John Irving - Until I Find You

“ Venite exultemus Domino! ” Jack’s dad and the workers sang out, together.

Jack knew the Latin only because he’d just been at Old St. Paul’s with his sister. “Come let us praise the Lord!” their father was singing. “I have a son. I have a daughter and a son! Come let us praise the Lord!”

The construction workers went on singing with William.

People were coming out of the church—now that the Boellmann no longer thundered on, now that there was no impending collision. Jack knew that his dad had taken off all his clothes, or he was in a partly undressed phase of the process. Back at the Sanatorium Kilchberg, Nurse Bleibel—either Waltraut or Hugo—would be getting the ice water ready. And then the hot wax, and then more ice water—as Anna-Elisabeth had explained.

Soon William Burns would be standing naked in the Kirche St. Peter, if he wasn’t naked already—his full-body tattoos his only choir. And then, both gently and efficiently, Dr. Horvath would begin to dress him—or both Dr. Horvath and Dr. Krauer-Poppe would dress him. After that, they would be on their way—back to the clinic.

The concert was over, but the construction workers were still applauding. That was when Jack knew that he and his father had always been playing to an audience of more than one—although it had helped Jack, as a child, to believe that he was performing only for his father. (Jack and his dad would have to have a conversation about William’s dispute with The Wurtz over the word audience— that and many other conversations.)

Jack walked away from the square, down those narrow streets. Some of his father’s congregation were in the streets; they walked along with him. It was quite a wonderful feeling to know that Zurich was where Jack belonged, at least until William Burns was sleeping in the needles.

Jack was thinking that he would go back to the Hotel zum Storchen and change into something more suitable for jogging.

It was after midnight in Los Angeles—too late to call Dr. García at home. But Jack didn’t need to have a conversation with his psychiatrist. He would call her office and leave a message on her answering machine. “Thank you for listening to me, Dr. García,” Jack would tell her.

It was four-thirty in the morning in Toronto, or some ungodly hour like that. Caroline would still be sleeping, but she wouldn’t mind a wake-up call from Jack—not if it was about his father, her dear William. In fact, Jack couldn’t wait to tell Miss Wurtz that he had found him.

In Toronto: Helga Stephenson, Bruce Smuck, Dr. Martin Schwartz, Detective Ray Zarb, Debbie Piotrowski.

In Edinburgh: Mary Haggart, Bishop Richard Holloway, Florence Ingleby, Alan Taylor, Kerstie Howell, Aly Barr, Bill Stronach, David Valentine, John Kitchen, Elaine Kelly, Euan Ferguson.

In Halifax and New Glasgow, Nova Scotia: Charles Burchell; Jerry Swallow, a.k.a. Sailor Jerry; Dave Schwarz.

In Copenhagen: Susanne Bent Andersen, Kirstin Ringhof, Merete Borre, Trine Licht, Morten Hesseldahl, Lisbeth Møller-Madsen, Lasse Ewerlöf, Bimbo.

In Stockholm: Charlotte Aquilonius, Doc Forest, Torvald Torén, Unn Palm, Anna Andersson.

In Oslo: Mai Gaardsted, Janneken Øverland, Kåre Nordstoga.

In Helsinki: Olli Arrakoski, Päivi Haarala, Jaakko Tapaninen, Tapio Tittu, Diego, Nipa, Taru.

In Amsterdam: Robbert Ammerlaan; Joep de Groot; Henk Schiffmacher, a.k.a. Hanky Panky; Louise van Teylingen; Willem Vogel.

In Los Angeles: Robert Bookman, Richard Gladstein, Alan Hergott.

In Zurich: Ruth Geiger, Anna von Planta, Professor Waldemar Greil, Dr. Andreas Horváth, Dr. Oliver Hartmann, Dr. Stephanie Krebs, Dr. Alice Walder, Dr. Christine Huwig-Poppe.

Special thanks to: Kelly Harper Berkson, David Calicchio, Kate Medina, Harvey Ginsberg, Craig Nova, Alyssa Barrett, Amy Edelman, Janet Turnbull Irving.

Grateful acknowledgment is made to the following for permission to reprint previously published material:

Carcanet Press Limited : Excerpt from “A Slice of Wedding Cake” from Complete Poems in One Volume by Robert Graves, published by Carcanet Press Limited. Reprinted by permission.

Hope Publishing Company and Stainer & Bell Ltd. : Excerpt from “Lord of the Dance” by Sydney Carter (1915–2004), copyright © 1963 by Stainer & Bell Ltd. Rights in the United States and Canada administered by Hope Publishing Company, Carol Stream, IL 60188. Rights throughout the rest of the world administered by Stainer & Bell Ltd., 23 Gruneisen Road, London, N3 1DZ, England. Reprinted by permission of Hope Publishing Company and Stainer & Bell Ltd.

Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC : Excerpt from “When I’m 64” by John Lennon and Paul McCartney, copyright © 1967 (renewed) by Sony/ATV Tunes LLC. All rights administered by Sony/ATV Music Publishing, 8 Music Square West, Nashville, TN, 37203. All rights reserved. Used by permission.

Special Rider Music: Excerpt from “Don’t Think Twice, It’s All Right” by Bob Dylan, copyright © 1963 by Warner Bros. Inc. and copyright renewed 1991 by Special Rider Music; excerpt from “Mama, You Been on My Mind” by Bob Dylan, copyright © 1964 by Warner Bros. Inc. and copyright renewed 1992 by Special Rider Music; excerpt from “Mr. Tambourine Man” by Bob Dylan, copyright © 1964 by Warner Bros. Inc. and copyright renewed 1992 by Special Rider Music; excerpt from “Just Like a Woman” by Bob Dylan, copyright © 1966 by Dwarf Music; excerpt from “It’s All Over Now Baby Blue” by Bob Dylan, copyright © 1964 by Warner Bros. Inc. and copyright renewed 1992 by Special Rider Music; excerpt from “Idiot Wind” by Bob Dylan, copyright © 1974 by Ram’s Horn Music; excerpt from “I Want You” by Bob Dylan, copyright © 1966 by Dwarf Music. All rights reserved. International copyright secured. Reprinted by permission.

The Society of Authors : Excerpt from “Oh When I Was in Love with You” by A. E. Housman. Reprinted by permission of The Society of Authors as the Literary Representative of the Estate of A. E. Housman.

JOHN IRVING published his first novel at the age of twenty-six. He has received awards from the Rockefeller Foundation, the National Endowment for the Arts, and the Guggenheim Foundation; he has won an O. Henry Award, a National Book Award, and an Oscar.

In 1992, Mr. Irving was inducted into the National Wrestling Hall of Fame in Stillwater, Oklahoma. In 2001, he was elected to the American Academy of Arts and Letters.

The Fourth Hand

My Movie Business

A Widow for One Year

Trying to Save Piggy Sneed

A Son of the Circus

A Prayer for Owen Meany

The Cider House Rules

The Hotel New Hampshire

The World According to Garp

The 158-Pound Marriage

The Water-Method Man

Setting Free the Bears

The Cider House Rules

Any dialogue or behavior ascribed to the characters in this book—those who are real people as well as the characters who are imagined—is entirely fictitious. This is a novel.

Copyright © 2005 by Garp Enterprises, Ltd.

All rights reserved.

Published in the United States by Random House, an imprint of The Random House Publishing Group, a division of Random House, Inc., New York.

RANDOM HOUSE and colophon are registered trademarks of Random House, Inc.