Ricardo E. Facci - Constructing conyugal love

To talk in couples

1. Do we talk about our sex?

2. What do we feel when we deliver ourselves to the other?

3. How do we see our sexual behavior?

4. In what must we improve sexually to grow in our relationship?

To pray together

Lord,

We give you thanks and we praise,

because you are the God of love.

You have created us, male and female,

with endless craving for love.

You want that our intimate delivery

is a sacrament,

a sign that you love us.

And also,

that our physical delivery

is a sacrament from within ourselves,

a sign that expresses

the language of our love.

Thank you, Lord,

because through that delivery

You let us know each other

every day more and better,

and above all,

Thank you because, in that with our love,

We mutually support and aid.

And furthermore, our children are born;

the most precious possession.

Thank you, Lord

Amen.

Called to be faithful

“The LORD, the LORD, the compassionate and

gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and

faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands (Ex-34, 6-7).

Remain faithful until death,

and I will give you the Crown of life

(Apoc. 2: 10).

I promise to be faithful both in prosperity

as in the face of adversity... all of my life”

(Roman ritual).

God is rich in true love, hence his love will last for all generations. Christians must remain faithful to the Lord, to death, to receive the crown of life. Fidelity focuses on the large and small things of our existence. For spouses this fidelity is the framework of the marriage Covenant.

In the sacrament of marriage you have given a word: promise to be faithful both in prosperity and adversity, in health and in sickness: Faithfulness is what keeps and attains the word given to the other person.

Now, what is it to be faithful in marriage? What is it to keep and attain the word given in the sacrament? Many people think that being unfaithful is to forget the marriage Covenant, to share with a third person your body.

Obviously this understanding isn't bad, but we will see that it is even much deeper. Jesus did not abolish the not to kill, but He gave it a more positive perspective, love your enemies. We will delve further to reach the “be faithful” in marriage.

• You are my owner: Being faithful is to live the permanent reality that each is the other, under the mutual donation made before the altar. Without fidelity, to be the possession of another, when shared with a third person, marriage becomes simply a figure, being not only an act against the sixth commandment, but also an action against justice, since there is in the body it’s possession of the spouse. Therefore, to share with a third person is stealing. No one can serve two masters, or one or the other, Jesus said. What more?

Read again the words of Jesus: I say that you who are looking at a woman with evil desire has committed adultery in his heart. We add to this: or a male. Because at that moment, is it not the husband of the wife? It is worth discussion, isn't it?

• I married you to make you happy: We agreed that fidelity goes way beyond what we usually think. What does it matter to not “cheat” on your spouse if in everyday life you do not try to make them happy because of s bad mood or a lack of interest? On the day of the marriage each pledged to make the other happy. Therefore, every gesture, word or failure which does not contribute to the other being happy, are transformed into crumbs of infidelity to the marriage Covenant. Think about it.

• Moreover, I married you to make you eternally happy: Every spouse should be concerned with being in grace to grow with the spouse, trying to make him/her eternally happy by means of Devoutness.

There are many other elements that are signs of fidelity:

• Dialogue: If the sincere thoughts and feelings not fully shared, something is hidden from the other. Is this faithfulness?

• Joy: Another of the signs of the desire to be faithful to the engagement is to always look to bring joy to the spouse and family. Infidelity goes arm in arm with bitterness. Fidelity is expressed in joy.

• Interest in the other: Being faithful is also to worry and take care of the spouse, their interests and problems.

• The Cross: If everything were not enough, remember that as spouses you promised to be faithful “in adversity and sickness.” Therefore, fidelity claims that each help the other to bear their sufferings, their sorrows, their falls. In the end, to be faithful is to help carry the cross, as the Cyrene helped Jesus.

To talk in couples

1. Are we truly faithful in all that this implies?

2. What can we begin to do to enhance our faithfulness?

To pray together

Thank you, Lord,

Because on the day

of our marriage Sacrament,

you gave us, among other things,

the grace of fidelity.

Help us to always keep this present,

in order to be mutually faithful

until the end of our lives,

in all. Especially

in the small things of every day

so when major tests arrive

they do not take us unprepared,

and we can, thus,

stay in our love.

Amen.

II

We want to Be Happy

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