Chris Abani - GraceLand

“Why does nobody listen to me? I am not going back to school. I want to be a dancer, period. I am really good at it, have worked hard at it.”

“At least think about it.”

“In America I can become very famous doing what I do.”

She got up and began to clear the plates away. He watched silently, not offering to help.

“You won’t help?” she asked.

“No. You need to practice your wifely duties before you join your husband.”

“You are a fool,” she said, stalking off with the plates.

He laughed and followed her to the kitchen. He opened the fridge and helped himself to a beer while she soaked the dishes.

“Take it easy on de beer,” she said.

“They can afford it.”

“Madam, let me,” the house girl said, relieving Felicia of the dishes she still held. Reluctantly she let them go. Elvis watched the exchange, and kissing his teeth disdainfully, he went back out on the balcony.

“What is it?” Felicia asked, following him.

“Why do your friends need a servant?”

“Oh, get off your high horse. We had servants when you were younger. You are so angry all de time. What happened to your joy?” she said, taking the beer bottle from him and swigging.

He wrestled it back from her. “I don’t remember us having servants.”

“It seems dere is a lot you do not remember,” she said.

“What do you mean?”

“When are you going to ask me about Oye?”

He said nothing, looking away.

“Elvis. She was your grandmother. You two were inseparable when you were a boy.”

“You said ‘was.’”

“Yes. She died last year. Didn’t you know she was ill?”

“I did, but my father wouldn’t let me come.”

“Just like with my wedding.”

“That is not fair.”

“She kept asking for you. Asking if you still remembered her.”

“Of course I remember her!”

“Don’t snap at me. Anyway, she wanted me to tell you she forgave you for all the tricks you played on her as a boy.”

“So she knew all along,” he said.

“Of course she knew. She was a witch. She told me everything.”

“If she knew, then why didn’t she say anything?”

Felicia shrugged. “I never understood my mother. Maybe she liked what you made up, your stories. Perhaps she needed dem, who knows? De important thing is she forgave you.”

“How did she die?”

“Like your mother. Peacefully, in her sleep.”

“That is good.”

“Yes it is. Dere is something else. She believed Efua was here in Lagos. Dat she came looking for you. I think it would make Oye happy if you tried to find her.”

“Lagos is big. She could be anywhere,” he said. “Was it her dying wish?”

“Why?”

“Because then I have to do it. You cannot refuse the dying their last wish,” he replied.

“Where do you get dese things? You are just as bad as her, inventing de world,” she said, glancing at her watch.

He caught the look. “It is getting late,” he said.

Lifting his shirt, he opened the Fulani pouch hanging there and put the postcard and envelope into it next to Beatrice’s journal. The Bible was too big to fit.

“What is dat?” she asked.

“A Fulani pouch — the cowherds carry their valuables in them. My friend Redemption has one.”

“And cowherds wear it with such a thick chain?”

“This is Lagos,” he said with a shrug, picking up the Bible.

She walked him to the door and hugged him for a long time.

“I will miss you.”

“Me too.”

Letting go, she watched him walk out and down the stairs to the street door. He turned and waved one last time before opening the door and stepping into the darkness.

PSALM 23

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.

He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

We have always done things this way.

The kola-nut ceremony is part hospitality, part etiquette, part protocol and part history lesson. Unlike the Japanese tea ceremony, women take no part in the kola-nut ritual. In fact, female guests are never presented with kola nuts.

Afikpo, 1980

Rushing to get ready for school, Elvis sidestepped his aunt Felicia’s constant nagging.

“I’ve told you before to stop staying out so late,” she railed. “One of dese days you will get caught.”

“Especially if you keep announcing it so loudly,” Elvis replied.

“Watch your mouth, boy, before I watch it for you,” she warned sternly.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, stepping into the starch-stiff, tarplike green shorts. Though he was thirteen and she only nineteen, she treated him like he was six. When he complained to Oye, she laughed and told him not to worry.

“She’s your mother sister. She’s trying to make you forget tha’ you lost your mother so young.”

Oye always had an explanation for everything, but they were seldom satisfactory to Elvis.

“Leave your shirt off until after breakfast so you don’t stain it,” Felicia cautioned as he slipped on an undershirt.

“Okay,” he said sitting on the edge of the bed, watching her putting on her makeup, fascinated by the deep flake of her powderpatted cheeks, the cherry pout of her lips and the heavy blue eye shadow that made her look older. He was amazed not just at how much makeup made her aware of herself, but by how much he wanted to wear that mask. It would be the perfect remedy for his painful shyness. She smacked her lips together over a piece of tissue to blot the lipstick, making him squirm uncomfortably. It seemed to him like she smiled knowingly, but he couldn’t be sure.

Her cheap perfume was acrid, and he sneezed as he watched her check her reflection one last time in the cracked mirror. He envied her this ability to prepare a face for the world. To change it any time she liked. Be different people just by a gentle hint of shadow here, a dash of color there. She could even change her hair to suit her mood: sometimes wearing huge Afro wigs that scoured the sky’s underbelly; other times, the elegant plaited stalks called mercy, as though they were stakes in a hunter’s trap, or the playful run of cornrows — his favorite.

“Why are you sitting dere daydreaming instead of going to breakfast?” she demanded in a shrill tone, shocking Elvis from his reverie. She was already at the door on her way out. “Come on!”

“I’m coming.”

As she clacked out on six-inch platforms, riding on the echo of her teeth kissing, he reached into the wastebasket for the tissue that wore her lip shape in distinct red. He pressed the paper lips against his, eyes closed, inhaling all of her. Dropping the tissue back into the wastebasket, he fingered her wig on its wicker stand.

“Elvis!”

“Coming!” he replied, grabbing his schoolbag and shirt and heading for the dining room. His father sat at the table reading the paper. The headline caught Elvis’s attention: MILITARY TO STEP DOWN. That was strange; Elvis could not remember when the military had not run the country. His father spoke often and nostalgically about his days as a member of parliament in the first republic, but to Elvis it sounded suspiciously like all his father’s stories. Like the one about being made to walk forty miles each way to school every day as a child. Or the one about hunting a lion with his father, Elvis’s grandfather, armed with nothing but native broadswords. Of course his father did not know that in general science, Elvis had learned that lions had been extinct in this part of the country since the twenties. But he never challenged him. That attracted an angry telling off, at best; at worst, a slap. His father could slap well too. The initial impact stung, and for hours after, a strange heat persisted, reminding you of your transgression all day until it burned out as a lumpy bruise.