GEORGE SHAW - Collected Works

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This Collected Works contains:
An Unsocial Socialist
Androcles and the Lion
Annajanska, the Bolshevik Empress
Arms and the Man
Augustus Does His Bit: A True-to-Life Farce
Back to Methuselah: A Metabiological Pentateuch
Caesar and Cleopatra
Candida
Candida: Ein Mysterium in drei Akten
Captain Brassbound's Conversion
Cashel Byron's Profession
Fanny's First Play
Getting Married
Great Catherine (Whom Glory Still Adores)
Heartbreak House
How He Lied to Her Husband
John Bull's Other Island
Major Barbara
Man and Superman: A Comedy and a Philosophy
Maxims for Revolutionists
Misalliance
Mrs. Warren's Profession
O'Flaherty V.C.: A Recruiting Pamphlet
On the Prospects of Christianity / Bernard Shaw's Preface to Androcles and the Lion
Overruled
Preface to Major Barbara: First Aid to Critics
Press Cuttings
Pygmalion
Revolutionist's Handbook and Pocket Companion
The Admirable Bashville; Or, Constancy Unrewarded / Being the Novel of Cashel Byron's Profession Done into a Stage Play in Three Acts and in Blank Verse, with a Note on Modern Prize Fighting
The Dark Lady of the Sonnets
The Devil's Disciple
The Doctor's Dilemma
The Doctor's Dilemma: Preface on Doctors
The Impossibilities of Anarchism
The Inca of Perusalem: An Almost Historical Comedietta
The Irrational Knot / Being the Second Novel of His Nonage
The Man of Destiny
The Miraculous Revenge
The Perfect Wagnerite: A Commentary on the Niblung's Ring
The Philanderer
The Shewing-up of Blanco Posnet
Treatise on Parents and Children
You Never Can Tell
George Bernard Shaw was an Irish playwright, critic, polemicist and political activist. His influence on Western theatre, culture and politics extended from the 1880s to his death and beyond. He wrote more than sixty plays, including major works such as Man and Superman (1902) and Pygmalion (1912). With a range incorporating both contemporary satire and historical allegory, Shaw became the leading dramatist of his generation, and in 1925 was awarded the Nobel Prize in Literature.

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RAINA.

( crouching on the bed ). Who’s there? ( The match is out instantly. ) Who’s there? Who is that?

A MAN’S VOICE.

( in the darkness, subduedly, but threateningly ). Sh—sh! Don’t call out or you’ll be shot. Be good; and no harm will happen to you. ( She is heard leaving her bed, and making for the door. ) Take care, there’s no use in trying to run away. Remember, if you raise your voice my pistol will go off. ( Commandingly. ) Strike a light and let me see you. Do you hear? ( Another moment of silence and darkness. Then she is heard retreating to the dressing-table. She lights a candle, and the mystery is at an end. A man of about 35, in a deplorable plight, bespattered with mud and blood and snow, his belt and the strap of his revolver case keeping together the torn ruins of the blue coat of a Servian artillery officer. As far as the candlelight and his unwashed, unkempt condition make it possible to judge, he is a man of middling stature and undistinguished appearance, with strong neck and shoulders, a roundish, obstinate looking head covered with short crisp bronze curls, clear quick blue eyes and good brows and mouth, a hopelessly prosaic nose like that of a strong-minded baby, trim soldierlike carriage and energetic manner, and with all his wits about him in spite of his desperate predicament—even with a sense of humor of it, without, however, the least intention of trifling with it or throwing away a chance. He reckons up what he can guess about Raina—her age, her social position, her character, the extent to which she is frightened—at a glance, and continues, more politely but still most determinedly ) Excuse my disturbing you; but you recognise my uniform—Servian. If I’m caught I shall be killed. ( Determinedly. ) Do you understand that?

RAINA.

Yes.

MAN.

Well, I don’t intend to get killed if I can help it. ( Still more determinedly. ) Do you understand that? ( He locks the door with a snap. )

RAINA.

( disdainfully ). I suppose not. ( She draws herself up superbly, and looks him straight in the face, saying with emphasis ) Some soldiers, I know, are afraid of death.

MAN.

( with grim goodhumor ). All of them, dear lady, all of them, believe me. It is our duty to live as long as we can, and kill as many of the enemy as we can. Now if you raise an alarm—

RAINA.

( cutting him short ). You will shoot me. How do you know that I am afraid to die?

MAN.

( cunningly ). Ah; but suppose I don’t shoot you, what will happen then? Why, a lot of your cavalry—the greatest blackguards in your army—will burst into this pretty room of yours and slaughter me here like a pig; for I’ll fight like a demon: they shan’t get me into the street to amuse themselves with: I know what they are. Are you prepared to receive that sort of company in your present undress? ( Raina, suddenly conscious of her nightgown, instinctively shrinks and gathers it more closely about her. He watches her, and adds, pitilessly ) It’s rather scanty, eh? ( She turns to the ottoman. He raises his pistol instantly, and cries ) Stop! ( She stops. ) Where are you going?

RAINA.

( with dignified patience ). Only to get my cloak.

MAN.

( darting to the ottoman and snatching the cloak ). A good idea. No: I’ll keep the cloak: and you will take care that nobody comes in and sees you without it. This is a better weapon than the pistol. ( He throws the pistol down on the ottoman. )

RAINA.

( revolted ). It is not the weapon of a gentleman!

MAN.

It’s good enough for a man with only you to stand between him and death. ( As they look at one another for a moment, Raina hardly able to believe that even a Servian officer can be so cynically and selfishly unchivalrous, they are startled by a sharp fusillade in the street. The chill of imminent death hushes the man’s voice as he adds ) Do you hear? If you are going to bring those scoundrels in on me you shall receive them as you are. ( Raina meets his eye with unflinching scorn. Suddenly he starts, listening. There is a step outside. Someone tries the door, and then knocks hurriedly and urgently at it. Raina looks at the man, breathless. He throws up his head with the gesture of a man who sees that it is all over with him, and, dropping the manner which he has been assuming to intimidate her, flings the cloak to her, exclaiming, sincerely and kindly ) No use: I’m done for. Quick! wrap yourself up: they’re coming!

RAINA.

( catching the cloak eagerly ). Oh, thank you. ( She wraps herself up with great relief. He draws his sabre and turns to the door, waiting. )

LOUKA.

( outside, knocking ). My lady, my lady! Get up, quick, and open the door.

RAINA.

( anxiously ). What will you do?

MAN.

( grimly ). Never mind. Keep out of the way. It will not last long.

RAINA.

( impulsively ). I’ll help you. Hide yourself, oh, hide yourself, quick, behind the curtain. ( She seizes him by a torn strip of his sleeve, and pulls him towards the window. )

MAN.

( yielding to her ). There is just half a chance, if you keep your head. Remember: nine soldiers out of ten are born fools. ( He hides behind the curtain, looking out for a moment to say, finally ) If they find me, I promise you a fight—a devil of a fight! ( He disappears. Raina takes off the cloak and throws it across the foot of the bed. Then with a sleepy, disturbed air, she opens the door. Louka enters excitedly. )

LOUKA.

A man has been seen climbing up the water-pipe to your balcony—a Servian. The soldiers want to search for him; and they are so wild and drunk and furious. My lady says you are to dress at once.

RAINA.

( as if annoyed at being disturbed ). They shall not search here. Why have they been let in?

CATHERINE.

( coming in hastily ). Raina, darling, are you safe? Have you seen anyone or heard anything?

RAINA.

I heard the shooting. Surely the soldiers will not dare come in here?

CATHERINE.

I have found a Russian officer, thank Heaven: he knows Sergius. ( Speaking through the door to someone outside. ) Sir, will you come in now! My daughter is ready.

( A young Russian officer, in Bulgarian uniform, enters, sword in hand. )

THE OFFICER.

( with soft, feline politeness and stiff military carriage ). Good evening, gracious lady; I am sorry to intrude, but there is a fugitive hiding on the balcony. Will you and the gracious lady your mother please to withdraw whilst we search?

RAINA.

( petulantly ). Nonsense, sir, you can see that there is no one on the balcony. ( She throws the shutters wide open and stands with her back to the curtain where the man is hidden, pointing to the moonlit balcony. A couple of shots are fired right under the window, and a bullet shatters the glass opposite Raina, who winks and gasps, but stands her ground, whilst Catherine screams, and the officer rushes to the balcony. )

THE OFFICER.

( on the balcony, shouting savagely down to the street ). Cease firing there, you fools: do you hear? Cease firing, damn you. ( He glares down for a moment; then turns to Raina, trying to resume his polite manner. ) Could anyone have got in without your knowledge? Were you asleep?

RAINA.

No, I have not been to bed.

THE OFFICER.

( impatiently, coming back into the room ). Your neighbours have their heads so full of runaway Servians that they see them everywhere. ( Politely. ) Gracious lady, a thousand pardons. Good-night. ( Military bow, which Raina returns coldly. Another to Catherine, who follows him out. Raina closes the shutters. She turns and sees Louka, who has been watching the scene curiously. )

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