Karl Pilkington - The World of Karl Pilkington

Karl: Yeah, they wouldn’t of survived. But I think people sort of thought, ‘good on him for trying’. But anyway, I went round to the house with the horse ’cos I thought their house could do with a bit of colour and brightening up and that.

Ricky: The horse went, ‘Thank God for that – breakfast! They’ve been feeding me Kit-e-kat.’

Karl: So I go up to the door and they open the door and it’s one of them houses where there’s no carpet …

Steve: And a horse in the living room. We’ve all been there.

Karl: And the horse was walking round the living room. And it looked quite happy and everything because …

Ricky: Black Beauty was on?

Karl: But think about it right; if you were a horse, where would you rather be? In a little wooden hut with a load of hay? Or in a house with a three-piece suite and a telly and that?

Ricky: A telly and that.

Karl: I was saying this the other day. I was walking through London the other day with Suzanne and do you know how homeless people always have dogs? She said, ‘Oh I hope they look after it’ and I said, ‘What you on about? That dog is happier than most dogs because people always walk past and give it a pat on the head; it’s with its owner all the time; it’s out in the open not locked up in the house.’

Steve: ‘It doesn’t eat, but other than that …’

Karl: No it does eat. They’re always alright. So that’s what I was saying, I think this horse was doing alright for itself.

Ricky: Well, yes, not many horses have got their own house for a start.

Karl: But anyway, that’s not what we were talking about. We were talking about …

Steve: … Genetically modified kids.

Karl: Yeah. What I’m saying is, you could have a baby, right, Steve, and Ricky could see it and say, ‘God, I want one that looks like that.’

Steve: It could happen Rick, come on, work with him.

Karl: So you take it to the doctors and … I don’t know what they do with it, they inject it with summit or whatever…

Steve: Yep, that’s how it’s done.

Karl: And you get a little baby and there it is – it looks the same. Now you both go off and do your own things, right. Steve, you look after your baby, you treat it well, you give it good food and that.

Steve: Yes, well I’m a good dad.

Karl: But Ricky just gives his cheese. So it changes its looks, it goes a bit fat, it gets tired easily. Now this family…

Ricky: Why am I just feeding a baby cheese?

Karl: Now this family who had a horse in the house, they had a little baby and me mam went round and came back and said, ‘You’re not gonna believe this but it’s a beautiful little baby.’ And the weird thing was it was a good looking kid but as time went on they didn’t really look after it – I’m not saying they abused it – but it used to run around and play out ’til ten at night, it used to chase cars …

Steve: Right. Did it have hooves?

Ricky: It used to chase cars? What sort of kid chases cars? Was it called ‘Rover’? Did it fetch sticks?

Karl: The weird thing is, it was a good looking kid but as time went on and all that not eating properly, its hair was all patchy and it became an ugly kid. And that’s what I’m saying, right; you can clone all you like but at the end of the day, it’s how you’re brought up.

Steve: Man alive, that was one hell of a point.

Karl: But am I right?

Ricky: Er … you’re always right, Karl.

Текст предоставлен ООО «ЛитРес».

Прочитайте эту книгу целиком, купив полную легальную версию на ЛитРес.

Безопасно оплатить книгу можно банковской картой Visa, MasterCard, Maestro, со счета мобильного телефона, с платежного терминала, в салоне МТС или Связной, через PayPal, WebMoney, Яндекс.Деньги, QIWI Кошелек, бонусными картами или другим удобным Вам способом.