Walter Myers - Carmen

CARMEN

And all I said was that the flies like her mouth because her breath smells like-

ZUNIGA

I don’t want to hear this nonsense!

CARMEN

Neither do I! Let’s send out for pizza!

ZUNIGA

You keep your mouth shut. Shea, is this serious?

OFFICER SHEA

The other girl has a cut across her face. And this one had a knife.

ZUNIGA

(to CARMEN)

What did you do? Cut her?

CARMEN

(singing flightily)

Did I? Could I? I’m not talking!

Hands behind her back, CARMEN dances around ZUNIGA.

ZUNIGA

Don’t play with me, Carmen. Now tell me what happened in there.

CARMEN

(still singing)

Burn me! Torture me! I’m not talking! Tra la la, tra la la, tra la la la la la la la la!

ZUNIGA

José, handcuff her and take her in. We’ll show these people we’re not playing!

ZUNIGA and the other men start off. JOSÉ has handcuffed CARMEN, who looks over her shoulder at him.

CARMEN

The handcuffs are too tight!

JOSÉ

They’re not tight at all.

CARMEN

Not for you, of course. You’re a big, strong man, but I’m just a helpless woman. How tall are you, anyway? Seven feet? Look how strong your arms are, and how long. You can put one of your arms completely around my body!

She spins into his arms.

JOSÉ

Behave yourself! You brought this on yourself.

CARMEN

How can you do this to a fellow Italian?

JOSÉ

You’re not Italian, and neither am I.

CARMEN

How can you tell I’m not Italian?

JOSÉ

Your dark eyes tell me that you’re Latina. Your accent is Dominican, and your lips…

(stopping himself)

Well, you’re quite attractive.

CARMEN

Oh, Officer José, tell me what my lips say to you. Whisper it to me. But hold me close so I can hear you.

JOSÉ

Look, you’re going to jail! Don’t talk to me.

CARMEN

Oh, you’ve got me too excited. I need a drink. Something cool. I have a friend who owns a club.

JOSÉ

I told you to keep quiet.

CARMEN

Why are you so hard on me? Don’t you remember me? I’m the little gypsy girl who lifted her dress so you could see her legs, remember? I was in love with you, and you just glanced at me coldly because I was so ugly.

JOSÉ

(weakening)

You weren’t ugly.

CARMEN

And skinny.

JOSÉ

You were thin.

CARMEN

And now? Still too ugly? Still too thin? Wait-let me lift my skirt up…

CARMEN touches the hem of her skirt but doesn’t lift it.

JOSÉ

Carmen!

CARMEN

We can meet at my friend’s club. You’ll love him. It has lots of corners. We can sit and look into each other’s eyes.

JOSÉ

Don’t talk to me like that. I’m a police officer!

CARMEN

Okay, and I’m just a prisoner. And I’m afraid, so I’ll sing to myself. I always sing to myself when I’m afraid. As I am now.

She hums “La Seguidilla.”

JOSÉ

(weakening more)

This isn’t right.

CARMEN

We can make it right!

JOSÉ

You don’t mean what you say! You’re just…

CARMEN

A girl trapped by a huge man who has her in his power. Whose heart is beating wildly as he towers over her! But instead of just feeling fear, she is beginning to have deeper feelings for him. I’m that little girl again in the old neighborhood. Not knowing if I can even go there again. Not knowing if that place even exists anymore.

JOSÉ

(weakening further)

Do you want that place to exist again?

CARMEN

I’m too embarrassed to say what I really want, José.

CARMEN dances in front of JOSÉ, handcuffed hands behind her, pushing them toward him. Finally, he unlocks them. CARMEN turns and takes JOSÉ’s face in her hands as if to kiss him, then pushes him away and runs. She stops at the far end of the stage.

JOSÉ

Don’t make fun of me, Carmen.

CARMEN

No, it’s my heart that’s making fun of me. Leading me into love again when I’m so afraid of it. I’m not laughing at you, José. I would never do that.

JOSÉ

I came here a shell, wondering about my career, and my life. Now you’ve found all the empty spaces and filled them.

CARMEN

If I escape, will you be too angry to ever see me again? Or will you wonder how I would feel if I were in your arms, the way I am wondering how it would be?

JOSÉ

Carmen… Carmen… You make me think too much. I am drunk with thoughts of you.

CARMEN

Lillas Pastia’s club. I’ll be waiting for you.

CARMEN rushes to JOSÉ, kisses him passionately, then runs off. JOSÉ is standing forlornly in the middle of the stage, holding his empty handcuffs. ZUNIGA appears and looks around for CARMEN. He stares at JOSÉ, hands uplifted in question. He sees JOSÉ’s shoulders droop and understands what has happened. Then he crosses the stage and stares directly into the JOSÉ’s face. JOSÉ turns slowly away, cringing. ZUNIGA turns to SHEA and LANE and motions them over.

ZUNIGA

This is what happens to weak men. He’s let that girl get away. Write him up. I’ll do the rest. He doesn’t deserve to be in our unit.

Embarrassed, SHEA and LANE walk away after ZUNIGA.

For a moment the stage is empty except for JOSÉ and some neighborhood types, who are motionless. Then an old man enters from stage right, pushing a cart. Perched on the cart is a portable radio that plays the “Destiny Theme.”

We are at Lillas Pastia’s social club. It is modest, with a roped-off area and a small, slightly raised stage. CARMEN is sitting at a table with MERCEDES and FRASQUITA. Several people are standing at the bar, most sipping small cups of coffee or tea.

FRASQUITA

Carmen, look at you! You’re glowing! Are you sick?

MERCEDES

(feeling CARMEN’s forehead)

She’s got the flu!

CARMEN

I feel fine!

FRASQUITA

You’re depressed. Tell me what’s on your mind. It’s better to get it off your chest.

CARMEN

What’s on my mind? I’m thinking about a certain police officer. Six feet tall… dark eyes…

MERCEDES

(alarmed)

Oh, my God! She’s in love.

FRASQUITA

With a policeman? Not that José? I don’t believe it.

CARMEN

Little scraggly mustache…

MERCEDES

Carmen, please tell me you are not in love with any man. Then tell me two times that you are not even thinking of being in love with a cop!

FRASQUITA

She’s thinking of it. Even though she knows that love doesn’t work these streets. When love has to pass through el barrio, it takes a taxi.

MERCEDES

And keeps its head down so it won’t even see us.

FRASQUITA

Then sneaks away without paying! How do you know you’re in love? It could be swine flu.

CARMEN

I just keep thinking about him, Frasquita. He’s like a tune I can’t get out of my head.

MERCEDES

Carmen, you of all people. You know better. He’ll forget your face and your eyes and your heart. All he’ll see is another poor Latina longing for a life she can’t have. Love is for people with bank accounts. And besides, if he felt that much for you, he’d be around here looking for you. When did you see him last?

CARMEN

They put him on loan to the tunnel authority. All day long he has to breathe car exhaust. It’s only temporary.