Джеймс Кейн - The Moth

Lina had a hard, trashy face, but in the brother’s outfit, with the blue pants flapping and the white shirt hugging her, she had something. In the water she didn’t squeal and splash like Fats did, but really liked to swim, and could. When I got out there she was in deep water, headed for a float, so I went out there too. Pretty soon we had it to ourselves, letting the swells rock us, with Denny and Fats and their whoopdedo where we could hardly hear them. She watched me, then: “You do a nice crawl, Jack, all except your arms. You’re forcing them out, and it’s all right for a pool, maybe. But on long stretches it sure will wear you down.

“How do you get them out?”

“Roll ’em out.”

She swam for me, and showed me. “Roll out your elbow first and leave it lift your hand out. And relax your hand, so it goes limp. And sling it forward, don’t push it. Sling it easy. Let your middle finger riffle the water as it goes along. And don’t reach. Don’t stretch for distance and grab. And don’t dig your hand in. Roll it in. Roll it in, blade your hand, and let your weight push you ahead. It’s all in rolling your hips to get foot action and your shoulders for arm drive. Do it right you can keep it up all day. Do it wrong you poop out in fifty feet.”

It was play the way I liked to play, quiet, friendly, close.

But there was no getting around it, the air might be hot but the water was cold, and pretty soon we had to come in. So of course Denny and Fats came too. She was all out of breath from laughing and he from making her laugh. In the shack it was so hot you could smell oilcloth, suits, ham, mustard, pop, and girls. Lina opened Cokes and we drank them. I took mine to a table by the window, where there was air coming in. Lina turned on a fan and let it blow her hair around. Denny moved to get some of it, but just shifted from one counter stool to the other. Fats was at the end of the counter, and all of a sudden there was a spitting sound and something popped Denny in the eye and she began chasing a cat. Denny wiped off his face, and went back in the kitchen to look, and Fats kept on talking about how that darned cat kept spitting at people. Lina looked at me and winked. Denny came back and took another swig at his pop. Then here came the spitting sound again and Fats chased the cat again and Denny went out to look again and Lina winked at me again. Then I saw what had happened. Lina had opened two or three spares, and Fats had one, out of sight from Denny under the counter, and she’d shake it up, keep her thumb over it, and then when the pressure was good, she’d ease her thumb and a little pip of foam would spit out and hit Denny in the eye. Then right away she’d kick at the cat, chase it, and hide the bottle. If you ask me Denny was fooled, but maybe he wanted to be. Then he caught her at it, and that was all it needed. In just about ten seconds the whole afternoon we’d been piling up for ourselves exploded.

He grabbed her, shook his own Coke, held his thumb over it, and began popping it in her face as fast as he could get the pressure up. She squealed and pulled away and Lina whooped and held her. Then he tore her suit open and slopped Coke all over her and she did the same for him. Then her suit slipped off and she had nothing on but fat, that shook all over her. Still he kept throwing Coke. Then she got loose and dodged all around. Then she ran in the bedroom and he ran in after her and slammed the door. Lina beckoned me, tiptoed over, opened the door on a crack, and peeped. You could hear them in there, but what made me sick was the look on Lina’s face as she watched them, her mouth wet, her eyes shining, and her breath coming in little short gasps.

“What’s the matter, don’t he like me?”

“Listen, Lina, take it easy. He’s not a horse, see? In the first place you kept him swimming around out there, right on top of all that stuff he put in his stomach, and—”

“What stuff?”

“Sandwiches. Pickles. Ginger ale.”

“What was wrong with that?”

“It was swell. But in the second place, it’s hot—”

“It is, Coolidge, but he’s not. What ails him?”

“Hell, he’s just a kid—”

“Oh, I am, am I?”

When the other two showed, it was our turn in the bedroom, Lina’s and mine, that seemed to be the idea, and Denny’s and Fats’s turn at the keyhole, no doubt. But my imagination didn’t run on that track. Nice made as Lina was, much as I’d liked the swimming, I could no more have gone through with it the way it was being done that afternoon than I could have flown. And the sorer she got the greener I turned, as I could see by the mirror back of the counter, but I couldn’t want her, to save my neck. When Denny made his crack about my being a kid I meant to take a poke at him, but I never got that far. Two steps from my table and I had to dive out the door. There by the car everything came up, ham, bread, pop, and girl. When I got back I knew she’d been told, my real age, I mean, because she stared at me with tears shaking in her eyes, partly from rage at me, partly from pity for herself, that she’d been kidded and didn’t know it. In a minute she picked up my clothes and threw them out. “Get that sick pup out of here!”

Now, as I tell it, it all seems simple enough, and if I couldn’t take it, the wild afternoon the other three had got started on, I guess I don’t mind, looking back at it. I wouldn’t like it, if I had chased her around, torn off her suit, and dragged her in the bedroom, with Denny and Fats at the door. But at that time nothing was simple. Here all summer we’d done nothing but chase girls, not knowing how very well, but hoping. And here at last we’d bumped into exactly what we were looking for: a pair of trollops pretty enough for what we wanted, and trampy enough that they wouldn’t get big ideas in their heads of what they had coming to them afterwards. And they had the time and the place, which were slightly more important than we had any idea of. And then I whiffed out like a wet match. Doing it in front of Denny was bad enough. But that crack of hers, about the sick pup, was the worst of all. Something seemed wrong with me, and not knowing what it was, feeling like some part of a man was left out of me, bothered me, and bothered me plenty. After that I didn’t go out much. Fact of the matter I didn’t go out at all. I found the Old Man’s library, that had been there all the time, and started reading. I read Thackeray and Dickens and Bennett and Wells and Conrad and Hergesheimer and Lewis. There was a lot in their books about what was worrying me, and for a while I wasn’t too proud to get educated second-hand.

The football was an accident, and as you might expect, came from some ideas Denny got. The day after the big afternoon on the bay he was due to leave for Frederick, but didn’t. Baltimore Polytechnic, where I had entered the year before, opened, and you’d think Frederick High School would have opened too, but he didn’t start for it, and every time I’d see him there’d be a lot of mysterious talk about something he was cooking up. Then one Sunday his parents were in town, and they came over to the house. Then I was called in to answer questions about my teachers. Denny’s mother was a tiny little woman, that smiled and listened to what everybody said, but his father was a big, two-fisted customer, that wanted attention whenever he talked, and what he wanted to know about was physics. So it turned out that Denny was so serious about engineering, and the course so limited at Frederick, that it was practically a necessity that he check in at good old Poly, where I was, and where everything of that kind was wonderful. Now this holy consecration that had come over him was news to me. I think I’ve mentioned I’ve a mechanical gift myself, and I was hep, even if they weren’t, that his lech for cam shafts and turbines and belts was about as hot as last night’s potato, and what he didn’t know about them would fill a public library, and what he did would go on one side of a rubber washer, with plenty of room for his autograph. So when it was all fixed up about Poly, I took him out into the garage, and threw on the squeeze. “What is it, smart guy?”