Lottie Phillips - The Little Cottage in the Country

She squeezed her eyes shut and immediately regretted it. It was one thing being single with two children and getting drunk with a mate. But being single and getting drunk ALONE; that filled her with self-loathing. It hit her then: Diane should come and live with them, if for no other reason than it would be nice to have someone to help her with the twins, help them get settled.

Anna dragged herself off her bed and tiptoed halfway down the stairs to check on the twins. She could hear their gentle snoring and watched Freddie’s face looking suddenly so cherub-like. It was moments like this that made her more determined than ever to make life better for her children.

Yes, she thought, nodding to herself, filled with a renewed sense of purpose. Their new life was going to start tomorrow.

*

Diane arrived bright and early. Too early.

Anna had just about managed to get the children bathed, after which they had eaten the rest of the beef stew (Anna made a mental note that she might actually have to visit a supermarket today). They were now playing happily outside and she walked to the front door and watched them. The scene was something out of a fairy tale. Until she looked closer. Freddie had his sister’s hand and was whizzing her round and round to the tune of ‘Mummy is sick, Mummy is green, Mummy looks like a seasick bean’.

A car older and crankier than her own was chugging its way up the hill and she recognised it in a heartbeat. Diane parked her Citroen Saxo next to the Nissan and clambered out of the car, throwing her arms wide.

‘My darlings,’ she announced, ‘I am here.’

Freddie whooped at the sight of his favourite surrogate auntie and released his sister’s hand mid-spin, causing Antonia to break away and spiral like a spinning top to the ground. Her lower lip started to quiver but, on seeing Diane, she got up directly and ran over with Freddie.

Diane walked up the path, her eyes darting over the cottage, and took Anna in a firm embrace. Freddie and Antonia put their arms around Diane and they stood like that until Diane pulled away and broke the spell.

‘You look awful,’ Diane commented jovially.

‘Thanks,’ Anna said.

‘Mummy is sick, Mummy is green, Mummy looks like a seasick bean,’ Freddie started up again.

‘OK, you two,’ Anna said, wishing they would quiet down an iota: her head was about ready to explode. ‘We’re heading off to Waitrose soon, OK, so don’t get too mucky. Dee-Dee and I are going to have a quick cup of coffee.’

Diane gave herself a whistle-stop tour of the house and, when she returned to the kitchen, smiled. ‘Not quite The Good Life .’

‘I did try and tell you on the phone last night.’

‘Yeah, but it’s got a charm about it.’ She laughed. ‘The outside looks a bit like the end of the world has come.’ She paused. ‘But I like it.’

‘So, you want to stay?’ Anna poured the coffee out.

‘Oh, yes.’ She barked a laugh out. ‘Don’t worry, I’ve still got my flat in London in case I piss you off or cramp your sex life.’

Anna giggled. ‘Please. Don’t make me laugh.’ She clutched her stomach. ‘Drank a bottle of Merlot to myself.’

‘You’ve got a hangover on that? Lightweight.’ Diane wafted her hand dismissively. ‘That’s what I’m here for. To help you with this place and to have fun and… Girlfriend?’ She adopted her slightly strange Bronx meets Welsh accent. ‘Girlfriend, we are gonna have ourselves some fun.’

‘And look after the children.’

‘Yeah, course.’ Diane slurped at her coffee. ‘I mean, I decided to forego my feminism while I’m here.’

‘Can you do that?’ Anna hid behind her mug, stifling a smile.

‘What?’

‘Just stop being a feminist and then pick it up again? Not sure it’s exactly in line with The Female Eunuch and all that.’

‘No, I suppose not.’ Diane appraised her friend. ‘But who could resist a good shag?’

Anna clinked her mug against Diane’s. ‘Hear, hear!’

A knock at the door startled them both. Anna went to see who it was.

‘Hi.’ A man with sandy-coloured hair and the brightest blue eyes Anna had ever seen stood on the doorstep, smiling broadly at her. ‘I wanted to say hello.’ He handed her half a dozen eggs and a zip-locked bag of bacon. ‘And welcome.’

‘Wow, thanks.’ She took them from him and wondered if it was possible to never go to a supermarket again and live off the land for ever more. OK, not the land, but everyone else in the village. ‘That’s really kind.’

‘I’m Richard.’

Anna held out her free hand. ‘Anna.’

His grasp was warm and strong, his hands slightly calloused, and then, as if reading her thoughts, he announced, ‘I own the farm you drove past on your way in. Briars Farm?’

Anna nodded. ‘Yes, I think I saw it.’

Anna flushed under his intense stare and turned her attention to the children, who had come to spy on the stranger. ‘Say hello to Richard. Look, he’s brought us breakfast. Isn’t that kind of him?’

Richard turned to the twins, who nodded shyly. ‘Do you guys want to come and see around the farm some time?’

‘Yeah!’ Freddie loved farms. ‘Can I drive a tractor?’

‘I don’t see why not.’ Richard looked at Anna. ‘Come?’ She nodded. ‘Soon?’ He turned on his heels and walked off. ‘Enjoy your breakfast!’

Anna started to walk back towards the kitchen but spied Diane peeping out of the front window.

Diane grinned. ‘Ding-dong! Now that’s what I’m talking about.’

Anna smiled. ‘He was quite good-looking, wasn’t he?’

Diane rushed up to her and held her hand to Anna’s forehead. ‘ Quite good-looking? Quite good-looking? The man’s the finest specimen I have seen for a long time.’ She nodded. ‘A really long time.’ She looked at Anna. ‘Do you think “breakfast” is a euphemism in these parts? Like, I’ll give you eggs and bacon, if you butter my bread.’ She puckered her lips. ‘Delicious.’

‘You are incorrigible,’ Anna said, picking up a cushion off the sofa and throwing it at her.

With Diane’s bags offloaded into the sitting room and breakfast eaten, they headed out in search of a supermarket.

‘I’ll buy the food, darling. It’s the least I can do,’ said Diane.

‘No, no, you’re on leave,’ Anna said matter-of-factly. ‘In fact, how did you manage to wangle time away from work at the magazines? And didn’t Tracey want you to do the make-up on the set of that new Brit film?’

Diane worked as a freelance photographer and make-up artist – often combining the two – and she was good, very good. They’d first met through Barry, who clearly had some sort of crush on her.

‘Anna, I’d like to introduce you to the next Annie Leibovitz.’ He grinned broadly. ‘She just did a shoot with the one and only…’

Anna had watched them both steadily, waiting.

‘Alice Cooper!’ Diane had eventually announced proudly. ‘And I did his make-up.’

‘But he’s a man,’ Anna commented drily.

‘Yeah, so?’ Her grin faded and she arched an overplucked brow. ‘You want me to do your make-up?’

Barry rested his pudgy hand on Diane’s shoulder. ‘That’s my girl.’

Barry had given them their next job and, as they discussed how best to work London Fashion Week, Diane set about working her magic on Anna’s face. She hadn’t the heart to tell Diane she wasn’t sure the orange lipstick and glitter lashes really suited her, but she had found a soulmate. They went out and danced all night, drank cheap shots, and Anna quickly forgot she looked like a clown as they downed another round of Flaming Sambucas.

Anna glanced at her friend and thought she saw a look of worry cross her pretty features; but then, as quickly as it had arrived, it disappeared and Diane smiled at her. It was good to have her here, Anna thought. Diane looked in the small cosmetic mirror and reapplied her bright-pink lipstick with a steady hand as Anna drove. Smacking her lips, Diane turned in her seat and handed Antonia her lipstick. ‘You want some?’