William Gaddis - J R

— Haven’t you boys washed up yet?

— No but Mister Duncan is he, I guess he’s still asleep I called the nurse for him last night when he…

— Mister Duncan…?

— I was just telling him how much I, wait what are you closing the curtain…

— Joe? will you bring that chair in out there?

— Wait where’s he going is he awake? Mister Duncan? I just remembered something is there a piano here someplace Miss Waddams? That piece of music you said your daughter used to practice the one you said you’d never heard right? I think I know what it…

— No over here Joe, Mister Bast’s going down to the solarium would you like that Mister Bast?

— Well, well all right yes but I haven’t even had breakfast I mean what’s…

— We’ll bring you some just get your feet down that’s it, your friend Mister Coen called he said he’s bringing your cousin up, the one whose husband’s in intensive care now step back, that’s it, that will be nice won’t it sit back now, do you feel steady?

— Fine yes I feel fine but what wait, wait is he awake? I just wanted to tell him that piece your daughter used to practice Mister Duncan? I think I know what it was I’ll play it for you later and see, I think it’s a piano piece Beethoven wrote for…

— Go ahead Joe hurry up… she came after them — and come right back… but she paused there through the door, finding a tissue before she turned up the corridor. — Is there a doctor on the floor yet?

— Why what happened.

— They left me an expiration in three nineteen last night, you busy?

— I’ve got a pre-op in three eleven this nasty old…

— Would you change with me?

— What for three nineteen? sure what’s…

— I just, you just get to like them sometimes…

— Don’t worry you won’t get to like this one watch out though, they said he’s a trustee here…

— Thanks… she paused outside the door using the tissue, brought her weight against it. — Good morning, are we read…

— Where the two phones I ordered put in here.

— There’s a telephone right there beside the bed sir, if you…

— Told them to put in two outside lines here can’t waste half the day going through your damn switchboard every time I…

— Hoid your water John you’re just here to have a plug changed, nurse I told them at the desk out there to bring me some Bananx where is it.

— I don’t know ma’am I don’t think we…

— It’s a hospital isn’t it? You don’t use drugs in a hospital?

— Yes ma’am but we can’t hand them out to a visitor without any doc…

— Visitor! you’ll see a visitor who’ll hand you something hand you your ass if you can’t, who’s doing this implant, Handler? You call Doctor Han…

— Damn it Zona start this you better get a room of your own here where the devil’s Beaton, should have been here three minutes ago.

— I wouldn’t get a room of my own here for an ingrown toenail, I came in three years ago to have my tubes blown out and couldn’t open my eyes till they painted these filthy green walls put up my own drapes and got rid of this atrocious furniture look at this chair, I feel like I’m sitting on a pot.

— Look like it too Zona just waiting for the barrage to start, here what the devil do you want.

— If you could get into your gown sir, we…

— Have to get out of my damn shirt first don’t I? Get me the, here he is Beaton? Hang this up in the closet get hold of the director here what’s his name get these phones put in get my arm here young woman, wasted one day getting this damn thing implanted waste another getting it replaced I told you to look into this company Beaton, Broos down there holding hearings on these research projects if they’re as useless as this damn thing they should have stayed in toys let go of me girl!

— I’ve looked into it yes sir, it all sounds so prepos…

— Dried up old Raggedy Andy what makes you think they didn’t stay in toys lift up his little gown Beaton, let’s see if the toy heart they gave him says I love…

— Zona damn it be quiet I didn’t ask you how it sounded Beaton I asked what you found out down there get this shoe off me will you?

— Yes sir I’m waiting for a call now from one of the Senator’s staff people who’s down at the company’s Texas installation as an observer on this Teletrav…

— Careful damn it! want to take my foot off…

— Yes sir I’m sorry, he tells me the parent company’s head of personnel who went down there to troubleshoot the project is scheduled to take part in a preliminary evaluation of its operational capabilities this morning as soon as they…

— Poor devil where they sending him.

— They have a phone company trunk line leased to an undisclosed receiving point somewhere in Maine sir I presume it’s an Army base, the company’s research director insists on establishing the system’s long-range capacity at the outset although it hardly…

— What I saw in the papers sounds like the same stunt he pulled with this Frigicom project, gets the DOD to draw up an impact statement shut up these damn fish lovers could have settled it with a car horn but he starts off with some complicated damn fool piece of music…

— Yes sir however I’ve pointed out all the Committee has is his word that this music was actually…

— Told you to get onto him down there too didn’t I? find out what the devil here put these in the closet…

— Yes sir I did quite inadvertently in fact, he joined me in a men’s room in the Senate Office Building where he wet my, granted he was hampered by bandages he wet my leg thoroughly during a brief conversation which convinced me the man is certifiably insane frankly sir this idea of transporting people by cable is so utterly preposterous I…

— Sounds like he just wet down your pride a little Beaton damn it you’re not a scientist neither am I, think how preposterous television sounded a few years ago now you can’t get away from the damn thing ever see color television? One bawling idiot after another on the screen, send his bawling picture a thousand miles in color like that probably no reason you can’t just go ahead and send the idiot himself is there?

— Possibly not sir but…

— Used to be the right people traveled all the idiots stayed put now nobody travels, haven’t been anywhere myself since they took out the Berengaria here hang these up. Now the right people stay put all you see’s the idiots and errand boys being flown around like bundles don’t know where they’re going don’t even know where they’ve been line them up like an infantry regiment and telegraph them they wouldn’t know the damn difference, don’t cost us a nickel to sit things out while this reorganization gets underway see where Diamond fits in does it? Sounded like the reason that bunch had their eye on it’s why I want this tender to go right through, see this project come up with something and we run into an antitrust ruling leave us standing there with a wish in one hand and where the devil’s that young woman.

— Getting my Bananx while Beaton sits there with his…

— No I brought you some ma’am wait, it’s right here in…

— Give it to me then don’t just stand there with your thumb in your…

— Damn it Zona he’s not your nursemaid who the devil got you up here this morning, one place I thought I’d have some priva…

— Beaton got me up here this morning get this open Beaton.

— Beaton you tell her after this get her damn free pills someplace else, those two hundred thousand shares of Diamond she was sitting on as Boody’s guardian running around loose now no damn reason I have to listen to any more of her damn…