David Peace - Red or Dead

And Bill went off to work.

Bill drove down the West Derby Road. And Bill saw people going into the newsagents. Buying their morning paper. Bill turned onto Belmont Road. And Bill saw people queuing at the bus stops. On their way to work. Bill turned into the car park at Anfield Road. And Bill saw the dustbin men and the postmen. Working. And Bill smiled. Bill got out of the car. Bill walked across the car park. Bill went into the ground. And into work.

Bill went down the corridor. Bill went up the stairs. Bill went into his office. Bill took off his hat. Bill hung up his hat. Bill walked around the bags of mail. The mountain of bags and bags of mail. Bill sat down behind his desk. Bill looked around his office. The filing cabinets and the shelves. The shelves of books. The books of names and the books of notes. The bags of mail. The mountain of bags and bags of mail. And Bill smiled. Bill reached into the first bag of mail on top of the mountain of bags and bags of mail. Bill took out a letter. Bill opened the letter. Bill read the letter. The letter of congratulations on winning the Cup. The letter of thanks for winning the Cup. And Bill smiled again. Bill put down the letter. Bill opened the top drawer of his desk. Bill took out a piece of paper. Bill closed the top drawer of his desk. Bill threaded the piece of paper into his typewriter. Bill turned the platen knob. And Bill began to type –

Bill began to work.

There were footsteps in the corridor now. There was a knock upon the door now. And Bill stopped typing. Bill looked up. And Bill saw Bob. Bob was standing in the doorway. Bill smiled at Bob. And Bill said, Morning, Bob. How are you today, Bob? You look a wee bit pale, Bob. Like you’ve seen a ghost, Bob. Are you all right, Bob?

Well, said Bob. I suppose I’m still in a state of shock.

Why, Bob? What’s happened? What’s wrong, Bob?

You, said Bob. Resigning. I had no idea. No idea at all.

Oh, that. Yes, well. I’ve made a decision, Bob. I’ve talked it over with Ness. And we both feel I need a rest. I mean, I’m still fit enough. I’m not ill. Don’t worry. I’m fit, but I’m tired. And so I need a rest. I need to recharge my batteries. That’s all, Bob.

But surely then there’s no need for you to resign, said Bob. To call it a day. Have you not considered just having a bit of a break? Perhaps a cruise with Ness? Get your feet up for a bit. See the world. I could look after the shop for you. Keep things ticking over. You wouldn’t have to worry. I’d keep things just the way they are. And then you could come back. Your batteries recharged, as you say. And things could go on. Just as they were. Just as they are.

No, Bob. No. I’ve made my decision. And I’m sticking to it. If you can’t make decisions in this game. If you can’t make decisions in life. Then you’re a bloody menace, Bob. A bloody menace. You’re better to go and be an MP or something.

Please, said Bob. Don’t make me beg you, Bill. Please. Don’t make me go down on my knees, Bill. But if that’s what it’ll take to make you change your mind. Then that’s what I’ll do, Bill.

No, Bob. No. I’ve said I’m retiring. And so that’s what I’m going to do. I mean, I don’t agree with the word. I hate the word! It’s the stupidest word I’ve ever heard in all my life. It should be stricken from the record, retirement. Nobody can retire! You retire when you get the coffin. And they nail down the lid. And your name is on the top. That’s retirement! No, Bob. No. But I’ve said I’m retiring from Liverpool Football Club. From Anfield. And so that is what I’m going to do. But not from football, Bob. Not from life. No.

But what about today, asked Bob. The training? The preseason? What are we going to do, Bill?

Bill laughed. And Bill said, Same as we always do, Bob. I’m still here. Nothing’s changed, Bob. I’ll be down in a minute.

Bob stared at Bill. At his desk, at his typewriter. And Bob shook his head. And Bob smiled –

Well, if you say so, Bill. Then I’ll see you downstairs. In a minute then, Bill. Downstairs …

Bill nodded. And Bill looked back down at his desk. At his typewriter, the unfinished letter. And Bill began to type again. To finish the letter, to finish his work. And then Bill looked at his watch. Bill got up from his desk. Bill picked up his bag from the floor. His kit bag. Bill walked around the bags of mail. The mountain of bags and bags of mail. And Bill went out of his office. Bill went down the corridor. Bill went down the stairs. Bill went into the changing rooms. Bill put down his bag on the bench. His kit bag. Bill took off his tie. His red tie. His Liverpool Football Club tie. And Bill took off his shoes. His suit. And his shirt. Bill put on his tracksuit bottoms. His sweater. And his boots. Bill went out of the dressing room. Bill went down the corridor. Bill went out of the ground. Into the sunlight. And Bill stood in the car park at Anfield, Liverpool. Ready for training,

ready for work.

Up at Melwood, in the pavilion. Before their training, before their work. Bill gathered together the players of Liverpool Football Club. But Bill did not look around the room. Bill did not look from player to player. From Liverpool player to Liverpool player. Bill stared into the distance. A slight shadow on the far wall. And Bill said, As you probably know, boys. As you’ve probably all heard. I had a big meeting up at Anfield on Friday. Because I have decided to retire. My time here is done, boys. And so a new man will come in. I don’t know who. And I don’t know when. But when he does, I will be gone. But I know you’ll all try as hard for him and work as hard for him as you have for me, boys. Because I could not have asked for more. And so I thank you now, boys. For all your hard work. I thank you, boys. And I wish you all the very best of luck. And every future success, boys –

For all of you and for the club …

But you can’t retire, cried Emlyn Hughes. Please, Boss. You just can’t. Please don’t, Boss …

Give it a rest, muttered someone. Pack it in, Thrush …

Bill breathed in, Bill breathed out. And Bill said, I’ve simply done enough and had enough, boys. I’ve been in this job a long time. And now I want to spend more time with my family. My grandchildren. And so I have to think about my health and my wife. But that’s enough about me, boys. That’s enough talking for one day. We’ve got a league to win, boys. A title to win –

So come on, boys. Come on –

Let’s get it going …

And Bill led the players out of the pavilion. And round the training pitch. Bill joking, Bill laughing. Cajoling and inspiring. But running, still running, running harder, harder than ever. Then the players split into their groups. And the players lifted weights. The players skipped. The players jumped. The players did squats. The players did abdominal exercises. And the players sprinted. And Bill lifted weights. Bill skipped. Bill jumped. Bill did squats. Bill did abdominal exercises. And Bill sprinted. Bill laughing, Bill joking. Inspiring and cajoling. But sprinting, still sprinting, sprinting harder, harder than ever. And then the players passed the ball. The players dribbled with the ball. The players headed the ball. The players chipped the ball. The players controlled the ball. And the players tackled. And Bill passed the ball. Bill dribbled with the ball. Bill headed the ball. Bill chipped the ball. Bill controlled the ball. And Bill tackled. Bill joking, Bill laughing. Cajoling and inspiring. But tackling, still tackling, tackling harder, harder than ever. And the players went between the training boards. The players moving, the ball moving. Playing the ball against one board. Then taking the ball, controlling the ball. Turning with the ball, dribbling with the ball. Up to the other board. In just ten touches. Playing the ball against the other board. Then pulling the ball down, turning again and dribbling again. Back down to the first board. In just ten touches. And Bill went between the training boards. Bill moving, the ball moving. Bill playing the ball against one board. Then taking the ball, controlling the ball. Bill turning with the ball, dribbling with the ball. Up to the other board. In just ten touches. Bill playing the ball against the other board. Then pulling the ball down, turning again and dribbling again. Back down to the first board. In just ten touches. Bill laughing, Bill joking. Inspiring and cajoling. But dribbling, still dribbling, dribbling harder, harder than ever. Then the players went inside the sweat box. Ball after ball. Into the box. Every second, another ball. For one minute. Then for two minutes. Then for three minutes. Ball after ball, into the box. And Bill went into the sweat box. Ball after ball. Into the box. Every second, another ball. For one minute. Then for two minutes. Then for three minutes. Bill joking, Bill laughing. Cajoling and inspiring. But sweating, still sweating, sweating harder, harder than ever. And then the players played three-a-sides. Three-a-sides then five-a-sides. Five-a-sides then seven-a-sides. Seven-a-sides then eleven-a-sides. And Bill played three-a-sides. Three-a-sides then five-a-sides. Five-a-sides then seven-a-sides. Seven-a-sides then eleven-a-sides. Bill laughing, Bill joking. Inspiring and cajoling. But playing, still playing, playing harder, harder than ever. And then, finally, the players ran one last time around the training pitch. And Bill ran one last time around the training pitch. Bill joking, Bill laughing. Cajoling and inspiring. But running, still running, running harder, harder than ever. Until the final whistle, until the job was done. The work complete. His work.