Ha Jin - Ocean of Words

“I’ll make him drink horse pee!”

“I’ll increase his meal expenses,” Meng said. We all laughed.

“Hey, stop laughing, men,” Ma Lin shouted at us. He was in the group on our left. “We’re all going to the hill ahead and beat the woods.”

We set out for the foot of the hillock. Lev’s escape puzzled us. Did he plan to meet someone, an agent, at a certain place? Did he know in what direction Russia was? He must have known, otherwise what was the good of escaping? Did he have weapons and food with him? Why did he run away just a week before the National Day? Was he joining someone in order to destroy a factory or blow up a bridge on October 1? None of these questions could be answered. But one thing we were all certain about — if he knew his whereabouts, he would be able to return to Russia, because it was midfall now and the crops could cover him. Though more than thirty thousand troops and militia were in the operations, there was no way that we could go through every place in this vast area of eleven counties and three cities. Besides, he was a live creature and could move about to avoid us. More to his advantage was that he would not starve in the season of harvest, since there were fresh beans, corn, potatoes, and vegetables in the fields everywhere and even ripe fruits in the mountains. As long as he knew his bearings, he could get back to Russia. It seemed somebody among us must have accepted his bribery and told him that he was in Longmen. If Lev succeeded in hiding out or crossing the border, then everyone in our squad would be suspected. We had to bring him back to clear ourselves.

It was one o’clock now. We had been searching for almost five hours without rest. Whoever we came across, soldiers or militia, would curse “The Russian Big Nose,” “The Polar Bear,” “The Russian Hairy Beast.” They didn’t know Lev’s name, or what he looked like. We dared not tell them, because he had broken loose from our hands. Also, Lev was really an egg of a turtle, deserving any name. We had treated him so well, but he betrayed us and made us crawl around on a dark night like this, hungry and exhausted.

We hadn’t brought overcoats and food, nor could we go back and fetch them. The orders stated clearly: “Do not return until you find him.” After five hours’ walk, we were tired out and dying to eat something. There were edibles in the fields, but none of us dared touch them. The Second Rule for the Army says never take anything that belongs to the people, so we tried hard to stand the hunger and went on searching.

But we couldn’t keep this up. It was cold. Dewdrops fell on us from the tops of the crops, and our clothes were soaked through. Without food in our stomachs, we felt as if our bones were hollow inside and couldn’t help trembling.

We entered a turnip field where sorghum also grew. Between every dozen rows of turnips, there were four or five rows of sorghum. Every group was walking in its own turnip strip and couldn’t see the other groups in the adjacent strips. Wang Min said, “Can’t we have a tur-turnip?” His teeth were chattering.

“It’s gnawing inside,” I said, kneading my stomach.

“Why not?” Meng Dong kicked down a turnip. He tore off the leaves and began gobbling.

We all got our turnips. Wang Min stabbed the head of his turnip with his bayonet to get rid of the leaves. “Don’t use the bayonet. It’s poisonous,” Meng warned him.

Wang was a new soldier and forgot that. He threw away the turnip and pulled up another one, as big as a baby. Soon we all stopped talking and ate quietly. We were afraid that the groups on both sides might know what we were doing, so we tried to make as few noises as possible. Who knew what they were doing? They might have been eating turnips too. People all at once fell into silence, and we only heard muffled footsteps advancing.

I finished the turnip and yanked up another. Meng got his second one too. Wang’s was too big to finish. Thank God, the field was long, and I could eat up the second turnip before we got out of it.

Now it was two-thirty, and we were told to pull up and get two hours’ sleep. Our company leaders must have thought that the search would last for days, so they didn’t want to wear us out too soon. We all sat down on a flattish slope that separated a soybean field and an oak wood, but this time everybody stayed by himself and kept a distance of thirty meters from the next man.

Soon it became quiet, and only a few barking dogs could be heard vaguely. Stars hung loosely in the dark purple sky. Some streaks of clouds fluttered beneath the majestic silver moon, which laid its steely beams on the damp plants and the furrowed land. The stuff in my stomach started stirring and made me want something warm and hot, soup or porridge, which could relieve the uneasiness inside. Turnips were a good vegetable for opening bowels, and one turnip was more than enough for that purpose, but I had rammed two into my stomach. Now heartburn replaced hunger.

If only we had a fire and could roast some fresh soybeans … it’s so cold … oh my knees … they are numb … not my own …

Peanuts, fresh peanuts, so delicious, just roasted … together with the vines … come sit here, close to the fire … what a good flat stone, warms up your feet so well … give me some room … I want to heat up my lunch — salted mackerel and corn cake … smells so good … the sun, what a spendid sun, dry and warm … those clouds … wonderful — horses and cows … also apples and pears … hah, we have everything here … Fourth Dog, where’s your brother … call him to stop digging for potatoes … don’t be greedy … the whole field is ours … nobody knows this place … Lilian, take a bite of this melon … it will melt your teeth … why laughing … it’s sweeter than anything from Dwarf Liu’s garden … hey, all of you … come here … peanuts, fresh peanuts roasted with vines … don’t you want to have some … sit here around the fire and eat … everybody is welcome … today’s Communism Day — take whatever you need … why are you giggling, Old Meng … don’t you feel happy … you son of a goat … don’t you want to have fun … where’s Lev … he was eating peanuts here just now … you mean he’s taking a piss in the bushes … hey, who’s there … is that you, Lev … no, it’s Wang Min … Wang — Min — … tell Lev we have baked sweet potatoes too … more good eats for him to wipe out … Ma Lin, give me your fur coat … don’t be selfish … it’s my turn to be warmed … who is blowing a whistle there … damn, who’s the killjoy —

“Guards Company get up” … who is yelling — “Guards Company get up.”

I jumped to my feet and picked up my rifle. Kneading my arms, I felt numbing pains in the elbows. My knees went shaky too, and I slapped my legs to wake them up. What a dream! I had dreamed of so many good things, but everything was messed up. How could so many people get to one place — my home village? Terrible, I even dreamed that Lev was our friend. All gathered in Fox Valley.

Oh how I miss home! Home, the place that is always warm and safe, where you can sleep a whole day and a whole night when you’re so dog tired. Mom will bring a bowl of millet porridge, hot and delicious, to the side of your pillow when you open your eyes in the morning, and there will be four poached eggs in the porridge. Oh Mom and Dad, how I miss you! —

My thoughts were interrupted by some people’s swearing. They cursed Lev again, wishing him to be crushed to death and licked to a skeleton by bears.

It was almost dawn. A thin curtain of fog surrounded the oak woods and spread above the fields. Every blade of grass was heavy with dew. The air smelled grassy, but everybody seemed to lack the strength to breathe in the fresh air. We spread out along the slope quietly, forming a long line at the edge of the woods. I felt dizzy, and my forehead was still numb. A woodpecker was hammering at a tree trunk, and the sound seemed to shake the entire mountain as we started moving.