William Gaddis - J R

— I just brought you some coffee Mister Eigen, you looked like you can use it.

— Thanks just, yes just put it there, Jack? I thought you could look for him in some of those places down… no I know it but the first race isn’t till one o’clock is it? You can… what? What idea you had last night, all you talked about was… No all you talked about last night were these two horses look if… no but look Jack if you’d had an idea last night that would make a million dollars I’d remember the, just a second, what’s all this Florence?

— The pictures and captions for the Annual Report Mister Eigen, Miss Flesch wants to know if…

— Yes just a second Florence, Jack…? What do you mean something to do with Baby Jeeter, just a second, Carol?

— Mister Eigen there’s this young man waiting to see you Mister Gall, he says Miss Flesch said that you’d…

— Just tell him to wait a minute, I… what? No what about what suitcase…? No look never mind it whatever it is, I have to get off the… Yes by the dishrack, I told you I’d left two tens by the… no in the kitchen where the hell else would the… the dishrack in the kitchen yes… Yes if I remember your idea I’ll write it down, yes… No I told you there were clean shirts in that suitcase in by the bed look Jack I have to get off, call me later… he hung up. — Who’s this waiting Carol?

— This Mister Gall Mister Eigen, he’s this writer friend of this man that’s in with Miss Flesch and he says she said Mister Davidoff said he had some project he…

— Yes all right send him in, now what’s all this again Florence?

— The pictures for the Annual Report Mister Eigen, Mister Davidoff had some airbrush work done on them and had a set sent out to those schoolchildren but Miss…

— Just tell her I’m still working on the captions, Mister Gall? Come in and, Carol where’s my other chair.

— Oh I’m sorry Mister Eigen I think Miss Flesch borrowed it to put some plants…

— Well see if there’s another one out there someplace will you? Sorry… he reached across to shake hands, — things seem to be…

— No that’s all right that’s all right I, but are you, you’re not the Thomas Eigen? Because I, I mean there was no picture of you on the jacket of your book so I…

— I didn’t want one I, I’m just surprised that you…

— No I always wanted to meet you but I guess I, I mean I’m just surprised to suddenly meet you in an office like this, oh thank you… he pulled the chair through the door, bent to brush the dirt off the seat. — I wrote to you the first time I read it, in care of the publisher I guess you never got it but I think it’s the most important book I, one of the most important books in American literature and I, since I’m a writer I mean trying to be a writer I…

— Well it’s nice of you to say that… he tipped his own chair back, caught the edge of the file drawer with the sole of his shoe and pulled it out far enough to prop his feet up on it, — a million more like you and I’d be…

— But you must have known when you were writing it, you must have known you were writing it for a very small audience, I…

— Small audience! his feet dropped, — do you think I would have worked on it for seven years just for, do you know what my last royalty check was Mister…

— Gall, I…

— Mister Gall? Fifty-three dollars and fifty-two cents, the publisher dropped it cold the day it came out he must think I wrote it for a very small audience too.

— Yes I know I…

— I get letters from college kids who have it assigned in their courses, they must be passing one copy around. If he’d let me have the rights back do you think I’d be sitting here now?

— Yes I know, I mean I’ve been working on a Western I can finish if I can get an advance on this book about cobalt or whatever it is for your company, then with the final payment on the Western I’ll be able to get far enough on the cobalt book to collect the second payment and settle things with this Foundation where they’re handing out grants to novelists who want to write plays and I…

— Yes I’ve been working on a play myself… he tilted back, got his feet up on the file drawer again — I think I…

— Yes well to get a grant you have to be a novelist not a playwright but you have to be writing a play not a novel, I’ve applied for that under the name Jim Blake because that’s the name I wrote another Western novel under called Guns of God and if I can change the novel I’m working on now into a play for just long enough to get a grant I…

— It’s good discipline yes, the play I’m working on now in fact, it started as a novel, sent the first chapter and an outline in to this publisher and got back a fatuous five page…

— Yes well before I knew about these fourteen thousand dollar grants I’d already taken a job from another part of the same Foundation to write a book on school television for a lousy five thousand dollars. I worked on that while I was living on the advance I got for this Western and when I took it in half finished I thought I’d use that payment to go back and finish the Western, and then the Foundation just canceled the whole thing. I’ve been trying to reach the man in charge of it there ever since but it’s like trying to reach Klamm in The Castle, he’s always busy, always out, never returns a call and now their comptroller’s after me for a five hundred dollar expense advance, I told him I’ll settle it when they settle with me on the book but he says it’s a different kind of money and I…

— Lake to meet just one of them who’d come right out and say he’s really in it for the money, this publisher of mine names himself a six-figure salary I’ve heard he’s written three novels himself, finally hid them in a drawer when his own poor God damn editors read them and had to plead with him not to publish them so Christ awful they were afraid he’d embarrass the whole, yes Carol?

— Mister Eigen Miss Flesch wants to know if you…

— Look just tell her I’m talking to Mister Gall about this book project, she…

— Yes well this friend of mine who’s in there talking to her now is taking over the old publishing house he’s been working for, if he gets the contract for this book about cobalt and I can get an advance from him on it and get back to this play I…

— Yes just a second, Florence?

— Mister Eigen, Miss Flesch wants to know where the…

— Look just, never mind damn it… his feet came down, — can’t get a damn thing done here…

— I’ve already written the first act, came on behind him toward the door, — but somebody who read it said the trouble with it is my main character… pursued him to the dirt heaps, stopped short by the voice from the half opened door ahead.

— It’s teachers that make the problems the kids have a ball, all the a v equipment tapes films textbooks slides all that stuff and junk, Carol? Will somebody out there pick up my phone? So when they called I told them what he told me once this product integration followthrough from cable to closed-circuit broadcast with the packaged a v software to go with it Florence did Carol pick up my phone? You have public relations whether you want them or not and I told him PRwise it can’t hurt the company imagewise the medium and the message and all that bla bla bla but he said we couldn’t get corporate support for all this publishing stuff and junk without support from the company and all they’re talking about now is budgets and all that bla bla bla, Carol? Was that the Times calling back Florence?

— It’s Mister Beaton’s office Miss Flesch, they want…

— Omigosh is Mister Eigen out there Florence? Will you see what they want?