Arnon Grunberg - Tirza

Two times he is already with the plateau full of sushi and sashimi ingewandeld the garden. To practice for as the young people are the future. The plateau is specially for Tirza's party purchased in the Japanese shopping in the Beethovenstraat. He is proud. They know him in that shop by name.

The torches are lit. Its apple tree has a ship's steward two weeks ago nobody pruned to allow the risk in tipsy condition against a low hanging branch to walk.

He has also now tidied itself, he looks good and yet unobtrusive, he says. As fathers to see hear out, they want at least prevent the child is ashamed for them. To children is good to note how natural assimilation. The child would like nothing better than the color of its surroundings.

Jörgen ship's steward is like a rocket which is ready for the launch.

It stands on the crank and pours himself a glass of kir. On the worktop he has a makeshift bar installed. He has prepared for the creation of five different kinds of cocktails.

In fact he keeps not of kir, but it is Tirza's favorite drink. They have agreed that all guests to start a glass of kir get unless they explicitly ask something else. Even though because of the color. Will be nice. All that bright red.

Are to kir sweet, he throws in some white wine to drink and the glass hastily empty. Then he looks at his watch. Quarter for eight and still does not have the dog. They will be able to do it? It is not his party, he gives all years no celebrations, for decades not more, but he is worried. Visions that they did he leave Tirza choke and that the family ship's steward all sushi only be eaten. These visions votes him, with the glass of kir in his hand, boatyard, as though he were already know that they will actually become reality. As if it were not to be in any doubt that his fear dreams will come true. He gives himself a second glass of kir in and shout out also with his fingers on the worktop. Earlier at Book presentations he felt the same, the fear that he would be only with the author, shame on him most did when he had to come to the Author with the words: 'I think we should do with two, but that is our fine.' The panic that it could fall over just before he had to take a short speech in which he on serious and at the same time ironic, author and book or translator and book would imply. For the press who rarely was inconvenient. But that is now all over.

Soon he drinks his second glass of kir empty. 'Tirza,' he calls. 'Tirza.' There is no reaction.

He picks up the plateau with sushi and sashimi and is there for the third time in the garden. He introduces himself that the garden is full of guests. He will be the reachout which he has not met earlier tell us who he is, Tirza's father, then interested in their stories to listen. Who knows he will be a young man a convivial stub shaft in the abdomen and whisper: 'Have you not a time in my bathroom met?' Nothing will bring him out of his balance. It will be a perfect hosts. They will go home, the children, and think: what has a nice father's Tirza

After a tour through the garden, run it transmits the plateau back to the kitchen, covered with foil and put it in the fridge. He remains at the sink stand panting. Towing with the raw fish put it. He gives a glass of kir.

No, for book presentations he need never worry about. There is a reorganization of the publisher. First they wanted to dismiss him, but then they found out that because of his age was impossible. The law did not stop, the law stood between him and his dismissal in, and the law was relentless in such cases. At the beginning of April he was summoned to the Director, who are generally only with the finance and the wishes of the main office occupied herself. A heady and difficult to fathom god, the main office.

First keuvelden them enough about everyday affairs, the director and he. The children. The climate. Both of the exhibition as of the society but also in the more meteorological sense of the word. The warming of the earth came in a phrase. And then some less enough matters. The fatal disease of the head of the marketing department. Marokkaantjes for difficulties made jam problem., Especially the latter was the managing director to the heart, he lived in Naarden.

After the congestion issue you raised, was the director lazy in his chair hang from, as if the call was in fact already past, and when he had asked: 'Jörgen, what important author have you discovered really is for us, all the years that you worked here? Have you ever watched author discovered?'

The question was about a ship's steward, because they had just come to the question of Moroccans and traffic jams.

He looked out of the window when the director, then to the office and then back out the window. There was a tree in front of the window. The tree was carefully in bloom.

'I did especially translated fiction,' said ship's steward. 'I do especially translated fiction,' improved himself. 'Germany, Eastern Europe, the Caucasus, is happening today much interesting. And for a while I worked on the sports book, but that was me frankly.'

'No,' said the director, 'sport Books Are you not. But you can also discover an author in Germany, or in Eastern Europe? I am wrong? The problem of the authors who brought you have is that they only have cost us money, never diverted, cost only.' He leaned even further behind. 'You know, Jörgen,' he said, 'You will not believe what I have to say. We wanted to dismiss you, but our lawyer has discovered that in view of your age is impossible. And you know what we do now? We pay you just two and a half years from, or what it is, that two years and eight months which you still have to go to you. That we pay you, including everything, insurance, holiday allowance, tended. But you do not more. You need never to come to the office. You are free to go.'

When was the director on and grabbed der Grijn transmit Hofmeesters hand so ship's steward felt compelled to also. The Director looked as if he were a television closer presenter was that its candidate the main price should be able to issue but a ship's steward could not believe that the Director really thought that this is a main price was. This was not a main price.

'What are you saying?' asked the director. 'What did you say, Jörgen?'

Ship's steward did his best to look friendly and for the first time since he had to think times his parents and to his secondary school time. Apparently it didn't matter how old you was, fifty-four, fifty-eight, sixty two, once a skipped school boy in you was to come and live and not in good time, then he remained verjoeg always there. The humiliation, that was the constant factor that was what him with the person who he bond had been at thirteen years of age. The imaginary humiliation, which perhaps was even worse than the real thing.

'I do not know what I have to say,' said ship's steward and he took his hand gently from that of the Director. Are always warm and wet hands, the eternal fear to be caught, but which, that he did not know. In fact there was nothing that they could catch him. He took no pushpin home from the office.

'I did want to continue, but this is of course also fine,' he said. He wondered why he failed to say that this is what it is concerned not at all was fine, why is he not from his mouth got. Why he is so keen to give the impression that everything went. That things are always went on as he would have liked to have seen.

For the change gave the impression that he is not very convincing. He felt bewildered and he doubted that the distress, completely against his sentence to read on his face was. Perhaps more than confusion: terror.

To allay fears, to the whole of the appearance of a friendly conversation, suspected ship's steward, slammed the director the net is not discharged employee a few times on the shoulder and said: 'Is this not the dream of us all? By paid but not more need to work? Enjoy it. Go travel. Or rowing. You will still always like just rowed across? Disconnect your desk empty and take the. I am jealous of you, I say it you are honest, I am jealous of you, but yes, I cannot yet not road, Jörgen.' The director picked for the second time Hofmeesters hand and ship's steward felt now a pop, controlled by others. Not he himself, but someone else checked his movements, his statements, even his thoughts. Something was stronger than his will. The fear, shame, the calculation that it was better not to cause problems.