Lisa Clark - Livin’ la Vida Lola

New York City.

I know.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m pleased for her.

(No, really I am. Grr.)

Aunt Tallullah, my lovely Lullah, has an ah-mazing new job that involves her getting all schmoozy woozy with actor-types on a daily basis.

I know.

My aunt is an on-set designer-girl for TV and movies.

I mean, seriously, what’s not to love about that?

And I’m not talking just C-list wannabee actor-types, nope, I’m talking the headline grabbing, pap-toting, turn-up-late-to-work-just-because-I-can A-lister variety.

I know.

But the thing is, with her being all the way over there in Schmooze Ccity, well, it means she’s not here. And here, without lovely Lullah, is like having the hugest, most dee-licious, slice of gooey chocolate cake without lashings and lashings of whipped cream.

Pointless.

Things I love Some facts about lovely Lullah:

She’s totally fabulous.

She’s my idol-girl.

She sometimes looks like she’s walked out of 1940s Paris–ooh la la.

She sometimes works monochrome like a 1960s mod girl.

She’s a superhero-girl. Think younger, red-headed sister of Wonder Woman. Although, unlike aforementioned superhero, Lullah would never discard her handbag when changing costume. Evah.

She’s a palm reader.

She smells like candyfloss and jasmine incense.

She gave me a journal to track all my hopes and dreams.

She sprinkles her vocab with crazy made-up words from her favourite films. She’ll say things like, ‘sweetie, that’s simply de-lovely’ or ‘Lola, this chocolate cake s’wonderful, s’marvellous.’

She’s a bright ray of sunshine on a dark, cloudy day.

‘Til recently, Lullah was studying all things fashion and film, her two favourite things, at a fancy-schmancy university in the city of Londinium. To save pennies, she shunned the bright lights of the big city and stayed here with us, in dreary old Dullsville-by-Sea, commuting into the Londinium when she had to do the study stuff.

And she did a lot of the study stuff–that’s why she’s got the schmoozy woozy job of fabulousness–but she was never, ever too busy to hang out with li’l ol’ me.

I loved it best when I’d arrive home from school and instead of finding an empty house I’d find a lovely Lullah sat on the kitchen table–literally, either sewing buttons to a £2 chazza shop bargain or sketching a foofy hoop skirt and flowery décolletage in her notebook.

Lullah just gets it.

She doesn’t care what people think of her, not one little bit and dispenses guru-like advice in every sentence. Like, when we go chazza shoppin’ she’ll say ‘vintage clothes are better than new ones because they have history.’

But what I loved best was that, unlike my mum, she was a superhero-girl. And as a superhero-girl with superhero-girl powers, she was able to sense a major-league sucky event in Lola world at 100 kitten-heeled paces.

At the first sign of trouble, she would throw me the double wink and I knew what I had to do.

In a one swift movement that even ol’ slinky-milinky Catwoman couldn’t have found fault with, I would crack open a tub of chocolate chip cookie dough ice-cream, grab two spoons and put Breakfast at Tiffany’s in the DVD player. And together, we would make a Lola and Lullah-shaped dent in the old battered sofa. Mission accomplished.

“When real-life lacks the technicolour fabulousness of the big screen, Lola Love,” Lullah would say in her best Hollywood-esque vocab, “there really is nothing better to soothe the soul than an idol-girl in industrial strength foundation.”

Tres poetic.

With a flick of the ‘play’ switch and a quick cuddle, I felt safe. Safe in the knowledge, that for the next hour and a half, I could imagine what my life might have been like if I had lived in another time and place–what can I say? I’m an old fashioned girl.

But just like every good movie before it, Breakfast at Tiffany’s has to end. It always does. And in one of those sucky ‘life imitating art’ moments, at the end of our last movie session, so did my life, as I knew it.

I’m super-chuffed that Lullah has got her dream job. She’s my real-life actual proof that dreams come true and if that’s not amazing x 100, then I really don’t know what is.

But at the risk of sounding like a selfish Suzie, I miss her.

A lot.

I miss her tying pretty-coloured ribbons in my hair and calling me ‘kiddo’, I miss her making me hot chocolate with huge pink and white yumsville marshmallows and what I miss most, is that when she was around, the parentals didn’t argue as much.

But that’s probably because when Lullah moved in, dad moved out.

Only temporarily apparently, but if I’m honest, it was a welcome relief because, boy, can those crazy-adult types argue. If there were a gold medal for raised voices and inaudible vocab, my parentals would win it. Hands down.

Just before she got in her taxi to the airport, Lullah read my palm. She traced hear chipped, pretty-in pink varnished nail across a long line that went from one side of my palm to the other, looked up and smiled.

“Lola Love, you’re going to be a star!” she laughed, pointing at my hand.

I laughed back because Lullah always said that. And well, if I didn’t laugh, there was a good chance I was going to cry.

“It’s true!” Lullah promised. “See your life line? Your life will be just like a movie, the very best kind. You will write the script and most importantly you’ll be the leading lady–I absolutely promise!”

“Whatever,” I replied. It’s fair to say I wasn’t completely convinced.

“No, really, Lola,” Lullah wasn’t one to give up easily. “Do you really think I would be going to New York right now if I hadn’t made the decdecision I wanted to? We make our own destinies–if you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got. But if you want things to change, then it’s up to you to make those changes happen, then I promise, when you do, your life will be an absolute blockbuster.”

I figured that was a pretty big promise and one she wouldn’t make unless it was definitely true, but now she’s gone, well, I’m not so sure. But it definitely got me thinking.

Thing is, Lullah’s never, ever wrong. She’s just magic like that.

Which is probably why, when I was busy making the most of my last Lullah hug–that I made last for an entire forever, I agreed to look out for THEM.

IM to self: In future, under no circumstances, make NO deals with Aunt Tallulah. Not unless they involve ME going to live in NY with her. Indefinitely.

Meet ‘Them.’

Her cat–imaginatively named ‘Cat’ in homage to Holly Golightly’s feline friend in Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Not unlike the movie version, this Cat has ’tude. I have the multiple scratches on my arm, thigh, shoulder, back and hand to prove it.

And her older, substantially less fun sister–Scarlett.

My mother.

Like Cat, she too has ’tude, along with a permanent, judgemental frown where her mouth is meant to be.

Like I said before, welcome to my life, Welcome to Sucksville.

To: princess.lullah@email.com

From: lola@lolasland.com

Subject: I’m a starlet, get me out of here!

Lullah, you’ve got to save me!

There is a severe, 99.9% chance that I’m about to die of a not-even-cureable case of boredomitis.

No, really. I’m not even joking. What is a joke is that in my journal, after our little talk before you left, I have laughing titled this summer vacay ‘the summer of re-invention’ after our little talk before you left. Ha.