Tristan Taormino - The Ultimate Guide to Kink - BDSM, Role Play, and the Erotic Edge

Other metal toys specifically designed for bondage are generally much safer. Look for strong welds and a smooth surface. For wrists and ankles, look for wide band-style cuffs. Wrapping the wrists, ankles, and any other tender places with sports wrap before play is another way to ensure comfort in your fantasy cruelty. Look for products from reputable manufacturers. Of course, you can go DIY and use a length of high-quality metal chain with padlocks to create a fierce-looking and very effective restraint.

Bondage lovers are ever inventive, so just about anything can become a potential toy. Any material that turns people on will get turned into restraints. Other materials that can be used for good bondage include wood, spandex, canvas, neoprene, latex, rubber, PVC, ACE bandages, cast plaster, yarn, fur, tape of all sorts, and even specialized medical restraints.

Rope is my first love in bondage play! As a college student, I was inspired by the memories of watching heroes and villains being tied up on the TV shows I watched as a child in Japan. Additionally, the economic realities of being a student put expensive gear hopelessly out of my reach. What began as necessity became a passion, leading me to study rope bondage thoroughly and develop my own unique philosophy and style. The books that I’ve written and the weekend-long Rope Dojo workshops that I teach to this day are a result of that early passion. Nearly three decades later, rope still makes my heart skip a beat.

Rope is endlessly versatile, whether you can barely tie your shoelaces or you’ve memorized the entire Ashley Book of Knots . Don’t let yourself be intimidated by thinking that you have to know fancy knots. If you like complicated, that’s great, but you don’t need to know them.

Selecting the right material is key. Cotton rope is fantastic for beginners. Look for it in magic stores and better sex stores. Avoid the nylon, polypropylene, and most other synthetics, as it’s easy to cause rope burns with them. Hemp, jute, raw silk, and bamboo ropes are lovely, but they’re quite expensive. When you’re starting out, stick to shorter lengths of 12, 15, or 20 feet. Nothing kills a hot scene like the top getting tangled up in his or her own rope.

Here are a couple of simple ties to use on single limbs or a pair of limbs:

What’s a column? Think of the body as a series of columns—the wrists, ankles, thighs, and torso are all columns. A single-column tie is very useful. It works just like leather cuffs or belts as a foundation for binding one part of the body to another, or to furniture.

Equipment

1 piece of rope (10’ or so for wrists; longer for larger body parts). Cotton ropes are great!

Directions

1. Double the rope.

Wrap the doubled rope around the column of your choice.

About three times is sufficient for most wrists and ankles. If you want more coverage, make more wraps.

Make sure that the looped end, also known as the bight, is not too far from the wrap. Six to eight inches is a good length.

2. Cross the loop and the loose ends.

3. Tuck the loop end under the wraps and pull through to the other side.

4. Tie an overhand knot with the loop end and the loose ends.

If the rope is slippery, as many synthetics can be, tie an overhand knot one more time.

5. The loop can be a convenient attachment point for other ropes or hardware such as carabiners or double-snap links.

Tie two body parts together with one rope!

Equipment

1. The two columns should be held a couple of inches or so apart.

Double the rope.

Wrap the doubled rope around the columns of your choice.

About three times is sufficient for most wrists and ankles. If you want more coverage, make more wraps.

2. Cross the loop (the bight) and the loose ends. It’s not a knot, just a twist. These two ends should now be perpendicular to the wrist wraps.

3. Drop the two ends on opposite sides of the wrap.

Wrap both ends a full rotation. They should now be back up on the original side.

4. Tie an overhand knot with the loop end and the loose end.

If the rope is slippery, as many synthetics can be, tie an overhand knot one more time.

5. The loop can be a convenient attachment point for other ropes or hardware such as carabiners or double-snap links.

Equipment

3 pieces of rope (20’ to 25’ each should suffice).

Directions

1. Bend one of the bottom’s legs so that the ankle is tucked to the thigh. Tie a double-column tie between the base of the thigh and the ankle. Repeat with the other leg.

2. Tie the third rope to the loop end of one of the double-column ties.

3. Wrap the third rope around behind the back and run it through the loop on the other double-column tie.

4. Adjust the spread of the legs to taste. Tie off with a simple overhand knot.

Equipment

3 pieces of rope (20’ to 25’ each).

Directions

1. Set up two double-column ties, as in the basic Open-Leg Crab tie.

Tie the third rope to the loop end of the double-column tie on the right leg.

Have the bottom hug his knees. This is important for a fabulous shagging position and comfort later.

2. Lead the free part of the third rope from the right leg over the right shoulder and pass under the left arm.

3. Pass the third rope through the left column-tie loop and pull through fully.

4. Lead the remaining length of the third rope from the left leg over the left shoulder and pass under the right arm. Pass the third rope end through the right loop and tie off with a simple overhand knot.

The third rope should make an “X” pattern on his back.

5. Have the bottom let go of his knees. Gently lean him back.

His legs will be held up and apart by the ropes.

Here’s an interesting body harness, or a karada , based on a Japanese-style rope bondage form called shibari or kinbaku . This harness works well for men or women—just adjust to each person’s contours and features. This is a very simple version. For a more fully detailed version, see the harness in my book The Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage .

Equipment

1 long piece of rope (50’ to 75’, depending on the size of the person)

Directions

Find the midpoint of the rope.

Drape the rope around the bottom’s neck, with the midpoint at the back of the neck and the ends hanging down the chest.