Lian Hearn - Heaven's Net Is Wide

SHIGERU DISCUSSED the subject of marriage with Irie, suggesting the idea of a closer alliance with one of the great families of the West. Following this, further deliberations were entered into by the elders, by Shigeru’s father and his uncles. Meanwhile, his mother moved to the castle, appropriating the best rooms in the deep interior for herself and offending her sisters-in-law, who had to move out to make room for her. In subtle ways her presence changed the balance of power among the Otori lords, and though Shigeru resented her interference in his private affairs-she managed to make it clear that she disapproved of Akane without ever mentioning her and often seemed to find it essential to speak to him at the end of the day when it was his custom to go to the house beneath the pines-he was grateful for her implacable opposition to any appeasement of the Tohan and, above all, any marriage dictated by them. His father, who now spent more time with his wife than at any other period in his life, came gradually under her influence and began to share her views and to rely on her advice rather than on the shamans.

His uncles opposed the idea of the Seishuu alliance on the grounds that it would insult and enrage the Tohan-and in any case, they argued, who was available? Maruyama Naomi was already married; the Arai had no daughters; the Shirakawa had girls, but they were mere infants. So a compromise was reached, and in the end it was agreed, as Shigeru’s mother had first said to him, that the best strategy would be to arrange a betrothal as soon as possible to an Otori girl and pretend that it had been a long-standing commitment.

HER NAME WAS Yanagi Moe: Her family were closely related to the Otori lords and to Shigeru’s mother. They lived in the mountain town of Kushimoto and were a proud, austere family of the old style. Moe was their oldest child and only daughter, and had been brought up to think highly of herself, her family, and her forebears. The Otori marriage was exactly what she had hoped for, believing it to be no more than her right. She had been born the year before Shigeru, and at seventeen, was small and very slight, charming and graceful enough, reserved by nature, overprotected by her family, with little knowledge or interest in the world beyond the walls of her parents’ house. She was fond of reading, wrote passable poetry, and liked playing draughts, though she never mastered chess or Go. She had been well taught how to supervise the running of a household, and she knew how to reduce a maid to tears with a few words. She secretly had no very high opinion of men, having several younger brothers who had replaced her completely in her mother’s affections.

The betrothal took place in Yamagata a little before the winter solstice, and the marriage in Hagi in the spring. There were huge celebrations: gifts of money, rice cakes, and wine were distributed among the townspeople; singing and dancing went on late into the night. Akane listened to the sounds from her house with a bitter heart. She drove her nails into her palms when she thought of him with his bride. Her only consolation was the charm she had received from the old priest. He had laughed when she told him what she wanted and had looked at her with sharp, serious eyes.

“Be careful what you wish for, Akane. It will come true, you know.”

She had let him fondle her breasts in payment, and the charm now lay buried in the garden, together with clippings from Shigeru’s hair and fingernails, and drops of Akane’s menstrual blood.

She did not see Shigeru for a week and had begun to despair, but when he finally came, after dark, alone except for two guards, he took her in his arms at once, without even waiting for the beds to be prepared, and made love with a ferocious desperation that she had never known in him before but which aroused her passion in response. Afterward she held him while he wept-she had never seen him cry-and wondered what had happened to so bruise his sense of self.

It seemed indelicate to pry into the reasons for his distress. She said very little, called for wine to be brought, and poured it for him. He drank several cups in swift succession, and then said abruptly, “She cannot make love.”

“She was a virgin,” Akane replied. “These things can take time. Be patient.”

“She is still a virgin.” He laughed bitterly. “I was not able to get her to open. Everything I did caused her pain and, it seemed, terror. She shrank from me; she had no desire at all for me. I think she has already come to hate me.”

“She is your wife,” Akane said. “She cannot continue to refuse you. You must have children together.” She spoke quietly and calmly, but inwardly she was rejoicing. I’ll let the old man suck my mouth! she vowed.

“I never expected it,” Shigeru said. “I thought I could please her. I thought she would be like you!”

Akane took his hand and rubbed her fingers against the ball of the thumb. She liked the feel of the muscle below the skin, strong and flexible from years of practice with the sword.

“What will I do?” he said. “It is clear that I have not deflowered her.”

“Be patient,” Akane said again. “If you still have no success, it is your mother’s duty to instruct her. Surely she can show her books, reassure her that it is all quite normal. If everything fails, you can repudiate her.”

“And be laughed at from here to Inuyama?”

“Cut yourself and spill blood on the bedding,” Akane said. “It will be enough to silence gossip in the castle. It will give you time. She must come to love you.”

She gazed on him, thinking how any woman in her right mind would do so, inveighing against the fate that had made Yanagi Moe his wife and not Akane herself. If I were married to him, how I would love him, she told herself. I would make him happy.

Maybe the charm had greater powers than she thought; maybe the sight of his vulnerability had weakened her; she found herself suddenly trembling, fearful in an unfamiliar and exquisite way. I am on the brink, she thought. I must not fall. How I will suffer if I do. Yet her defenses seemed so thin and poorly founded, especially against his need.

And his need for her became more apparent. He visited more often and seemed genuinely reluctant to leave. He spoke little about his wife, but she knew matters had not improved between them. Sometimes she felt guilty about what she had done, but then she rejoiced as the strength of their feelings for each other increased.

Yanagi Moe had anticipated her marriage with delight, but by the time the plum rains had ended, it was clear to her that she could expect nothing but suffering from it. Her body had betrayed her by its rigidity and tension: she knew she was a failure as a wife. Shigeru’s mother, Lady Otori, dominated and bullied her; the other women of the deep interior treated her with icy politeness that barely disguised their contempt.

And he, her husband, whom she had imagined she would respect and please, must also despise her. It was open knowledge among everyone that he kept a concubine. That did not shock her-it was common enough among men of his class-but the women of the deep interior often talked about Akane, about her charm and wit, and whispered among themselves that Shigeru was besotted by her.

If Shigeru had been as inexperienced as she was, they might have reassured each other; if he had been older, he might have treated her with more patience and restraint. But he was enmeshed in his first adult affair, which already gave him deep physical and emotional pleasure. Moe’s reluctance and frigidity repelled him; he could not bring himself to demand what was so clearly repugnant to her. He was angered by her in the end, knowing that he must create heirs for the sake of the clan, not wanting to hurt her or insult her family, unable to decide what the solution to such a problem might be, reluctant to discuss it with anyone but Akane. And Akane always said the same thing, “Be patient,” all the while smiling secretively.