Simon Holland - Test Your Cat 2 - Genius Edition - Confirm your cat’s undiscovered genius!

Copyright Copyright Dedication Introduction Chapter One: Physical Tests Chapter Two: Territorial Tests Chapter Three: Meteorology and Cat Cosmology Chapter Four: Psychological Tests Chapter Five: Supernatural Tests The Scores Acknowledgements About the Publisher General Certificate of Feline Excellence

HarperCollins Publishers

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London SE1 9GF

www.harpercollins.co.uk

First published by HarperCollins Publishers in 2015

Text copyright © 2015 Simon Holland

Illustrations by Erica Salcedo Saiz

Cover and interior design by Rosamund Saunders

Cat-sultant: Carron Brown

Cover images © Shutterstock

A catalogue record of this book is available from the British Library

All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.

Find out about HarperCollins and the environment at www.harpercollins.co.uk/green

Source ISBN 978-0-00-794929-8

EPub Edition © October 2016 ISBN 9780008150426

Version: 2016-09-13

Dedication Dedication Introduction Chapter One: Physical Tests Chapter Two: Territorial Tests Chapter Three: Meteorology and Cat Cosmology Chapter Four: Psychological Tests Chapter Five: Supernatural Tests The Scores Acknowledgements About the Publisher General Certificate of Feline Excellence

In memory of Rupert, the Über-Cat.

And to Smudge, who always scores well.

Contents

Cover

Title Page

Copyright Copyright Copyright Dedication Introduction Chapter One: Physical Tests Chapter Two: Territorial Tests Chapter Three: Meteorology and Cat Cosmology Chapter Four: Psychological Tests Chapter Five: Supernatural Tests The Scores Acknowledgements About the Publisher General Certificate of Feline Excellence HarperCollins Publishers 1 London Bridge Street London SE1 9GF www.harpercollins.co.uk First published by HarperCollins Publishers in 2015 Text copyright © 2015 Simon Holland Illustrations by Erica Salcedo Saiz Cover and interior design by Rosamund Saunders Cat-sultant: Carron Brown Cover images © Shutterstock A catalogue record of this book is available from the British Library All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books. Find out about HarperCollins and the environment at www.harpercollins.co.uk/green Source ISBN 978-0-00-794929-8 EPub Edition © October 2016 ISBN 9780008150426 Version: 2016-09-13

Dedication Dedication Dedication Introduction Chapter One: Physical Tests Chapter Two: Territorial Tests Chapter Three: Meteorology and Cat Cosmology Chapter Four: Psychological Tests Chapter Five: Supernatural Tests The Scores Acknowledgements About the Publisher General Certificate of Feline Excellence In memory of Rupert, the Über-Cat. And to Smudge, who always scores well.

Introduction Introduction It’s fair to say that cats have always had a head start on humans. The distant ancestors of cats appeared about 30 million years ago, while ours came about only two or three million years ago – with modern humans dragging their heels (or the backs of their hands?) until their eventual appearance on the evolutionary scene roughly 200,000 years ago. We now know that humans have been living with cats, or keeping them as pets, for over 12,000 years. So by the time of the ancient Egyptians – who elevated cats to a god-like status about 3,600 years ago – cats had already had more than enough time to get their paws under the antique coffee tables of some of the most successful human civilizations in history. When cats and humans first crossed paths, it would have been obvious to cats that humans were there for the taking. These docile, pliable, manipulable mammals were lolloping about on two legs – which seemed to be some kind of ‘amazing novelty’ – and were far too impressed by fire to notice the feline forms slipping tasty marshmallows from their campfire sticks. ‘At last,’ thought the cats, ‘our days of foraging and fending for ourselves are over. We’ve finally found a species gullible enough to do it all for us.’ But over the last 10,000 years or so, maybe domestic cats have become a bit complacent. And maybe there just aren’t enough challenges anymore . . . not enough stresses left in feline life to keep cats shimmying up the evolutionary scale. It’s time for them to start thinking outside the basket, and here’s how you – the cat owner – can help. With the aid of this book, you can set your pet a series of tasks and activities that will reveal the complex nature of their existing skills and abilities. At the same time – who knows? – these challenges may also have the knock-on effect of boosting their brilliance and teasing some new feline adaptations out of their evolutionary slumber . . . so that cats can conquer the modern world all over again.

Chapter One: Physical Tests

Chapter Two: Territorial Tests

Chapter Three: Meteorology and Cat Cosmology

Chapter Four: Psychological Tests

Chapter Five: Supernatural Tests

The Scores

Acknowledgements

About the Publisher

General Certificate of Feline Excellence

Introduction Introduction Introduction It’s fair to say that cats have always had a head start on humans. The distant ancestors of cats appeared about 30 million years ago, while ours came about only two or three million years ago – with modern humans dragging their heels (or the backs of their hands?) until their eventual appearance on the evolutionary scene roughly 200,000 years ago. We now know that humans have been living with cats, or keeping them as pets, for over 12,000 years. So by the time of the ancient Egyptians – who elevated cats to a god-like status about 3,600 years ago – cats had already had more than enough time to get their paws under the antique coffee tables of some of the most successful human civilizations in history. When cats and humans first crossed paths, it would have been obvious to cats that humans were there for the taking. These docile, pliable, manipulable mammals were lolloping about on two legs – which seemed to be some kind of ‘amazing novelty’ – and were far too impressed by fire to notice the feline forms slipping tasty marshmallows from their campfire sticks.