Kwan Kevin - Sex and Vanity

“I had no idea …” Why would he do all that for Mom?

“He’s been even more quiet than usual. I can sense that something’s wrong but I don’t know what. So I thought maybe it had something to do with Freddie. They have become such good friends. They even went skinny-dipping in some pond the other day with Auden Beebe.”

“I wish I could help you, Mrs. Zao, but I’m as much in the dark as you are.”

“Well, if you get the chance to talk to George, can you try to find out for me what’s bothering him?”

“Mrs. Zao, I’d like to help, but you know I’m going to Mongolia next week. I might not be back till Christmas.”

“Not back till Christmas! Is Cecil going with you?” Rosemary asked in surprise.

“Excuse me, but I need to take care of something for my mother before the dinner starts,” Lucie said awkwardly, as she got up from her armchair and rushed off.

She couldn’t find Cornelia anywhere as she wandered through the various rooms, inner courtyards, and the stables, her panic growing with every minute. She knew she needed to get to her before the dinner began. Finally, she found Cornelia in the indoor ring, crouched down on the floor playing with her dogs.

“Hi, Cornelia!” Lucie chirped.

“Oh, hi,” Cornelia answered as she gave Olive, her Westie, a big kiss. “I’m sorry you’ve been banished here, but you’ve all been naughty dogs tonight!”

“I, um, just wanted to … to explain …,” Lucie stammered.

Cornelia looked up with a diplomatic smile. “Lucie, it was none of my business. There’s nothing you need to tell me.”

“Oh. Okay. But I just wanted to say, in case you might have heard some things out of context, it really isn’t what it looks like.”

“It’s fine, Lucie. Shall we go in to dinner?”

“Yes, of course.”

“I’m told the dining tent is down by the ocean.”

“Yes, I’ll show you the way. But I just wanted you to know that I was actually trying to help my mother in there. I’m just trying to protect her from this woman who’s …”

Cornelia put down her terrier, stood up, and looked Lucie straight in the face. “Lucie, I’m really trying to stay out of your business, but it seems like you won’t let it go. Who are we kidding here? You were in the middle of a takedown, a total smear campaign. Now, I don’t live in your building, I don’t know any of these people and this really doesn’t concern me, but please have some self-respect and stop trying to bullshit me. Because the only person you’re deceiving is yourself. And from the looks of it the only thing you’ll succeed in doing is pissing off your mother.”

Cornelia turned and walked out of the room, leaving Lucie red-faced and speechless.

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

Montauk Highway

The Hamptons

“I hate to admit it, but the one good thing you got out of Cecil was this car,” Marian said to Lucie from the driver’s seat of the Aston Martin as she sped along Montauk Highway. They had spent the day in Manhattan, meeting up with the Ortiz sisters at the Colony Club for lunch and running last-minute errands before Lucie’s big trip.

“I’m glad someone’s driving it. I just never thought it would be you,” Lucie remarked distractedly. The full enormity of all her decisions over the past few weeks was finally crashing down on her. Why did I tell George I never wanted to see him again? Why did I break his heart?

“Yeah, I never imagined myself in a car like this either, but it really drives like a dream. And if we were anywhere but the Hamptons, I’d be too embarrassed. But you know, life is short. Why the hell shouldn’t I drive a sports car if I want to? Am I not entitled to my own midlife crisis?”

“You deserve a nice car, Mom,” Lucie said. Why did I fake that co-op letter? Why did I lie to Ms. Ferrer? Why did I lie to Rosemary?

“Are you sure Cecil doesn’t want it back? I’m really getting quite attached to Chad.”

“You’ve named the car Chad ?”

“Don’t you think he looks like a Chad? I had a mad crush on this guy back in high school named Chad. He was on the basketball team.”

Ew. Why is Mom telling me about her high school crushes? Why can’t I get George out of my mind? “I dunno … I’ve always found it weird when people anthropomorphize machines.”

“Weird or not, I hope Cecil’s not taking Chad back.”

“For the eleventh time, Mom, I told you he won’t take Chad … it … back. He said to consider it a breakup gift.”

“Ha! Chad’s a mighty generous breakup gift.”

“The cost of this car to someone like Cecil is like the cost of a bag of Cheetos to you and me.”

“Yes, I gather that’s why the Ortiz sisters had a hard time believing Cecil wouldn’t be dropping in to visit you during the grand expedition, especially when he’s got his own jet. I don’t get why you won’t tell them about your breakup. I’m sure they already suspect. I could see it in Mercedes’s face. She doesn’t say as much as Paloma, but she’s very astute.”

“I’ll tell them after we’ve left New York, Mom,” Lucie said. Why am I going to spend four months traveling through Central Asia with two nice ladies I’ve just lied to? Why the hell can’t I get Cornelia Guest’s words out of my head? “The only person you’re deceiving is yourself.”

“What’s the big secret? You finally dumped Cecil and we should all be celebrating. I always thought you were too young to be getting married anyway.”

“Well, that’s what I realized too. I am too young, and I want to enjoy the rest of my twenties. As you know, I’m going to be twenty-five next year, and that’s when the Churchill trust kicks in. Maybe I’ll use that money and get a place in LA.” The only person you’re deceiving is yourself.

“LA? You want to move to LA? Why would you want to move to a place that’s devoid of culture and has no seasons?”

“It’s not devoid of culture. The food scene’s exploding and so is the art scene.fn1 So many artists I know have moved out there, and they’re all loving it. I can’t wait to try it out.” The only person you’re deceiving is yourself.

“You want to use your trust fund to buy a house in a city that’s full of wildfires and earthquakes? Really smart, Lucie. But I suppose your moving there and having your house burn to the ground is the price we’ll have to pay for getting rid of Cecil.” Marian sighed.

“Mom, tell me, why in all the years that I was dating Cecil did you never express to me how much you hated him?”

“I never hated him, Lucie. He irritated me to no end, but I could see that he was a wounded bird, so I felt sorry for him. That father of his clearly did a number on him while he was around. Besides, what would have been the point of my saying anything? You seemed to like him, and he worshipped the ground you walked on. I didn’t want to come between the both of you.”

“But you’re a Chinese mother. Isn’t it your job to come between us?”

“Ha! I’ve gone out of my way not to be a Chinese mother, you know that!”

“Why is that, Mom?”

“What? Would you prefer me to be some sort of Tiger Mom and drag you down to Chinatown every Saturday for Mandarin classes and force you to take classical Chinese dance? Not allow you to have sleepovers or have a phone or date any white boys until you were thirty? Because that’s how I grew to resent my mother.”

“Wow. Sounds like Freddie and I dodged a bullet.”

“You sure did. You guys hit the jackpot when you got me as your bad mama.”

Driving down Main Street in East Hampton, Marian suddenly made a right turn on Dunemere Lane.