David Walliams - The Beast of Buckingham Palace

There was a narrow gap in the curtains, and Alfred manoeuvred himself closer to the glass, so he could peek through.

The lights were out, and the room was dark.

But the light of a candle flickered in the gloom.

There was a lone figure with their back to the window. Who were they? And what were they doing?

It was hard to make out. Alfred kept very still and watched.

Someone was trying to force open the cabinet that held the most special books. Frantically, though. As if their life depended on it.

Alfred pressed his face right up against the window to get a better look, but as he did so he lost his footing for a moment, and his head hit the glass.

THUNK!

Immediately, the candle was blown out, and the library was plunged into darkness.

Alfred moved out of sight of the window.

Just then a searchlight came towards him.

Were the royal guards going to shoot him from the ground?

Alfred stayed as still as the stone gargoyle right next to him on the wall of the palace as the searchlight passed over him. The prince didn’t even dare take a breath.

Then he heard the sound of the window opening.

SHUNT!

Just as he tried to hurry back up the drainpipe, a hand reached out of the window, and yanked him inside.

“ARGH!” he screamed.

*Human jam is considered to be the most revolting of all the jams. Other unpopular varieties include:

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