Ian Doescher - William Shakespeare's The Jedi Doth Return

I almost wish my wound were worse to hear
More of thy tender and most soothing words.
But truly, Han, I am not badly hurt.

Be still!

—O my!

—Move not, or else thou diest!

O, I do love thee, Leia dear.

—I know.

Well aim’d, my sweet.

—Hurrah! We now are sav’d.

O, ’tis unjust! Another fighter yet?
This battle fierce we very nearly won,
Yet now this final vehicle appears.
How shall we conquer it and still defeat
The too-importunate Imperi’l threat?
Shall we have no relief from enemies?

[ emerging from the hatch: ] Auugh!

—Chewie! Blessèd sight art thou. I pray,
Come quickly down, for she is wounded.

—Egh!

Nay, wait! [ To Leia: ] A keen idea hath come to me,
Which shall unto this doorway be our key.

Take care, good Wedge: three come at thee above!

Red Three, Red Two, I prithee, pull ye in!

I hear thy word and do attend, good Sir.

Now three approach at twenty, by degrees.

Cut to the left; the leader is for me.
Toward the frigate medical they fly—
O villainy, to make assault upon
Our injur’d. Nay, they shall not strike us thus!

I fly with thee, good Wedge, they’ll not prevail.
But wait, what omen vile’s before mine eyes?
The fighters of the Empire are engag’d,
Yet all the Star Destroyers are at rest.
It is as though some show is here devis’d,
And we’re the actors in a play of war.

We’re set in the position for attack.

’Tis well, now hold thee fast, and wait.

—But Sir,
Dost mean that we shall not make our assault?

This is no plan of my invention, but
The edict cometh from the Emperor
Himself. He hath a special plan afoot.
Our role here is but to prevent escape.
Hast thou mark’d well what I have said?

—Aye, Sir.

[ to Luke: ] As thou canst see, my young apprentice, all
Thy friends have fail’d. Now for the final blow:
Thou shalt bear witness to the strong firepow’r
Of this both fully operational
And armèd battle station. [ Into comlink: ] Fire at will,
Commander! Let the rebels shriek with pain!
Excitement courses through my veins, for I
Do thrill at bringing others misery.

[ aside: ] O pierce my soul, thou cursèd hand of Fate!
Am I the cause for this most bitter scene?
The Death Star active while my comrades die,
And all that I may gaze upon their end.
How shall I keep my mind from thoughts most dark?
How shall I patient be when fac’d with this?
How shall I not respond to anger’s call?
How shall I show a Jedi’s noble soul?
Be with me, trusted Yoda and dear Ben,
Forsooth, I need you more than ever now.

[ to Nien: ] That blast hath emanated from the Death Star. O! ’Tis operational. [ Into comlink: ] Home
One,
This is Gold Leader. Hast thou seen that blast?

We did indeed, and our decision’s made.
All rebel fighters for retreat prepare—
Our fleet is not sufficient to withstand
The might of this new Death Star’s thunderclap.

Thou shalt not have another chance as this
To mount attack upon the Empire, Sir.

We’ve no choice, General Calrissian.
Their vast firepow’r our ships cannot repel—
Betwixt our strength and theirs, too wide’s the gap!

But still I trust that Han will soon disarm
The shield. We must but give him time enough!
His mission is no easier than ours.
A thought hath come to me that we may use—
’Tis dangerous, but may yet worthy prove.
All ships move closer to the Star Destroy’rs,
Engage the giant ships at point-blank range.

At that close range, we’ll not last long against
A Star Destroyer’s harsh and vicious rap.

Yet shall we fare far better than we will
If we engage the Death Star! And belike
Our deaths shall mean their deaths as well. Lay on!

Thy fleet hath lost, and thy dear ones upon
The Endor moon shall not survive. Indeed,
My troops shall make them squeal in agony.
There’s nothing left for which to fight, and no
Escape for thee, my young apprentice. Thine
All’ance shall be destroy’d, as shall thy friends.
The cry of dying rebels—O, how sweet!
How like a song unto my spirit dark.
And now, young one, I feel thine anger rise.
I sense thy hatred, which doth stir my blood.
I sit here, all defenseless, in thy sight.
Take up thy weapon now, and strike me down
In all thy hate, and then your journey t’ward
The dark side of the Force shall be complete.