StaVl Zosimov Premudroslovsky - Crazy Detective. Anonakidza ekuongorora

– «Uye chinonyanya kufadza,» mushambadzi akaenderera mberi, «… mudzidzisi mumwe kubva kuIrkutsk aifarira Nikolai Vasilyevich Gogol uye akangorega basa rake, kunyanya iro basa re» NOS». Hupenyu hwangu hwese ndakachengeta mari yerwendo rwekuLeningrad (yava kunzi St. Petersburg), pakanga pakaiswa chikwangwani chechiratidzo nemhino refu pane pepa rendarira, yakafanana naGogolevsky. Asi Perestroika akakanganisa hurongwa hwese; akadyara mari yake yese muOJSC MMM uye, semamirioni evachengeti, akasara aine gomba re donut. Mushure mekunge adziya uye atambura nekunetseka kwakawanda kweMyocardial infaration, akatangazve kuchengetedza mari yerwendo rwekuenda kuSt. Uye zvino hope dzakamirira kwenguva refu dzakazadzika mumakore gumi. Akauya kuguta guru iro gamba reSt. Uye, achinge awana muhofisi yekubvunza kuti pane inochemwa uye yagara yakamirirwa kwenguva refu, akamhanya nezvinhu zvekutakura veruzhinji zvine zvitatu, nei nekuendeswa? Kungoti Moskvichka anga akagara mudhesiki rezivo, uye maMoscovites, akasiyana naPitertsev, anofarira kutumira imwe nzira, senge panguva ino. Asvika kwemaawa mashanu mushure menzvimbo yaive yakamirirwa kwenguva refu, akatarisa-tarisa uye, pasina chaakaita, akafunga kubvunza mapurisa aive padhuze aive akatarisa tarisa kune vaifamba vakatamira avo vaizobvarura gogo kubva kwavari.

«Vanodikanwa,» akavadaidza, mumwe wavo akamupindura ndokuti, «ungandiudza here kuti nzvimbo iri kuenda kuGogol’s NOS iripi?»

– Uye pano, – mushandi akacheka musoro wake, – kumwe kunhu pano. – uye akanongedzera kumadziro asina chinhu uye aanarel: kubva padanda pakanga paine maburi pamadziro uye chinyoreso chisina kusimbiswa, saizi yeplate yakabaiwa nemhino yemunhu convex. Granny akafa nekukurumidza nekuda kwekurwara kwemoyo. Pane izvi kutama kwedu kwakaguma. Zvese zvakanaka. To

Ottila akanwa rimwe girazi ndokuenda kunorara. Murima padivi pemubhedha iye akasimbisa uye akakwira kukunda ruoko rwemukadzi wake, uyo aipota achidzingirira. Haana kana kutama. Paakakwira pamusoro pemukadzi wake uye ari pakati pemadziro nemukadzi wake, akarohwa nehana uye nemhepo kubva pamiromo yeiyo hafu inodakadza. Ottila akatora mweya wakadzika uye akasimudza chipfuva chake chepamusoro, chakakura zvishoma kupfuura musoro wake, akarerekera musoro wake kumashure kwemusoro wake kusvika pakurara kwemukadzi wake. Akaisa nzeve yake pane iyo yepasi uye akafukidza nzeve yekumusoro nechipfuva chake chekumusoro. Kuchova kwakanyangarika, uye akagwadama kunge mucheche, mukudziya nekunyaradza.

Mangwanani akamuka akatsikirirwa pabiro. Pakanga pasina mukadzi. Akaenda kunogezeswa uye, atogeza, apfeka nguo yakazara. Akaenda kumusuwo wekupinda kuStrongpoint, akatora chibatiso, uye… Musuwo wakavhurika kubva kwaari mune izvi mamiriro uye akagwinha, panguva iyi akadzvanya gonhi remusuwo, achidhonza Ottila munzvimbo yeiyo Strongpoint, sekunge pasina chinorema chemhepo. Yakabhururuka ichipinda mugomo ndokunanaira. Dumbu rine mazamu akafukidzwa uye akakanda iyo precinct kumashure.

– Chii iwe? Izoldushka!? – Akabvunza achishamisika nhunzi uye shure kweizvozvo akanzwa kurwadziwa kumashure kwemusoro wake, achirova pasi.

– Pukuta tsoka dzako, ini ndakageza ipapo. akagwadama uye akaramba achirovera pasi, achikotama muzasi, kumashure kwake. Mupurisa akafamba akatenderedza mbongoro yake, akapukuta makumbo, akapfeka akatwasuka nenzeve dzarabhi, akapinda muhofisi. Chinhu chekutanga chaakaita, kukwira muchigaro, ndokufamba achienda pafoni patafura ndokumuswededza pamucheto wake. Akanhonga runhare, akagara pamucheto petafura uye ndokuisa panzeve yake. Akabaya runhare mbozha yake uye, achizunza makumbo, akamirira, achiverenga mhete.

– Ullah! – yakanzwika kune rumwe rutivi rwe waya mushure memakumi mashanu emazwi.

– Comrade Marshal? Uku ndiko kudaidza Mr. Dunhu General Klop.

– Ahhhh… ndizvo here iwe? – Comrade Marshall haana kufadzwa, – zvinhu zviri sei munzvimbo itsva? Iwe hauna kudana kwenguva yakareba, wakatanga kukanganwa kuti ndiani e… uh… um, anokudyisa.

– Kwete, uri chii, Eximendius Janis oglu Snegiryov. Ikoko kwaingova pasina chikonzero chekuvhiringidza musoro wako akura pasina.

– Baska, iwe unoti, shanje?

– Uh… kwete, ndine urombo, bvisa musoro.

– Zvakanaka, ngatizviverengei gare gare, nezvetsika dzevakuru uye varidzi. Zvakanaka, chii chauinacho, chimwe chinhu chakakosha?

– Ehe!!!

– Chii chauri kupopota, pygmy hachisi chiRussia?

– Tine hurombo, hongu.

– Zvakanaka, isu taura zvakare pamusoro pemiganhu yeyakajeka inzwi inogamuchirwa yekukurukurirana kwefoni, inotorwa mukutanga kuverenga kweyemutemo musangano weMoscow neRussia.. Uye saka, chii chauinacho, Stinky bug? Uye chiuya nekukurumidza, ndanonoka musangano.

– Wakatarisa chinyorwa chekupedzisira cheKufona Center nezuro husiku?

– Kwete, ndine DiViDishka. Uye chii?

– MuSt. Petersburg, chifananidzo chakabiwa kunaNose.

– Uye chii?

– Ndinoda kuongorora nyaya iyi, kana mukanditendera, O Hon. Mr. Marshall.

– Chii chimwezve mhino, hapana munhu akandiudza, taura zvakajeka. Chikamu chei chakavezwa kuti mhino yavo igurwe?

– Zvakanaka, naGogol..

– Gogol mhino yakagurwa?

– Kwete, Gogol ane nyaya yeFNL.

– Uye chii?

– Mukuremekedza nyaya iyi, chikwangwani chakavambwa muSt. Petersburg uye chakabiwa. Uye ini ndinoziva zvisina kunaka kuti ndiani akazviita.

– Kusina pekugara kana chii? Hapana mumwe munhu. Iye ndarira. Uye chii chaunoda kubva kwandiri?

– Kugadzirisa bhizinesi iri, cartridge.

– Saka batikana, chii chiri kunetsa? Asi chete munguva yako yemahara.

– Asi ini ndichazoda mari yekubhadhara, mari yekufambisa, zvekudya, pekugara muhotera, nemakwikwi ematekisi.

– M-e. Izvo zvaifanirwa kutanga neizvi. Ndokungosvika kuSt. Petersburg, iwe unogona zvakare kutora hare nechitima, iyo Bomzhovskoe inofambidzana, saka hotera haina chekuita nayo. Unogona kuchinja pachiteshi kana, zvakanyanya, pavasina pekugara mukamuri repasi. Uchadya navo. Uye muguta uye netsoka iwe unogona kufamba pamwe nekuona kweSt. Iko hakuna mari mubhajeti kusvikira ndapedza kuvaka kanyumba. Zvakanaka, unondinzwisisa here?

– Uye kubva padhesiki remari yeStrongpoint yangu? Ndakanhonga zvishoma pano pazvirango kubva kuvarimi pamwechete.

– Uye zvakawanda?

– Ehe, izvo zvakakwanira kekutanga.

– Zvakanaka. Tora iyo kubva kuaccount. Kana iwe ukagadzirisa dambudziko, ini ndinodzorera mari yemitengo yekutengesa risiti, asi kwete?! Hazvisi zvangu kuti ndisarudze, nekuti mari iripo pachena.

– Zvakanaka, Eximendius Janis oglu Snegiryov. Ehe, ini ndine nguva shoma, asi ndichauya nechimwe chinhu. – Ottila akaisa foni pasi uye akarara pamusoro petafura, maoko akatambanudzwa.

– Hezvino izvozvi, bhizinesi idzva! Zvino ivo vachaziva nezvangu paPetrovka 38.

Musuwo wakadonha, uye zvimiro zvikuru zveIsolde Fifovna, imwe hafu yake huru, yakaonekwa.

– Uchadya here? – akabvunza zvinyoro-nyoro, uye akasazunza patafura, iniwo ndokuupukuta.

– Ini ndichave nekudya kwemangwanani pano!

– Zvinorevei HERE? Ndakaita sendinomirira here kana chimwe chinhu? Enda kukicheni uye mudye sevanhu vese. Ini handisi kuzotakura.

– Ndingafarire, asi Marshall anofanira kundifonera.

– Marshal? Ndingadaro kudaro. Wobva wamira. Mwanakomana achaunza izvozvi zvasara. Uye ubve patafura, Sherlock Holmes… Hahaha … – akaseka uye akapinda muhafu yechipiri yeimba.

Suo remugwagwa wepamberi rakadonha, uye Corporate Incephalopath akaonekera pasuwo.

– Ndinogona here kutora cartridge?

– Huya ugare pasi… Tine bhizinesi… Mangwana tiri kuenda kuSt. – Ottila akasimuka, akatendeuka ndokugara pachigaro.

– Nei?

– Chikamu chakabiwa kumhino dzeGogol tsvaga.

.– Ini ndinoramba ndichifunga, Bos…

APULAZ 2

Harutun Karapetovich airatidzika kunge akapusa uye akareba. Chiso chaive chakajairika Caucasian. Bvudzi rakachena, kureba kusvika pamapfudzi, kunyange seshanga. PaTiechka pakanga paine mhanza yakasimba yakatorwa kubva pabasa rapfuura sejenitor kune vashanyi vashandi. Pakutanga, akashanda sekati, mushure memakore gumi mutorongo, semusungwa wezvematongerwo enyika. Anecdote akaudza nezvaLenin, mutungamiri wepooleat, uye kunyange nguruve, kune wakaongorora mukanzuru yedhorobha, ikatinhira. Lenin angadai akaita nyore, akangoseka, asi vatungamiriri venzvimbo imomo – aiwa. Asi yaive nguva yekutanga Soviet. Uye saka, nekunyangarika kweSoviet system, nhoroondo yematsotsi yakanyangarika. Akagadziridzwa uye akapiwa magesi zvakanaka. Asi nemudyandigere wake, aida kubatsira munharaunda, uyezve mukadzi wemupurisa wedunhu mutsva akakweretwa nemaziso ake ebhuruu uye… zvakasara ndezve HACK… Saka, ini ndinofunga, handisi kupika… Saka akaenda kukambani kuenda kumukuru wematunhu, uye chinzvimbo chakasara pabasa remauto.