R Geis - A donkey named Peter

Now listen to Alfred Ellison in his Sex Between Humans and Animals: "An individual whose natural sexual urge has been severely stunted by early parental or religious conditioning, may, following a first accidental contact, turn to the practice of bestiality as a secret outlet for sexual desires and energies which have long been deprived of any other outlet. And in the final analysis, it is perhaps within this latter factor – severe repressive moral training – that one may find the real seeds of not only bestiality, but indeed of all so-called abnormal sex behavior."

In the case of Louisa and Barby it is obvious that tremendous forces, bottled up too long, burst through the most rigid anti-sexual dogma possible. Louisa's deep, puritanical religious attitudes and her personal revulsion to sex with her husband were responsible for her daughter's "sexual psychosis" and for her own helpless fall into that extreme orgiastic and above all masochistic sexual reaction.

My interviews with Louisa follow.

The transcript of those tapes is over a hundred thousand words. It is a shambles to read.

I have edited it, cut it, rearranged it, and written, some transitional material. Where possible I have taken out my questioning – and let her answers and erratic monologue tell the story. Bear in mind that she was always drunk during the tapings.

How it started

"My Barby was a nice clean girl. I brought her up to be a nice girl. But something got into her when she turned sixteen' that awful winter on the farm when we were… we were all alone for almost four months. The snow was terrible."

"No man can know the dreadful pleasures a woman can know. The terrible lusts we are liable to!"

"I spent days of hours in bed with my daughter, swooning in filthy rapture as she did things to me… horribly shameful things… with her hands and with her mouth and with… with things… and in the other room, in my room, with that animal… with that animal!"

"And I did things to her, too, to satisfy her lusts, to repay her… to make life better for her in her sickness. We lied! We lied to each other and to ourselves…"

"The Devil arranged it. I know that now. He took my husband away to work for the winter in another state and brought the blizzards and made her sick… and seduced us."

"She was so healthy. A healthy baby, a healthy child… never ill… never a hint of the perverted lusts that seized her."

"She was sixteen and we couldn't get into town to do anything, we couldn't have a party for her with her friends from around."

"She got that awful cough that terrible wet cough and the doctor said she couldn't go to school at all, probably until spring when it warmed up. She had to stay in bed so much."

"We didn't sleep in the same room at first. I trusted her at first. But I caught her doing things to herself. Dirty things between her legs."

"I heard her one night. It was terribly cold and the snow was almost to the roof on the wind side. I'll never live in snow country again! I'll never live north again!"

"I heard her moaning soft and quiet, muffled – like she was hiding it. I thought she was getting sicker. I thought she was having pain. But I'd never heard her make sounds like that before. I went to the door to her room and stood there in the bitter cold and listened."

"No, the sounds – like she was breathing hard and was trying to keep the moans inside herself. So I wouldn't hear."

"And I heard the bed creaking, too. That regular creaking is what made me think. She had to be moving up and down regular on that bed to make it – sound like that."

"That was a dirty, sex kind of creaking. I know sex sounds in the night – and that moaning, and that breathing fast."

"I know it from my own life, with my own husband when he forced himself on me. Putting his big dirty thing in me. I hated him doing that."

"Yes, but it was different with my Barby. I was doing it for her sake, not mine. Sometimes it made my skin crawl to do the things we did together and with Diablo."

"I didn't know what Diablo meant – it was Spanish and I didn't know any Spanish – Diablo was just a word she thought up to name him. But it means 'devil' and he was; he was possessed by the Devil to do the things he did to us. The Devil took that pony over and seduced us! I know that to be true. It wouldn't have happened but the Devil got into Barby and that animal and he even got into me. With his whispering at night in my bed, with his burning and lusting in my body."

"No, no, I resisted. I resisted till I was biting my cheeks and rubbing snow on my naked body. I even filled myself down there with snow – icy snow, but the burning wouldn't go away."

"He seduced me through her – through my own daughter and through that terrible animal he possessed! I resisted but he beat me down, slimy and cunning; he slipped into me with a desire to help her, to soothe her burning, and he used my own mother love!"

"I think I beat him. I won. I'm winning. He's still in me. Once the Devil gets in you he never leaves. He's always whispering. And once he gets you to do horrible things to yourself that give you that feeling – that feeling – then you're never free. He makes your body want that feeling again and again, more and more, until you are a slave to it. Filthy, sensual, lascivious rolling and grunting in the vise of the body's lusts."

"The first night… yes, when I heard Barby in her bed, doing that to herself I knew what she was doing. I stood listening and I knew. I closed my eyes and I could see through the door, right through the blankets to her body and I could see her fingers going in and out, in and out, in and out, to make the burning more powerful and stronger, until the wave of it comes into you like a moving mountain and takes your breath away and makes you go out of your mind."

"I felt sick. I opened her door and the sound stopped. Like a knife had cut it off clean as a whistle. She stopped. She was holding her breath."

"I went in and got into bed with her. It was too cold to sit out in the air. I had to talk to her. I had to make her understand."

"Barby confessed to me. She pressed herself – her hot young body pressed against me – and she was trembling with what the Devil was doing in her."

"She cried against me… We huddled under the blankets and her hot body… her flesh was so heated by her lust… her hot body burned against me. It was – our nightgowns were nothing – and her lust came over to my body. The Devil crept through to me then… that moment when her breasts were uncovered by her turning and twisting and she pressed them innocently against me."

"Barby – yes, Barby… Barby had large, well-shaped breasts. She was a big, healthy, vital girl at the start of that winter, until the cold and that terrible cough took her. She wasted away, she burned away with the fever and that lust… that dirty lust that… that made her blue eyes bright and glittering. It was the Devil looking out of her eyes."

"But it seemed… I remember, how gaunt she became, but her breasts were still big and sleek and full. And she always had energy for satisfying her lusts. Her woman's parts were always hot to the touch. She was always eager to do things. She was always slippery to the touch between her legs."

"She was possessed, and she possessed me. She made me do horrible things! I didn't resist. I couldn't resist. My faith was weak!"

"She wept in my arms and told me how she had to satisfy herself. The center of her, the core of her body was driving her crazy. She clutched me so tightly and begged me to tell her how to stop her from wanting."

"She whispered what she dreamed. She dreamed of men – of the private parts – of men that attacked her. Big men, big in every place… big with need for her. In her dreams they penetrated her. They were like animals – driving into her, always driving, plunging their… their big stiff things into her."