David Baddiel - The Taylor TurboChaser

“What, meaninglessly?”

“Yes,” said Amy.

Suzi sighed. “Right. I promise I won’t get upset.”

Rahul, who was standing by the side of the garage with a new remote control, pressed the button. The door came up halfway towards Amy, Suzi and Jack. Then stopped.

“Rahul! I thought you said you were going to get a grown-up to fix the garage door?” said Amy.

“I was. But my dad wasn’t bothered.”

“I wasn’t bothered!” shouted Sanjay from somewhere in the warehouse.

“He said as long as it opens eventually, what’s the rush?”

“What’s the rush?” Sanjay shouted again.

“So you made that remote control?” said Amy.

“I did,” said Rahul, pressing the button again. The door shook, but didn’t move.

“Hmm. I’m starting to worry about your inventing capabilities.”

“NOT AS MUCH AS I AM!”

They looked round. It was Suzi who had shouted. It was definitely her, even though they could only see her bottom half, under the garage door. Which she’d crept under while they were talking.

“I think your mum might have found the Taylor TurboChaser …” said Rahul.

“Yes,” said Amy. “I think she might.”

“HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!”

“I think your brother might have found it too.”

Amy wheeled herself under the door, followed by Rahul. When they were both inside the garage, they waited, for about a minute, for Suzi to turn round.

Suzi, though, was just staring and staring at what had become of Amy’s new wheelchair. It seemed for so long that Amy began to hope that perhaps her mum had started to like it.

Eventually Amy said, hopefully: “It’s called the Taylor TurboChaser … ZX115.”

This, finally, made Suzi turn round.

Her face was looking very pale.

There was a long pause.

“WHAT ARE YOU THINKING OF AMY WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WHAT EVEN IS IT NOW IT DOESN’T EVEN LOOK LIKE A WHEELCHAIR IT JUST LOOKS MAD WHAT AM I GOING TO TELL YOUR FATHER OH MY LORD AMY YOU ARE THE END OF THE WORLD!”

“Mum,” said Amy, realising that, no, her mum hadn’t started to like it, “you promised you wouldn’t get upset.”

“MEANINGLESSLY!”

“It’s great, Mum! It goes really fast!”

“It does, Mrs Taylor!” said Rahul. “It’s like a wheelchair supercar!”

“Oh, fantastic. Thanks, Rahul. Really. Not only have you made Amy’s new wheelchair look like a mad thing from … from …”

“Mario Kart,” said Jack, very seriously (the only thing he didn’t joke about was video games).

“ Mario Kart? ” said Rahul. “I think it’s much more like something from Grand Theft Auto.”

“Mario Kart,” said Jack firmly. “Be glad I didn’t say Yoshi.”

“I think there is a bit of an element of Mater, the truck from Cars ,” said Sanjay, who had bent himself under the door to see what all these people were doing in his garage.

“That’s what I think Mum’s van looks like,” said Amy.

“Anyway, that is actually a video game as well as a movie,” said Jack.

“HELLO?” said Suzi. “CAN WE STOP TALKING ABOUT WHAT VIDEO-GAME CAR IT LOOKS LIKE?”

“Well, you were the one trying to think of something,” said Amy.

“YES! BECAUSE THERE’S NEVER BEEN ANY WHEELCHAIR THAT’S EVER LOOKED LIKE THAT! BUT NOW YOU TELL ME IT GOES REALLY FAST AS WELL? SO YOU’RE GOING TO KILL YOURSELF IN A CROSS BETWEEN A DUMP TRUCK, A SOFA AND AN AQUARIUM?”

Everyone looked at the Taylor TurboChaser.

“Good shout,” said Sanjay. “That pretty much sums it up.”

“It’s my dream, Mum …” said Amy, her voice wobbling ever so slightly. “I’m trying to make it come true.”

Suzi looked at her. Her face – and voice – softened.

“Oh, Amy. I understand that. But—”

Click!

“What was that?” said Amy. They all turned round. Jack was standing a little way away, having clearly just taken a photo of the vehicle with his phone. Which he was holding out. Then he looked down at his screen and started tapping.

“Jack!” said Amy. “Don’t put it on Instagram!”

“I’m not!” said Jack.

“Oh, OK.”

“I’ve put it on my Snapchat Stories.”

“Oh no!” said Amy.

“What’s the problem?”

“Dad checks your Snapchat!” she screamed.

“He does ?” said Jack.

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