Alexander Theroux - Darconville’s Cat

—from Atalanta the advoutress,

—from Medusa and her forked hair,

—from Lady Bercilak, the baggage

of babliaminy,

—from Lamia the hellhag,

—from Telesâ, the aitu auleaga of Samoa,

—from Mother Middle, the factor

of mediocrity,

—from Sassia, the criminal bimbo,

—from Delilah of Sorek,

the philoepiorcian philistine,

—from Famiglietta, the Neapolitan

drazel. .”

Darconville’s heart hammered in his ear as the grotesque incantation, relentless with the music, summoned up a terror in him that wiped his countenance clear of all emotions but the signature of overmastering fear that chilled him up to his hair and down to his feet. Was he asleep: Was this a bad dream?

“—from Queen Endoxia of Alexandria, libera nos, Domine

—from Angiola Pietragwa,

nymphe du pavé ,

—from disc-headed Hathor, goddess of

Urt,

—from Adnil Notrub, the Falcon

Countess,

—from Taitu, the Mote in the Sunbeam,

—from Cressida, the dreadful she-Ghul,

—from Gothone, the shilpit,

—from Frédégunde, the Frankish frisgig

and assassin,

—from Agrat bat Mahlah, the axwaddle,

—from Kikimora, the objurgatrix,

—from Clytemnestra, the cullisance

of scabiosity,

—from Princess Aura, lustful daughter

of Ming the Merciless,

—from Salome and her shaking rags,

—from Tituba, the human tractatrix,

—from Queen Zinga of Angola,

—from Pasht, the cat-headed woman,

—from Anna Maria Zwanzigar,

pucelle venimeuse ,

—from the Women of Lemnos,

—from Mother Gruel, the elvish shrew,

—from Irene Adler, the immoderatrix,

—from Stheno the Gorgon and her

wanton franions,

—from Lais the Corinthian snake,

—from Miss Lookingbothways,

the laiscarpotic,

—from Laverna, goddess of thieves,

—from the Wasawahili Women

of Madagascar,

—from Shub-niggurath, craftress of love,

—from Sylvia Tietjens and her enameled

cruelty,

—from Mistress Tomasin, Queen

Elizabeth’s dwarf,

—from Ulrike von Levetzow and her

organs of increase,

—from Mutter Erde and her foolish

fecundity,

—from Ann Partridge, schoolmastercide,

—from Cottina, whore of the Levant,

—from Myrtium the frigstress,

—from Ninhursag, the Mesopotamian

matrix,

—from Black Annis of Leicester,

—from Natasha Rostova,

the Woman Who Couldn’t Wait a

Year,

—from Eris, goddess of discord,

—from Lulu the Wunderkind,

—from Chrysis, Corone, Ischas,

and Antycra, the Homeric harlots,

—from Gabrina, the pounding waive,

—from Zenobia, the Arab magliaia ,

—from Bess Broughton’s unbuttoned

smock,

—from all the Amalekite bitches,

—from Lesbia, titular mistress of Martial,

—from Aphrodite Kalligluttus, the

strumpet,

—from the Thumblings of Daeumlinge,

—from Gonorilla and her buzzard

women,

—from Nana the nysot,

—from Mère Guettautrou and her

chagatte,

—from the Women of Midia,

—from Crobyle the Hairbuckle,

—from Echidna the half-snake,

—from Kwotsxwoe, the Quinault

Indian quaedam,

—from Decreto the Moon Maid,

—from Sechmet, the Egyptian

bloodmonger,

—from Miss Funderburk, la malheureuse ,

—from Skogfrau, the Woman

of the Thicket,

—from Mistress Birdlime, Moll

Tenterhook, and Mabel Wafer,

the loosened drawlatches. .”

Crucifer, side-stepping the furniture, was traveling as well around the ramparts of his own madness, telling it all in a shower of pain as if he’d stored up such phrases over a lifetime for such eventualities to proscribe the destinies of souls in a vocabulary that pretended to exhaust elements for which even the reaches of uncommon brutality had no interest, no access, and no words.

“—from Asherah of Ugarit, libera nos, Domine

—from Hine-nui-te-po, goddess of death,

—from Erzulie Mapionne, voudounist,

—from Mary Baker Eddy and her

M.A.M.,

—from Trulla, Bradamante,

and Radigund, warriors of woe,

—from Monhigan, the crow-shaped

enchantress,

—from Dippthese the doxy,

—from La Belle Ferronnière, la greluche ,

—from Cynara the Scorta,

—from Pontianek the Amboira Witch,

—from the Empusai vampires,

—from Mayavel, 400-breasted goddess

of the Agave,

—from Dinah the gadabout,

—from Rhodopis, the insatiable punk,

—from Ishtar, deceiver of Gilgamesh,

—from Keres, eater of corpses,

—from La Gambogi and her ivory teeth,

—from Phanostrate Phtheropyle,

Queen of Ceronicus,

—from Friga, mistress of Mars,

—from Izanami, Japanese goddess

of putrefaction,

—from Dark Anu of Ireland,

—from Archidice the lupanarette,

—from Claria Leonza of Venezuela,

stupefier of men,

—from Nut, goddess of the goetic,

—from Venus Vulgivaga, the wandering

womb,

—from Blodeuwedd the Celtic runnion,

—from all the Potniae, Maniac,

and Praxidikae,

—from Marguerite de Bourgogne,

la pavute ,

—from Louiatar, the blind whore

of Pohjola,

—from Manosa, goddess of cobra bite,

—from Madame Pochet and Madame

Gibou, beastettes,

—from Hathor-Sekhmet, exterminator

of mankind,

—from Chicomecoatl, the empress of

devils,

—from the Danish Ellefruwen

and Swedish Skogsnufua,

—from Ignoge, Daughter of Albion,

—from Mère Castratrice the trancist,

—from Aphrodite Androphonous,

the Sodomite vixen,

—from the Women of Goes,

—from Lilith, the Woman-Who-Invites,

—from Archippe and Theoris, the

spoffokins of Sophocles,

—from Linda Lubberlegs, the Woman

Who Never Showed Up,

—from Tekla Degener, scold,

—from Sumerian Inanna, the sender

of plagues,

—from Cleine, Mneside, Pothyne,

Myrtia, and all Egyptian gavials

and rannels. .”

The crescendo was ritualistic, an arithmetic of blasphemy and cruelty borne along on the inexorability of its own logical laws made instantly incompatible with any changing, revising, or rejecting opposition that might have been brought forth to prosecute against it and wailed in the sensation of those utterances that were always pitched antiphonally to the musical deathcry as if to deny that evil, without this archabominational chant, couldn’t either be recognized or understood.

“—from Mother Cresswell and her claps, libera nos, Domine

—from Canidia, the human dreep,

—from Anna Arkadyevna Karenina,

the woman of dinge,

—from Maria Grubbe, sadist,

—from Levidulcia and her inclinations,

—from Arachne, originator of spinning,

—from Juoda Hercogiené,

the Lithuanian bonce,

—from Emma Bridemann, elected vessel

of the Mormons,

—from Poppeia, the sexual swill of Nero,

—from the Baroness de Nucingen,

die Alte Hexe ,

—from Mathilde Mauté, vaticide,

—from Joan Trash, the lady of the

basket,

—from Elizabeth I, who died without

hair in 1603,

—from Miss Fudpucker the fecalist,

—from Eisheth Zenunim, the common

stale,

—from Ann Hathaway, the wappened

widow,

—from the 33 Wicked Daughters

of Diocletian,

—from Aspasia and her four-doored

womb,