Melanie Gideon - Wife 22

“You haven’t let me down, William. And your ‘not trying’ wasn’t the only reason you were laid off. I know that. A part of it was out of your control. Maybe it’s my fault, too, somehow. All of this. Where we are. Maybe I let you down, too.”

He turns to face me. “You haven’t let me down, Alice.”

“Okay. But if I did, and I probably did, I’m sorry. I’m really sorry, too.”

He gathers his breath. “I should take this job. I like paper. And pens. And sticky notes. And highlighters.”

“I love highlighters. Especially the green ones.”

“And mailing supplies.”

“And staplers. Don’t forget staplers. Do you know staples come in colors now? And Lafayette has a great downtown. You can probably walk there for lunch from the office. Grab a Starbucks in the afternoon.”

“I hadn’t thought of that,” says William, dipping a cracker in the hummus. “That will be nice.”

“Have you formally accepted?”

“I wanted to talk it over with you first.”

“When do you need to give them an answer?”

“I have a week.”

“Well, let’s just let it sink in. Really weigh the pros and cons.”

I’m hoping this will buy me some time to find out what’s going on with my job. I haven’t heard anything back from Kentwood Elementary as to my query about going full-time in the fall, but I’m hopeful. Often the Parents’ Association doesn’t make decisions about how funds are being dispersed until the very last minute.

“Seeing that there are no other job offers forthcoming there are only pros, Alice. I can’t think of any negatives,” says William.

He’s right. We don’t have the luxury of choice. Nobody does. Not anymore.

The next day I wake with a headache and a fever. I spend the morning in bed, and at lunchtime William and Zoe bring me up a tray: a bowl of chicken noodle soup, a glass of ice water, and the mail: an envelope and People magazine.

I sniff the soup. “Mmmm.”

“Imperial Tea Court,” William says.

I pop a noodle into my mouth. “You drove to Imperial Tea Court? In Berkeley?”

He shrugs. “They make the best noodles. Besides, my days of bringing you noodles in the middle of the day are numbered.”

“What are you talking about?” asks Zoe.

“Nothing,” I say.

We haven’t told the children about William’s job offer yet. I know they’ve been worried and will be very relieved to hear he’s employed again, but I don’t want to say anything to them until we’ve made a firm decision. William and I glance at each other.

“Obviously not nothing,” says Zoe.

Jampo comes running into the room and leaps on the bed.

William snatches him up. “You’re not allowed up there. How about a run, you monster?” Jampo stares at him aggressively like he’s a terrorist and then suddenly licks his face. William’s really been making an effort with Jampo. Are they friends now?

“We need to have a discussion about nothing this evening,” I say.

“Can you give me a ride to Jude’s before your run, Dad?” asks Zoe.

Jude and Zoe are officially a couple again. The day after we caught the mouse, I heard Zoe on the phone with Jude, crying and apologizing. That night he came over for dinner and the two of them held hands under the table. It was so sweet and felt so right it stopped my heart.

“I guess so. Caroline and I have to talk to Nedra about the cake, anyway. Alice, are you two speaking yet?”

“I’m about to send her a smoke signal,” I say.

“The wedding is in two weeks. Perhaps you should light the fire now.”

After lunch I take another nap, and when I wake I swallow three more Advil. I can’t seem to shake this headache. Everything aches. Even my rib cage. I listen for noises from downstairs but it’s quiet. Nobody’s home but me. I log on, but there’s nothing from Researcher 101: no email and no Facebook messages. I’m almost relieved that’s the case. I finish off the noodles. I rifle through People. Then I open the envelope that’s come in the day’s mail.

Dear Alice Buckle,

The Kentwood Elementary School Parents’ Association regrets to inform you that we will not be renewing your contract as a drama teacher for the upcoming school year. As you know, the Oakland public school system is experiencing dire budget shortfalls, and it has been decided the funds that the Parents’ Association previously dedicated to the Drama Program will have to be rerouted elsewhere. We appreciate your years of loyal service and wish you the very best of luck in your endeavors.

Sincerely,

The Kentwood Elementary School Parents’ Association Board

Mrs. Alison Skov

Mr. Farhan Zavala

Mrs. Kendrick Bamberger

Ms. Rhonda Hightower

Mrs. Chet Norman

A door slams downstairs and a few seconds later, I hear laughter. I lie there in bed, stunned. Why didn’t I see this coming? I should have known something was up when I saw Mrs. Norman at Berkeley Rep. Clearly this was already in the works. She was so smug and her husband so apologetic; she most likely spearheaded my termination.

When William clomps up the stairs in his sneakers, I pretend to be asleep. He walks to the side of the bed and I can feel his eyes on my face. He gently touches the back of his hand to my forehead to see if I’m hot.

“You’re a bad faker,” he says.

“I’ve been fired,” I whisper.

I hear the rustle of paper as he reads the letter. “Fuck them,” he says.

“It hurts,” I whimper.

William puts his hand on mine. “I know, Alice.”

I’m sick for the next three days.

“It’s a summer flu,” says Bunny. “You just have to let it run its course.”

Every morning, I get up thinking it will have passed. I go downstairs, pour myself a cup of coffee, feel nauseous at the smell of it, and go back upstairs.

“She’s a very bad patient,” says Jack.

“The worst,” says William.

“Am I not sighing enough?” I ask.

“No. You’re not moaning enough, either,” says William.

“We need to talk,” I say. “About nothing ,” meaning his job offer.

“When you’re feeling better.”

I watch bad TV. I spend a lot of time online.

KED3 (Kentwood Elementary Third Grade Drama Parents’ Forum) Digest #134

KED3ParentsForum@yahoogroups.com

Messages. in this digest (6)

1. I’m starting a Get Alice Buckle Her Job Back group. Please join me! Posted by: Farmymommy

2. RE: I’m starting a Get Alice Buckle Her Job Back group. Please join me.Yes! Count me in. I have to admit I feel terrible about the way this was handled. It was done so impersonally. Somebody (you know who I’m talking about, Storminnormandy) should have had the courage to tell her face-to-face. At the very least she should have been given a goodbye lunch, at Blackberries, or Red Boy Pizza. Yes, Charlotte’s Web was a disaster. We all agree with that (sorry, mothers of the geese), but doesn’t she deserve another chance? And if not another chance, at least appreciation for all her years of service? Posted by: Queenbeebeebee

3. RE: I’m starting a Get Alice Buckle Her Job Back group. Please join me.Are you kidding me? May I remind you Alice Buckle basically had our kids do a striptease dance in the auditorium. All that was missing was the pole. Posted by: Helicopmama

4. RE: I’m starting a Get Alice Buckle Her Job Back group. Please join me.Please desist from starting this group. There are circumstances that none of you are aware of that led to Alice Buckle’s termination. Circumstances that I cannot, unfortunately, reveal to you at this time. What I can tell you is that Ms. Buckle had some serious lapses in judgment. Let’s just leave it at that and move on. Posted by: Storminnormandy