William Gaddis - J R

— Man come help me here!

— Note the fine binding and paper stock, the quality printing, the intensity of the many color illustrations in addition to these each volume contains detailed charts, diagrams and graphs to enhance your exciting journeys through these pages of the world’s history, culture, civilization, government, history, art and literature and and, and science yes for though written and designed to inspire and reward the child’s thirst for knowledge this is in fact no mere children’s encyclopedia but the ideal reference work for the casual browser, the armchair traveler, the dedicated scholar alike, the crowning result of many untold thousands of hours of painstaking research by world renowned schol, is, is this the, the gentleman of the house…?

— It’s the fucking armchair traveler what does it look like now get your foot out of…

— Madam madam I see I am speaking to a lady of liberated opinion as a special inducement our publishers have also set aside in your name a charter subscription to a new publication designed especially for you the exciting new magazine She at absolutely no obligation be the first of your friends and neighbors to thrill to…

— Got his God damned foot caught under the…

— Thank you if you will just give me your name and sign here sir or mad…

— Lake get it down by the hinge and push, man…

— Thank you perhaps your neighbors will be more receptive to our generous offer if you will, sir if you will kindly just return the fine vol oww…

— Harder man harder till it’s all the way, wow… she led back in past the tub, — like I mean why’d you take it I mean that’s all we need here another fucking book… and she brought the punctured shade to light with a punch — I mean if we had that quarter like where’s the raviolis, you ate them?

— No no grape whisky just fine thanks… he steadied against Won’t Burn, Smoke or Smell coming down, — peruse this fine volume…

She got the jar from the floor — I mean what’s the matter with the raviolis… licked fingers, paper tore — like I mean why don’t you just go out to dinner then dear friend, complimentary tickets are being reserved in your name for the Second Anniversary Dinner of Rancho Hacienda Estates, a full course dinner will be served and you will view a fascinating motion picture, informal dress banquet room man I mean you could really go…

— Lost your pants both go, they all clap when we arose for your sweet…

— Informal dress like you could really go man I mean you should look at yourself, I mean you’re like already shaving when I went and I come back you’re sitting here stoned like I mean you didn’t even shave.

— No been, been typing found the typewriter been typing…

— Typing what. Man I mean you’re like waiting this hundred years for this big chance so everybody should drop dead when you come in and find this dirty folder and these Tootsie Roll notes and then I mean I come back and you’re like sitting here stoned watching this wad of gum out the…

— Tootsie notes can’t find them no typing, found the typewriter been typing…

— Can’t find them man they’re like right behind you and I mean typing what. I mean the typewriter there’s no paper in it man, look… her leg fell wide leaning forward to turn the roller, — sit down I mean look there’s no fucking paper in it man there’s nothing look out! you’re tipping that whole thing over…

— What I just, tipping not tipping typing said typing whole God damned thing over I, God damn it…

— There didn’t I tell you you’re tipping it over? And I mean the box says Tootsie Rolls all over it like I mean you can’t find your notes man they just found you…

— Christ… he came back down slowly, got a foot out dredging the papers together — God damned Pandora box follow me around how many God damned thousand hours in it sixteen years, live with it sixteen years begin to look for it in bookstores come back waiting like you left it publish ten years ago it…

— Man be careful you’re tearing…

— Sixteen years like living with a God damned invalid sixteen years every time you come in sitting there waiting just like you left him wave his stick at you, plump up his pillow cut a paragraph add a sentence hold his God damned hand little warm milk add a comma slip out for some air pack of cigarettes come back in right where you left him, eyes follow you around the room wave his God damned stick figure out what the hell he wants, plump the God damned pillow change bandage read aloud move a clause around wipe his chin new paragraph God damned eyes follow you out stay a week, stay a month whole God damned year think about something else, God damned friends asking how’s he coming along all expect him out any day don’t want bad news no news rather hear lies, big smile out any day now, walk down the street God damned sunshine begin to think maybe you’ll meet him maybe cleared things up got out by himself come back open the God damned door right there where you left him…

— Man that quarter out there… she’d sunk back, a hand dropped scratching where her leg lay fallen wide — did you stick it there man?

— Told you come in look out one eye yellow other eye seeing green try to put two God damned thoughts together make an idea… he caught his balance on H-O, reached the blue folder — God damned friends getting indignant tell you bring him out, tell you bring him out like he is little crippled maybe don’t give a God damn, quick and dirty just dress him up a little bring him out anyhow go back waiting, plump the God damned pillow move a clause around…

— Did you man? glue that quarter there?

— Told you tale, tale… pages flapped under his hand — for though the tale left right here for though the God damned eyes wipe his chin wave his stick figure out what the hell he, for though, for now the pencil where’s a pencil God damned clauses look just turned around pencil quick…

— You did didn’t you man, you glued it didn’t you…

— Clauses turn right around look. For now long after Wilde had withdrawn to join the compost smoldering in Europe with Pater’s recipe for success in life, the tale how for art’s sake he’d faced Leadville’s bullies to a standoff continued to amuse here where invention was eliminating the very possibility of failure as a condition for success precisely in the arts where one’s best is never good enough and who, now the song would play on without losing a note, could resist the temptation to shoot the pianist? How’s that.

— How’s what. Look man I mean…

— What don’t like it?

— No I mean I don’t get it, like I mean I don’t even understand it.

— God damned problem not read to be written aloud you read it then start here read it, here.

— What like here? The only rat, rational method of art criticism I have ever come across Wilde had observed, now elsewhere and dead, a mildewed chimp, and Ste…

— Chump God damn it says chump not chimp, here…

— It says chimp man look chimp, c h i…

— Chump mildewed chump think Crane call Wilde a God damned chimp?

— Man how do I look out, I mean that’s my ankle…

— Chimp make it sound stupid don’t you, hate it try to make it sound stupid…

— Hate it man like how can I hate it I mean I don’t even know what it’s about…

— Shoot the God damned pianist what it’s about just told you, player piano play by itself get to shoot the pianist just read it God damn it says it right here, here where invention was eliminating the very possibility of failure as a condition for success precisely in the God damned arts there, says it right there.

— It says what, I mean this player piano where does it say that.