

Brutality

Spontaneity

Performance

Wisdom

Arrogance

Charisma

Sexual manipulation

Sun, life giving

Sunburn, ecological destruction

Expression, articulation

Pomposity, boorishness

Action

Activity, bullishness

Independence

Isolation

Heartfelt, loving, compassionate

Selfish, egoistic

Tantric Inspiration

We live for sensations, we hanker for sensations. We go on seeking newer and newer sensations; our whole life is

an effort to obtain new sensations. But what happens? The more you seek sensations, the less sensitive you

become. Sensitivity is lost.

It looks paradoxical. In sensations, sensitivity is lost. Then you ask for more and more sensations and the “more”

kills your sensitivity more. Then you ask for even more, and finally a moment comes when all your senses have

become dull and dead. Man has never before been so dull and dead as he is today. He was always more alive

before, because there were not so many possibilities to fulfill so many sensations. But now science, progress,

civilization, education, have created so many opportunities to move further and further into the world of sensation.

Ultimately, you turn into a dead person; your sensitivity is lost. Taste more foods—stronger tastes, stronger foods—

and your taste will be lost. If you move around the world and go on seeing more and more beautiful things, you will

become blind; the sensitivity of your eyes will be lost.

If you want the divine—the divine means the most alive, the ever-alive, ever-young, evergreen—if you want to

meet the divine, you will have to be more alive. How to do it? Kill out all desire for sensation. Don’t seek sensation,

seek sensitivity, become more sensitive.

The two are different. If you ask for sensations you will ask for things; you will accumulate things. But if you ask

for sensitivity, the whole work has to be done on your senses, not on things. You are not to accumulate things. You

have to deepen your feelings, your heart, your eyes, your ears, your nose. Every sense should be deepened in such a

way that it becomes capable of feeling the subtle.

OSHO, TRANSCRIBED TEACHINGS,

NEW ALCHEMY TO TURN YOU ON

2

INVOLUNTARY EJACULATION AND

DESENSITIZATION

Perhaps the most common problem or issue faced by men is their lack of control over ejaculation,

which results in an extremely high prevalence of premature ejaculation. And as we know, perhaps far