William Gaddis - J R

— Yes well I’m sorry Mister Brisboy I can’t really…

— But there’s no earthly reason you should Mister Bast your cold sounds perfectly ghastly and they are such bullies, whining about rude responses to their prying phone calls why I’ve talked with your Grynszpan person he sounds terribly gracious and I’ve had no difficulty at all finding the place we’re right in this quaint doorway aren’t we? I’d just rushed up to my analyst after this excruciating call from Mother so near your amusing neighborhood here I thought I’d run up for a chat…

— No what I meant was I’ve been away I don’t really know all the de…

— Oh your trip yes of course I simply can’t wait to hear every chilling detail, that hilarious story in the paper about the drunken brewer chasing you among the vats with a gun how fortunate the eye came through quite unscathed didn’t it, simply all that rather bilious discoloration thank heaven they got your good profile in that splendid picture in Indian attire I do so love pageantry, of course I sent it right off to Mother to reassure her after all these gloomy items in the paper when your stock stopped trading at four your Crawley person’s simply gaga over the whole thing isn’t he of course they say the poor man’s going under what a cutting wind! It does look so cozy in there I wonder if…

— No well I think we, I just sent someone to look for the driver I think he…

— That urchin yes he’s coming with him now of course you know I don’t approve your going at all you must be running a frightful fever but I know the courts cannot abide tardiness Mister Bast you must promise me one thing, you must not simply not permit yourself to fall victim to misguided loyalties you know I wouldn’t dream of sowing dissension but I simply must say your J R person does begin to sound rather un…

— Yes well we, driver? I think we’d bet…

— Just a second hey let me get my…

— of the confidence Mother and I have in you to mercy one just crept in beside you…

— Yes well it’s all driver we’d better leave goodbye…

— your own work I know you’ve had so little time but… waiting breathlessly to hear… only living soul I know with something worth doing…

— Hey holy…

— about the concert grand…? of a charming Chambolle-Musigny you’ll adore… care of yourself…

— Hey look he’s going to get run over if he runs along by us like that holy…

— found this delicious new Czech recording of the Kindertotenlieder…

— Yes goodbye, goodbye…

— to know you’re all we have left au voir au voir…

— No but who was that suppose to be hey.

— Just be quiet for a minute.

— Sure okay but I mean who was…

— Nobody! it, wasn’t supposed to be anybody…

— Okay I mean you don’t need to get mad hey you know what took me so long back there? This here tremendous truck that had us blocked in you know what it was hey what’s the matter your eye still hurts?

— Yes.

— Anyways what it was it was this whole shipment of these here ten thousand gross plastic flowers we got at this dock auction from Hong Kong so cheap because the colors were all screwed up you know?

— No.

— Like all these here red daffodils and blue roses and all see these here Chinamen which made them like they had pictures of the shape and all only they don’t have them real down at China like here so they just made up all these here dumb colors, I mean I heard this dopey truck-driver he’s yelling about all this plastic crap in his truck from Hong Kong I thought it’s these here sweaters we sent over there to make them for Eagle I mean didn’t they even come yet? And I mean it’s both suppose to go up to Union Falls anyways like what’s he doing yelling around that dump about J R Corp this address, this here big delivery at J R Corp this address what’s he…

— You wanted a low-cost operation didn’t you!

— Sure but holy, I mean, I mean holy…

— Sixty-one forty a month what did you expect for sixty-one forty! what do you think I’ve been…

— No but, no but I mean holy, I mean that was it this here whole world headquarters? that, that dump…?

— Well how do you think we…

— No but, no…

— Down Park sir?

— Down Park down anything driver it doesn’t…

— No but wait hey Bast we’re not going back now are we how come you…

— Because it’s the only way I can get a ride home that’s why, because I’ve…

— No but we only…

— Because I’ve got exactly thirty-seven cents that’s why! because I’ve got to get rid of these clothes because I’ve got a cold and a fever and my head’s splitting that’s why! Because I haven’t slept I haven’t eaten since that box give it to me, that white box…

— No but…

— Take the other one eat it go ahead open it eat it it’s your, one of your forty-eight cent tax dollar box lunches your neat guy Davidoff got for this so-called what made you do this anyhow, now today what made you do it!

— It just, it seemed like a good idea…

— Well it wasn’t it wasn’t a good idea, of all the…

— I wanted to see it! I, I just, wanted…

— All right don’t, here get your foot down have you got a handkerchief?

— Sure just, just a second…

— No you, use it. Stop sniffling and use it.

— I just, always, I mean I always thought this is what it will be like you and, and me riding in this here big limousine down, down this, this here big street…

— Well we, we are, here…

— No I, I mean like we…

— I know what you mean here, eat your sandwich.

— But, okay… hey?

— What.

— Right there that big white place, what is it…

— A club an embassy 1 don’t know, why.

— I just always thought we’d, we’d, nothing. You want your pickle?

— No.

— Like I’ll trade it for half my…

— Just take it!

— Okay I mean you don’t have to get mad about it, I just…

— I’m not mad about it about a damn pickle haven’t you heard anything I’ve said? Don’t you know where I’ve been what’s going on out there haven’t you seen the…

— Like that’s what I’m trying to find out only you keep interrupting, I mean this here whole big thing where you’re dressed up in this neat Indian wait a second it’s under here…

— Look that’s yesterday’s paper I mean what just hap…

— No but I mean all this expense we went to and all and this old chief giving you this here pipe he looks like he’s wearing this cheap kid’s Indian suit with these crumby chicken feathers sticking up and like who’s this old fart standing back here looks like a…

— That’s Senator Milliken and those are crumby chicken feathers, when I got up in this fancy dress Davidoff rented for three hundred dollars Charley Yellow Brook’s father showed up for the picture in smelly jeans and that idiot with the appliances said he didn’t look like a real Indian, he sent that stupid kid of his to the dime store and that’s what he brought back size eight that’s what started things off…

— I know it tells about it in this here neat story, echoing to the dip of paddles the hum of arrows and the legendary cry Howee! the dramatic reenactment of history unfolding here today promises to rekindle tribal hopes and loyalties smoldering from bygone times like the coals of some forgotten campf…

— Look this here neat story was written before anything happened like that picture, it was taken before they’d been pushed too far and exploded can’t you understand that? It’s a press release your neat guy Davidoff wrote from the script what he wanted to happen not what really happened, it was handed out the night before to get it in the papers the same day the…