Veronica Semenova - Faces of Grief. Overcoming the Pain of Loss

Maria, a 32-year-old doctoral student, lost her 44-year-old mother when she was 13 years old. Her mother died 6 months after receiving a diagnosis of ovarian cancer. The tumor was diagnosed at a late stage: it had already metastasized to the liver, intestine, and lungs, and there was no possibility of any treatment. All the doctors could offer was end-of-life pain control.

Maria didn’t know about her mother’s diagnosis until the final weeks of her mother’s life, when her mother became too weak to get out of bed. She still remembers crying every day at her mother’s bedside, hugging her, and smelling her hair while her mother told her “I love you, I love you, I love you”. Maria’s father was heartbroken. He could not stop sobbing and seemed to have completely lost the will to live.

After the funeral was over and the hundreds of relatives and friends who came to say their good-byes left, Maria remembers feeling drained and empty. There were no more tears and no energy for crying or even talking. There was nothing to keep her connected to her friends – they all had their mothers next to them, and nobody understood what it felt like to lay your mother to rest and return to an empty house where Mum was no more…

Every item in the house and every little detail had been touched by her mother’s hands. It was both a blessing and a curse to be where she once had been. Maria’s life changed abruptly and forever.

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