William Gaddis - J R

— Mean you’d better fix your trousers in front there first that’s all.

— What I, damn it why didn’t you… he paused half backed between the torrents on either side — Jack damn it you, why the hell you’re acting this way… he reached his free hand for the doorframe, backed from the light of the doorway — I, I don’t understand you…

— I know Tom… came after him in the dark of the hall where he turned, hand running on the rail feeling for the stairhead and suddenly down two steps at a time from the voice up there in the darkness, — I know… he made the door with a final tug at his waist and, hand plunged in an inside pocket as though to clutch the desperate consequence of the papers he’d found there, came out with the lunge of a man abruptly threatened by the weight of the overcast sky.

— Say excuse me, could you tell me where the…

— One flight up end of the hall, the door’s open…

— Want to move that truck buddy? You’re blocking the whole…

— What’s this kid in my car!

— Excuse me just let me get past here…

— Out of this God forsaken place, taxi? Taxi…!

— Watch where you’re pushing that junk heap you crazy bunch of, look out!

— Coño…!

— So who finally died?

— This green panel truck where’s the driver, tell him to get it the hell out of there.

— Excuse me I’m a reporter from…

— Hey Mister Bast we going to the movies?

— You’re not going anywhere no now get back in the cars, now where’s…

— Excuse me I’m a rep…

— You kids get away from that car I’ll bust your…

— Wait I thought these cars were hired for this school group…

— This here’s a private limousine now get that kid out… and the door swung open on the figure cringed in the back, battered portfolio spilling from knees quivering at anchor where a sneaker worked wedged in a gleaming hinge of the jump seat, — out!

— Private limousine what’s it doing here, they told me these…

— Come up to see my mother that’s what it’s doing here now get him and his pile of crap out of there before I…

— Okay okay holy…

— We going to the movies Mister Bast hey wait what happened to your…

— I told you to get back in those cars, come on J R hurry up…

— Okay how was I supposed to, wait could you hold this stuff a second while I…

— I can’t no I’m holding enough stuff now get in that first car up there, the rest of you get in the other two hurry up!

— Look at the cowboy coming hey!

— Be quiet just do what I no, it can’t be no…

— You getting in with me hey Bast? because boy I got this whole bunch of stuff to ask you like…

— Yes well I’ve got a whole bunch to ask you too just get in quick here, get these boxes before they slide off my…

— Wait look out for my…

— Well get the door closed!

— No but holy, I mean what happened to you anyways you…

— I’ve been on a bus for twenty-six hours I’ve got a cold I haven’t eaten since here look over my shoulder, is he out there? the man in the cowboy…

— He’s like standing there by these garbage cans looking up at this dump we’re parked at who’s he suppose to be, I mean what are we doing here anyways we…

— That’s what I’d like to know! that Mrs diCephalis when I saw her I thought I was having a…

— No but where are we, like we fix up this here whole field trip which Mister Davidoff gets these here limousines so we go to this Waldorf place where this general’s suppose to excort us which he’s not even there and Mister Davidoff they say he already went someplace and will we please leave so…

— Driver let’s, where is he where’s the driver…

— So like Mrs diCephalis is suppose to have this here headquarters address to meet you so then we ride around awhile and stop at this dump where she can go in that lousy looking place where its says bodeega to call and they tell her it’s this bomb scare then you come down the street in these here funny looking clothes with your…

— Just be quiet a minute where’s the driver where’s that woman look, go find…

— What Mrs diCephalis she already went in this taxicab she…

— What do you mean went, where…

— Well see she has to go to India to show them how to do birth control and all see she’s got social studies since Mrs Joubert went so she’s always telling us how everybody’s real poor down at India so mainly all they do is…

— Stop no stop, you mean she brought you all in here and dumped you and went to Ind…

— No see she has like this interview at this government thing someplace so she brings us in where it’s all fixed up with this here new principal this Mister Stye we got where Mister Davidoff thought it’s this neat publicity idea for where we’re like buying the school you know? So there’s suppose to be this photographer and these here box lunches and you’re suppose to excort us and take us around like, so now you come down this street with these wrecked up cars and garbage cans all over in this here funny looking suit with these ripped pants and your eye and all I mean didn’t Mister Davidoff even say to…

— How could look can’t you understand I just got off the never mind let’s just get out of here before here, get out your side get the driver and tell the other cars to follow hurry up…

— This truck here I can’t hardly, wait open your side hey he’s coming over this man in this cowboy…

— Will you do what I tell you!

— He’s knocking on the window wait how does it open there’s no turner thing how do you, look hey this button you just push…

— Damn it leave it…!

— Mister Bast thank heavens I’ve mercy! what’s happened…

— Hey who’s…

— I said get the driver!

— But what’s happened are you all right?

— I’m yes I’m fine yes Mister Brisboy I’m sorry we’re in a little hurry we…

— But what is it who are all these dreadful urchins Mister Bast I simply must talk to you Mother called she says she’s been fired! She’s simply livid of course that letter from your Piscator person about franchising out the entire health plan already had her in a perfect tizzy I know it’s all some sort of ghastly mistake, I told her I knew you wouldn’t stand for it of course you’re in rather deep yourself aren’t you and she’s seen all these frightful things in the papers I’ve had reporters battering at the door of my suite all morning, of course I’ve told them I won’t hear a word against you I know you’d never dream of knowingly doing such a thing but…

— Yes well I’m sorry Mister Brisboy I really don’t know all the details yet but…

— Oh I know I know they’re so fearfully rude aren’t they, whoever dreamt up that soubriquet gentlemen of the press must have been demented it might have been Kipling mightn’t it if there’s anything in the language more excruciating than his little ditty If thank heaven I’ve been spared it I simply don’t share the talents for dealing with them your crass little person with all the cufflinks…

— Mister Davidoff yes do you know where…

— Oh isn’t he yes I do think he rather revels in it, if you could have seen him this morning in the company suite making tales up faster than Scheherazade before they pranced off to court all baying after him like jackals about your J R person’s court appearance today in this business squabble, of course they’re merely whetting their carrion appetites for his squalid paternity suit I’m not one to point a finger you know, but I must say the vision of that Virginia person’s bulk wallowing unsheathed on a desktop does add a rather unsavory dimension to our little family of comp…