Roberto Badenas - Facing Sufering

Series: Seeds of Hope

Title: Facing Sufering

Original title in Spanish edition: Frente al dolor

Author: Roberto Badenas

Project Development and Design: Editorial Safeliz Staff

Translator: Darlene Stillman

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October 2013: First Edition

ISBN:978-84-7208-443-4

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Dedicated to all those with whom pain has united me:

To those to whom I have caused pain,

And to those who have made me suffer;

To those who have shared their sorrows with me,

And to those with whom I have shared mine….

And especially, to the millions who suffer

not being able to do anything for them,

Apart from writing presumably on their behalf.

Roberto Badenas

holds a Doctorate in Theology from Andrews University (Michigan, USA). He is a specialist in Biblical Studies and professor of New Testament. From 1990 to 1999 he was dean of the Adventist Theological Seminary at the Adventist University of France (Collonges-sous-Saleve), and from 1999 to 2010, president of the Biblical Research Committee, and director of Family Ministries and Education (EUD, Berne, Switzerland). Before this book, Professor Badenas published many other texts in other languages (including numerous articles), and the books Christ the End of the Law. Romans 10:4 in Pauline Perspective (JSOT Press, Sheffield University, 1985) and Meet Jesus (Autumn House, 1995), also published in Spanish, French, German, Italian, Portuguese, Romanian, and Catalan.

Contents

Introduction: An Ever-Present Enemy 10

Part i. Awareness 15

1 What We Mean By Pain 17

2 Expressing Our Pain 29

3 Heeding the Warning Signs 39

4 A Hard Why to Accept 55Part II. A Clooser Look 71

5 The Enigma of Evil 73

6 Traditional Explanations 89

7 God’s Silence 103

8 Faith and Healing 119Part iii. Support 141

9 Learning to Ease the Pain 143

10 The Keys to Survival 161

11 Aging With Serenity 177

12 Being There at the End 189

13 Facing Death 205

14 Grief and Mourning 225

15 Epilogue: No More Pain 207

Introduction:

An Ever-Present Enemy

Few human experiences are as universal as pain. It is almost impossible for us to go through life without suffering from a health problem, without having an accident, without a friend or spouse, failing us, or without a loved one dying.

We only have to exist to suffer and cause pain. From Adam to the most recent newborn, from Job and Jesus, to the most uncelebrated soldier from the most forgotten war, the shadow of pain darkens the lives of everyone. We are not safe from suffering, regardless of how well we plan our lives. We are all exposed to suffering in one way or another, from our first baby teeth to the last aches of old age. Disease, decrepitude, remorse, existential angst, heartache…. If someone claims never to have suffered, that person has lost his memory. In a myriad of forms, be it acute, violent, dull, excruciating, or persistent, pain wears down the body and oppresses the spirit. It abounds in the life of the poor and ruins the life of the rich. It makes a child cry, disfigures a young person’s body, mars an adult’s face, and slumps the shoulders of the elderly. From the cradle to the grave, our suffering is relentless. Work and pleasure, dependence and freedom, virtue and vice, love and hate, all can make us suffer. Pain is part of our human condition.1We could say that we are no longer children when we realize that a mother’s kiss cannot take away all of our sorrows….

We only have to open a newspaper, walk down the halls of a hospital, or visit any cemetery to prove that this is the reality of life. Suffering haunts us and plagues us.2 In the last years, while I was writing this book, twenty people I know well have gone through some sort of intense suffering, and ten of them have since died. One of them was my father….

In the face of this unforgiving reality, our first instinct is to rise up and rebel in a thousand ways. Any twinge of pain puts the sensitive defense mechanisms of our bodies on alert. Like Ponce de León,3 we seek the fountain of eternal youth or of happiness in pleasures, medicines, therapies, treatments, and a thousand other practices…Like Ponce de Leon we fail to find it. The risk—and the certainty—of suffering and dying dominate our naive dreams. We attempt to avoid or fight both realities, but ultimately resign ourselves to accept them when we have no other choice. The question of suffering is so vast and complex that it would be pretentious to try to cover all of its dimensions ––medical, psychological, social, philosophical, and spiritualin a single book. Thus this book only addresses some of the more practical and existential aspects of pain in our daily life, from my personal perspective of believer. Despite millennia of reflection and research, the realm of pain has yet to be completely explored. This book attempts, in all modesty, to help us face suffering with dignity and realism.

Part One of the book, which is of an informative nature, outlines an awareness of the complexity of the issue and its various implications. Part Two presents a series of theoretical and practical reflections regarding the ultimate why behind suffering and attempts to understand its meaning. Part Three, with the layman in mind, provides simple resources to face suffering with compassion, effectiveness, and tact. The goal is seeking to avoid pain in the first place, and when that is unfeasible, to alleviate it.

The ultimate objective of this book is to help face and cope with the reality of pain as much as possible.

I am not an expert on the subject of pain. I have no doubt that many of my readers, through personal or professional experience, know more of the subject than I do. I write only as a witness, almost as a “suffering subject.” If my optimistic nature tends to dodge pain, my philosophical training, and above all my personal and pastoral experience, have made me quite sensitive to the subject.

This book has been much more difficult to write than my previous books, and undoubtedly it would never have come to fruition without the collaboration of an excellent group of especially dear people. First I would like to thank my physician friends, José Manuel Prat, Miguel Gracia Antequera, Marcelle Lafond, and Caleb Mercier, who were kind enough to review these pages from a professional point of view, and who have provided me with much invaluable advice beyond their respective specialties. My gratitude also goes to my dear colleague Roberto Carbonell, hospital chaplain, who daily confronts suffering and death, for generously sharing his personal testimonies with me; to chaplain Dr. Mario Ceballos, for his helpful contributions in bibliography; to Dr. Angel Manuel Rodriguez, for his useful theological insights; to Dr. Herold Weiss for his intelligent and sensitive thoughts on the subject; to my young friends, Ramon Junqueras and Guillermo Sánchez, for sharing the priceless contributions of their creative talents with me; to Juan Fernando Sánchez, for his tireless and competent editorial assistance, and again, to Marta Prats, for her valuable literary advice and unconditional support.

I write this book out of solidarity with those who suffer, out of a sense of duty, I would almost say “in self-defense,”4motivated by my own rejection and powerlessness in the face of our common experience. This book seeks to answer the following questions: